OT: Gifs of my Colonoscopy [j/k]

[Song80s]

I bet you thought I would

 

Had my screening this am. This is my 2nd so I am an old timer.

 

I believe they are recommended at 50, give or take due to family history.

 

So if you are due, stop procrastinating/making excuses and get it done.

 

The procedure is not a big deal IMO.

 

The fasting [only clear liquid], no coffee is a big deal. Have such a hankering

for a nasty pepperoni pizza with plastic cheese.

 

And the margarita mix/gavilyte is not a keeper. Drinking a gallon

of that is close to water boarding.

 

When I got home from Kaiser, I enjoyed crushing the container for the recycle.

 

What did you do for fun today ?

[ElmerJFudd]

You made it, Greg, and I am glad to hear that it is now over. I am just a few years out and not pleased with your description at all, although I know it's entirely accurate.

 

Getting old sucks. Stay strong brothers!

[Aidan]

Screened last year. They found eight pre-cancerous polyps and removed them. Not comfy for a couple of days but glad they got discovered when they did. I'd recommend all the sedation offered...on the initial appointment, I figured I'd be fine, and was right until the camera went around the first 'bend'...

[David Emm]

Hopping Deity of choice! And here I had thought J. Dan was good at TMI!

 

I had a clownoscopy and was a bit surprised afterwards to be given a color printout of several internal pics. I cut them out and glued them under the return addresses on several Xmas gifts going to people whom I knew would laugh rather than retching. I consider it to be an amusing form of recycling. Now let's discuss that infamous Moog BROWN note.

[ksoper]

True story: I got the gallon jug and citrus "flavor" packet and set about my business as my nurse practitioner wife left for the day. It was like drinking spit. I choked down all but one cup. When she came home she expressed surprise that I ingested all that I did. She said, "Most people drink a portion or two and then call the office for the pill."

 

Pill? What pill? I could've killed her.

 

 

[Adan]

The purging is not fun, but it gave me a chance to experience something I never would have opted for . . . a total cleanse. It's actually a great feeling to give your GI tract a fresh start. Not that I'd do it again voluntarily, but it's a reference point for what healthy living feels like, and how far from that I can sometimes be.

[Sospiri]

At 81 I'm getting to be an old timer with colonoscopies, angiograms, and blood tests galore, but I'm still here, though I'm sure that annoys a few people! The last colonoscopy was combined with an endoscopy, so they went in from both ends. It has the added advantage of only one lot of valium and that awful orange-flavoured sh*talot and I can now forget about both for a while. Saw the nephrologist this morning and he's happy, so no more planned blood tests until next May. However, I'm pretty sure that keeping me alive is just a job creation scheme for the medical profession - bless them. Have fun guys!

[kelp]

Had my first a few years ago. No problems. Yes, the cleansing is a bit of an experience. I do remember feeling like I had been poisoned for several days afterward by that gallon o' nastiness.

[Song80s]

You made it, Greg, and I am glad to hear that it is now over. I am just a few years out and not pleased with your description at all, although I know it's entirely accurate.

 

Getting old sucks. Stay strong brothers!

 

Thank you for the words of encouragement, young Luke

 

Whats great about ' getting old ' is I have more spare time for my music and keyboards.

 

And the nurses at Kaiser where hella cute. One was a Raiders fan. Naturally, I made fun

of her hungover state and old silver face paint. She threatened to with hold the narcotic

in my IV.

 

I claimed I had not been high in 20 years and needed more narco.

[Song80s]

Screened last year. They found eight pre-cancerous polyps and removed them. Not comfy for a couple of days but glad they got discovered when they did. I'd recommend all the sedation offered...on the initial appointment, I figured I'd be fine, and was right until the camera went around the first 'bend'...

 

8 is a magic #. I am a polyp amateur at 2.

 

I am sure I have a YouTube of.... [ never mind]

 

No pain here. I did take a nice nap. And had my first blasting

strong coffee after 2 full days of caffeine withdrawal.

 

We must compare notes on health care. Have a Kronos

buddy in your country and he is not pleased with his H/c.

 

In contrast, my H/c coverage is tip-top.

[Song80s]

Hopping Deity of choice! And here I had thought J. Dan was good at TMI!

 

I had a clownoscopy and was a bit surprised afterwards to be given a color printout of several internal pics. I cut them out and glued them under the return addresses on several Xmas gifts going to people whom I knew would laugh rather than retching. I consider it to be an amusing form of recycling. Now let's discuss that infamous Moog BROWN note.

