9.25 million dollar home and NO food or drink !!!

[Dr88s]

Agree with JustDan.

 

Let's call out the jerks for being jerks. Nothing more.

 

 

[Bill H.]

If it's just me doing my piano bar thing for an upscale function, I'm almost always treated very well. I don't think I've ever been given restrictions as to where I can and cannot go, and I'm usually given access to the buffet as well.

 

If I'm part of a band things are much different

[allan_evett]

I've had a mix of positive and negative experiences with clients all across the spectrum. But some negative situations can make it quite a challenge to bite one's own tongue - as Dave Ferris pointed out. That's where staying professional is essential, even though difficult. Poor behavior owns no particular demographic.

[Synthoid]

If it's just me doing my piano bar thing for an upscale function, I'm almost always treated very well. I don't think I've ever been given restrictions as to where I can and cannot go, and I'm usually given access to the buffet as well.

 

Solo gigs are usually like that. I played a solo piano gig at an art gallery earlier this summer and had free access to the goodies when I took my break. No restrictions, raised eyebrows, or wrist slapping.

 

[SK]

Snobs will be snobs regardless of net worth, and it's certainly frustrating when you have to play/work for them. (Sorry you had to deal with jerks, Dave.)

 

Maybe the reason many of us have had bad experiences with rich snobs' private parties is because, ahem... the less than rich can't afford live music for their private functions.

[I-missRichardTee]

My experience has been that the "rich folks" themselves usually turn out to be pretty pleasant.

 

That's often been the case for me as well.

 

I can't think of a single time the "rich" person has been an A-hole. It's always the caterer or somebody like that. In fact, I take great pleasure when, to the dismay of the bossy caterer, the person paying the bills chooses to hang with the band and have fun.

 

Honestly, I find the generalizations in this thread troubling. What if the tables were turned? A band shows up late, plays loud, and is getting stoned in the van on break, and the "rich" person says "I hate musicians...they're all a bunch of unprofessional stoners". You know there are a THOSE bands out there, but they are the minority. You wouldn't want people to assume that about you based on a bad experience. In fact, your treatment at a gig like this probably has more to do with that stereotype than the fact that they were rich.

 

In terms of the trend in rich people being less charitable, and increasing income inequality... I think this whole class warfare has had the opposite result of what was intended. It's a very basic instinct that can be demonstrated with a baby. Give a baby a toy to play with. Try to snatch if out of his hands and his natural reaction is to pull back. Put out your hand, smile, and ask "can I play with it too?", and he'll smile and hand it over.

 

Because I have respect for you.. well earned respect.. I will say I will try to keep my mind open in future. But on balance richer people are colder, and cheaper too. On balance. I have known some extremely nice rich people.. true.

[Bill Spencer]

I don't get why the amount of money the clients have has anything to do with the story. You complain that they look down on the 'old' car out front while you seem to be a bit judgemental about them having money...

 

Hey, we've all been there, I've done plenty of gigs where 'lower class' people paid well and treated us like crap... or paid poorly and treated us like kings...don't think there's a particular pattern.....

[Brettymike]

All my "Richies"(multimillionaires) have been more than awesome , who I meet frequently with my line of work in my business.

BUT,I could imagine people existing as described in the story , I wouldn't mind betting they have links to the N.W.O.

I don't think I have played music for anyone seriously wealthy , the few lavish weddings I have done with the band have probably been put on the "plastic fantastic" .

 

Brett

[Brettymike]

I don't get why the amount of money the clients have has anything to do with the story. You complain that they look down on the 'old' car out front while you seem to be a bit judgemental about them having money...

 

Hey, we've all been there, I've done plenty of gigs where 'lower class' people paid well and treated us like crap... or paid poorly and treated us like kings...don't think there's a particular pattern.....

 

+1!

 

Brett

[I-missRichardTee]

I don't get why the amount of money the clients have has anything to do with the story. You complain that they look down on the 'old' car out front while you seem to be a bit judgemental about them having money...

 

Hey, we've all been there, I've done plenty of gigs where 'lower class' people paid well and treated us like crap... or paid poorly and treated us like kings...don't think there's a particular pattern.....

 

Sadly, my experiences ( loads of them ) lean me towards my bias. But I respect you guys, so I will challenge my negative beliefs about the rich and super rich... and heck, start looking for more buttholes among peons like, me!

[Brettymike]

A lot of the truly mega rich simply don't flaunt it.

 

Brett

[MuzikTeechur]

I've been treated poorly by rich and not-so-rich alike. However, that's a rare occurrence.

My observation is that the better I have to dress for a gig, the more I'm treated like "the help."

[I-missRichardTee]

I've been treated poorly by rich and not-so-rich alike. However, that's a rare occurrence.