 

its great to be nuts. I admire that and do my salty best every day.

[Song80s]

True story: I got the gallon jug and citrus "flavor" packet and set about my business as my nurse practitioner wife left for the day. It was like drinking spit. I choked down all but one cup. When she came home she expressed surprise that I ingested all that I did. She said, "Most people drink a portion or two and then call the office for the pill."

 

Pill? What pill? I could've killed her.

 

 

WHAT pill ? I had to take a laxative and the 64 gallon Margarita mix.

 

If what you say is true... I am exploring my legal options..

[GRollins]

Both my parents died of cancer...colon cancer. Don't buy that bullshit about "don't worry about the pain--we can make you comfortable." It's a damned lie. Both my parents died in agony.

 

Neither had had a colonoscopy.

 

Ever.

 

Me? I said fuck that. I don't want to go down that way. I've been doing the colonoscopy thing since I was 45 or so. So far, I've had one polyp. Just the one. Fingers crossed that it's the only one, ever. Had my most recent colonoscopy this past summer. Clean as a whistle. Good to go for another five years. Yippee!

 

Look, say what you will about the prep process, it's better than dying. I'd do it every year if I had to. Glad to say that I don't have to, but if that's what it takes, then...yeah, I'm there.

 

Grey

 

P.S.: I asked for the big, high resolution photo files of my most recent procedure. Freaked them absolutely out. They said no one had ever asked for pictures above and beyond the little thumbnails that they put on the report. Fooey. I paid for 'em. I want 'em. Besides, I'm a nerd/geek/whatever this year's term is. I find that sort of thing interesting. It's not like the inside of your mouth, which you can see easily. The opportunity only comes up once every five years. Might as well take advantage of it.

[Song80s]

The purging is not fun, but it gave me a chance to experience something I never would have opted for . . . a total cleanse. It's actually a great feeling to give your GI tract a fresh start. Not that I'd do it again voluntarily, but it's a reference point for what healthy living feels like, and how far from that I can sometimes be.

 

I know exactly what you are saying.

 

"A happy colon is a happy life"

 

I also lost that nagging 5 pounds that was sticking around. But I digress

[GRollins]

I've never heard of a pill option, either. I just drink the stuff and get empty. The most recent prep was two rounds of (I think) a pint each. The flavor wasn't any better than I remember from last time, but at least I didn't have to drink a gallon.

 

Grey

[Song80s]

Both my parents died of cancer...colon cancer. Don't buy that bullshit about "don't worry about the pain--we can make you comfortable." It's a damned lie. Both my parents died in agony.

 

Neither had had a colonoscopy.

 

Me? I said fuck that. I don't want to go down that way. I've been doing the colonoscopy thing since I was 45 or so. So far, I've had one polyp. Just the one. Fingers crossed that it's the only one, ever. Had my most recent colonoscopy this past summer. Clean as a whistle. Good to go for another five years. Yippee!

 

Look, say what you will about the prep process, it's better than dying. I'd do it every year if I had to. Glad to say that I don't have to, but if that's what it takes, then...yeah, I'm there.

 

Grey

 

P.S.: I asked for the big, high resolution photo files of my most recent procedure. Freaked them absolutely out. They said no one had ever asked for pictures above and beyond the little thumbnails that they put on the report. Fooey. I paid for 'em. I want 'em. Besides, I'm a nerd/geek/whatever this year's term is. I find that sort of thing interesting. It's not like the inside of your mouth, which you can see easily. The opportunity only comes up once every five years. Might as well take advantage of it.

 

Who says we have to be exactly like our parents ?

 

I am in total agreement with you, brother.

 

I have also asked for JPG's of my 2 charming and departed polyp twins.

After all they met the knife without any proper ceremony.

Least I can do is compose a song with photos about them.

 

I have in-laws and out-laws who are terrified of hospitals . Some claim

they are 'smarter ' than doctors since they can google and read Rx legal warnings.

These same ' smart ones' end up in the emergency room and a hospital bed

for 2 weeks. I consider this denial to be a form of paranoia.

 

Somewhat related is a comment about how some people can ignore

standard health care and 'juice ' themselves to perfect health.

Or IV vitamin themselves when they have some horrible flu

from Africa.

 

Steve Jobs would still be alive if he trusted standard medical care.

Juicing did not cure him. So much for stubbornness and having a powerful

mind.

 

Knowledge is a wonderful thing. Specialized knowledge is a gift

worth sharing.

[ksoper]

From Dr Google:

 

"The latest answer to the palatability problem is Visicol and OsmoPrep oral sodium phosphate in tablet form. The tablets are taken four at a time, every 15 minutes, with eight ounces of a clear liquid 20 tablets the night before the colonoscopy, and 12 to 20 tablets a few hours before the procedure. Nov 1, 2008"

[Song80s]

From Dr Google:

 

"The latest answer to the palatability problem is Visicol and OsmoPrep oral sodium phosphate in tablet form. The tablets are taken four at a time, every 15 minutes, with eight ounces of a clear liquid 20 tablets the night before the colonoscopy, and 12 to 20 tablets a few hours before the procedure. Nov 1, 2008"

 

only 20 pills ? How about pain killers for severe stomach cramps ?

 

Just tossing it around. There are numerous flakey pill sites as we can imagine.

 

I will review the topic with a few experts - one of which is a highly regarded nurse practitioner at UCSD.

 

I am still in 'recovery ' for margarita mix/gavilyte.

[Dave Ferris]

At 65, I've now had two. One at around 52, the traditional way -- yes recall the purging and about 3 days post recovery for running. You don't realize how much is taken out of you till you get out there in the first mile. I was extremely weak for the first few days.

 

Because the first one looked so clear - the Doc at the facility said, if everyone looked this good we'd be out of business, see you in 10 years - at 63 my Primary care Doc cleared me to do this:

 

Colo-Guard

https://www.cologuardtest.com/

 

Partial Moral of that story - keep running the miles and flushing that crap out. That's a huge part of it course but so are genes and diet. And an overall healthy lifestyle.

 

Glad to hear it was a clean bill of health Greg.

 

I already had the one bout with the Prostate Cancer a few years back that required only the 8 weeks radiation. A walk in the park compared to what other friends of mine have gone through.....and unfortunately some that are no longer here.

[Song80s]

Good to hear from you, Dave. I am 66.

Had my first screen at 48 yrs of age.

 

Been on this Kaiser wellness plan for 2 decades and I think its

top rung.

 

I complete a brief fecal kit, a home procedure, every year.

My results are always negative.

 

Just the same, I suppose the screening is excellent for serious detection.

 

Your advice is great, just as great as your playing on that beautiful

Steinway. The cancer can strike quickly.

 

Great to read your victory over life's challenges.

 

I have written a few songs somewhat related.

 

I have Afib which was the impetus to an original named "Heart of Steel" .

My Kaiser GP and Cardiologist loved it:

 

I am nowhere in your league for performance but I can get around

the Kronos in my own way

 

 

 

 

[Song80s]

At 81 I'm getting to be an old timer with colonoscopies, angiograms, and blood tests galore, but I'm still here, though I'm sure that annoys a few people! The last colonoscopy was combined with an endoscopy, so they went in from both ends. It has the added advantage of only one lot of valium and that awful orange-flavoured sh*talot and I can now forget about both for a while. Saw the nephrologist this morning and he's happy, so no more planned blood tests until next May. However, I'm pretty sure that keeping me alive is just a job creation scheme for the medical profession - bless them. Have fun guys!

 

I thoroughly enjoy your accumulated wisdom.

 

maybe there's a skill and a story on how we avoid the final dance with the devil

 

I hope to visit your beautiful country soon. Its in my top 3 for travel.

[MoodyBluesKeys]

I had a couple of colonoscopies where I drank the recommended mixture of Gatoraid and MiraLax - each time I threw the mess up and wound up having to re-schedule (and go through it again) the next day.

Finally, a doctor told me that I could mix the MiraLax with White Grape Juice and probably keep it down better. That worked better.

 

Still better than colon cancer. I'm in the middle of 9 weeks of radiation now for prostate cancer; and also the 2 years of androgen deprivation therapy. Both diagnosis and treatment have improved greatly in recent years. My father didn't find out about his until it was way too late back in the early 90's.

 

[Tom Williams]

Joining the club, I had my first up-periscope at 55 years old, another this past summer at 58-59 because they found some pre-cancerous polyps the first time. I'm thus on a triannual schedule. (This last time they only found one, and it wasn't very "angry.")

 

My prep is a combination of Miralax/Gatorade and a couple of laxative pills, the day before the photo session. I believe the Gatorade is to replenish the salts lost through the massive diarrhea.

 

The rules I receive allow me to also eat certain colors of Jello (e.g., peach) and drink coffee, broth, tea, and wonderful white grape juice. Oh, and popsickles are permitted too, though I usually don't get around to eating them.

[Joe Muscara]

I had one thirteen years ago looking for a problem (there wasn't one) and one last summer. I told them going in I wanted to take advantage of the knockout to get some extra rest (hadn't slept well lately) and they all laughed. After the procedure, they had trouble waking me up. I told them. I enjoyed it though I would have taken more.

[Outkaster]

Funny this thread comes up. I work at a teaching hospital so I got it done in network on November 8th at one of our ambulatory clinics. Everyone said how bad the prep was but I stayed close to home and watched TV. Gatoraid and MiraLax was the thing for me and 4 laxitive tablets. It wasn't so bad and I didn't get hungry except for two hours before it. I was worried about the anesthesia. Now they have a new drug that is a benzo and it knocked me out. From what I had heard I thought I would be under or partially awake. I was sick for 4 days after because of how the drug passed through my system. Now because of one polyp, they said is not cancerous but want met back every 5 years at 55 for monitoring.

[Legatoboy]

Welcome to the Rear-Ended club...

[Song80s]

Joining the club, I had my first up-periscope at 55 years old, another this past summer at 58-59 because they found some pre-cancerous polyps the first time. I'm thus on a triannual schedule. (This last time they only found one, and it wasn't very "angry.")

 

My prep is a combination of Miralax/Gatorade and a couple of laxative pills, the day before the photo session. I believe the Gatorade is to replenish the salts lost through the massive diarrhea.

 

The rules I receive allow me to also eat certain colors of Jello (e.g., peach) and drink coffee, broth, tea, and wonderful white grape juice. Oh, and popsickles are permitted too, though I usually don't get around to eating them.

 

I am ok with losing salt for 2 days. Its due to blood pressure. Less salt is better for hypertension - Which gets me ranting as the processed food industry is determined to either kill us or put us a permanent dosage of a fancy variety of Rx.

 

And that wonderful white grape juice, if you pounded 64 oz in to cleanse, that loaded

320 grams of sugar into your old body.

 

The American Heart Association advises keeping your sugar intake to 25 g per day for women and 37 g per day for men.

 

So there you have it from Doctor Greg of the Internet. Todays processed Food is loaded tons of salt and sugar because the food they peddle would be bland from all the factory processing and additional chemicals loaded in.

 

But the packaging of processed food is so nice and colorful , screaming 'healthy ' and low fat. The food companies have noticed that many busy busy consumers are sheep and don't have time to read and evaluate food labeling.

 

None of this is news. My rant is another annoying reminder that diet and todays food consumption is complex. And big business. Buyer beware.

[Sospiri]

GregC, true, it's a beautiful country and really nice people, though I am a Brit and have only lived her for 14 years, but I love it. But I do have a Greek son-in-law and family living a few miles away.

 

Regarding the sedation, they naturally don't want to give you any more dope than is necessary, but towards the end of the very first one I felt a pain in my gut and yelled out. I remember the medic saying "Almost finished" and ever since, even though different medics in different countries, when made aware of the problem, they've upped the dosage a bit and I've never had a problem.

 

But as several have said, it's nothing to worry about and a hundred times better than dying. Stay healthy guys!

 

[BenWaB3]

I had my 3rd one last week. Maybe it's an East Coast thing but my prep was the same as Tom Williams' and Outkaster's. And although the prep period is rather miserable I kept telling myself that there were plenty of people with worse conditions who would be happy to trade with me compared to what they're going through on a daily basis. After this, plus getting "the finger" for prostate exam 2 weeks before that I'm thinking getting probed by aliens would complete the trifecta!

[Desert Rat]

From Dr Google:

 

"The latest answer to the palatability problem is Visicol and OsmoPrep oral sodium phosphate in tablet form. The tablets are taken four at a time, every 15 minutes, with eight ounces of a clear liquid 20 tablets the night before the colonoscopy, and 12 to 20 tablets a few hours before the procedure. Nov 1, 2008"

 

From another spot on Google: https://lacolon.com/patient-education/discontinued-colonoscopy-preparation-visicol-tablets-and-osmoprep-tablets

 

Definitely would not be my choice to take "the pills". And I have had 3 colonoscopies (age 61).

 

Personally, the best part of the procedure for me is being on the other end of the needle, having administered anesthesia for hundreds of colonoscopies in the last 37 years.

Now, count backwards from 100....oh, yeah.