My observation is that the better I have to dress for a gig, the more I'm treated like "the help."

 

And your observation, is seconded by a local great guitar player, and guitar amp builder Jeff Snider who told me he flat out will not put a tux on!

[analogman1]

Great story, and typical of what we have all encountered at some point in our careers. I agree with the guys above, in essence, "money can't buy class!!!"

 

Merry Christmas everyone!!!

 

Tom

[marino]

Dave - I feel for you, because I played a very similar gig last night.

It was a solo piano thing. After showing with large advance at a spectacular ancient villa on the hills just outside Rome, I hauled my Studiologic 2001, Kurzweil K2600r, and amp (all very heavy stuff - I had to sell my VMK176 last month in another financial emergency) to the huge hall where the dinner was to take place. They had reserved a minuscule space for me, and they heard no reason about giving me any kind of visibility. I was forced to eat something from the buffet before starting to play - that was late afternoon. I was instructed to play continuously during the dinner (a wedding anniversary) except when someone would stand up to make a speech. There were quite a few long speeches during the evening, so I didn't bother to ask for breaks.

One time, I stopped playing for about one minute, just to breathe and drink a sip of water, and the idiot-in-charge immediately came to me: "Play! Why aren't you playing?"

 

The atmosphere was nothing short of depressing. I was playing my repertoire of jazz standards, but I could have been playing nursery rhymes or anything else, as long as they could hear some 'pling-pling' in the background. Very often, in these cases I try to get some attention by some kind of virtuoso playing, and usually, I succeed to get some nice word, if not an applause, from some sensitive soul. But these people were so detached from everything that I just didn't bother and gave them what they wanted, which was wallpaper sound, thinking about something else for the whole night.

Several times, the nice-guy-in-charge advised me to lower my barely audible volume. There was no way that anybody from the tables could understand what I was playing.

 

If they had played records the whole night, at that volume, nobody could have detected a difference. Basically, I was there just to show to the people entering the hall that they had a pianist, too.

The part of the night that I enjoyed the most was the very brief snack/dinner, in the company of the waiters. Some of them were quite pleasant to talk with, and a couple knew something about jazz. They showed after dinner, to compliment me and to say things like, "man, what are you doing here?!" A nice, but sad, remark.

 

I was hungry as hell at that point, but nothing was left for me. Someone took pity and brought a bottle of water.

 

At one o' clock in the morning, after I had finished loading the car, the great-guy-in-charge had left the place, and someone who I had never seen came to me with a check that was for less money than the already shameful amount that we had agreed upon. I asked for explanations, and he just said, "I know nothing, you have to ask him". So I will be forced to run and phone and fight for my hard-earned money during the next few days.

 

Ten yers ago, I would have refused such a gig, unless it paid six times more than this one. I'm too tired now to reflect about that, but there's obviously something very wrong in all this.

Sorry for the vent.

 

 

[I-missRichardTee]

My compadre, in my ancestors home.. southern Italy, ( now don't start with me about Naples versus Calabria again lol )

What is happening, is the world is changing. And it is bigger than anyone of us. The economy is diminishing for people who love art. Once we can accept this, we can be a bit less consumed by it.

I have been in your shoes before , I get it. One of my steady gigs has just ended - no more jazz trio, now it will be vocal duo.. whoopee. My other Blues ( In an Italian restaurant- those italians like their musica) gig, my pay varies each week. I go along with it. It's nothing personal .

Buon Natale e Felice Anno Nuovo

[RABid]

I suggest you try to get the same gig next year. Make sure the entire band has a big meal of pinto beans and cabbage right before the job. As for the caterer, be sure to tell her "Please don't talk while the band is playing. Your voice has a grating quality that classes with music."

[wmp]

That's a rant worthy gig.

 

About the worst treatment I ever got was from a from a Deputy Defense Secretary. His spread on Cape Cod Bay easily tops 9.5M by now. I usually didn't sing much with that band, but most of the requested material was my turf. I had to do a lot of extra work for that gig. Early morning load in, then get lost for about four hours during the wedding ceremony and dinner.

 

Food was in the contract, but we should have been more specific. We were served leftovers from the caterer's last gig. Soggy roll up sandwiches with brown lettuce.

 

I took great pleasure in packing up at the agreed hour to beat it to my next gig.... better band, better crowd, decent pay, plus anything from the menu and bar. Mr. DOD was righteously offended that I wouldn't play another hour or two for more cash. The band was even more offended. It felt so nice to tell them that I was very hungry and that I had a previous commitment that included a rib eye dinner with all the trimmings in Chelsea.

 

That was my last gig with that band.

 

I think it was their last gig too.

 

That was over fifteen years ago and I still like to bitch about it.

 

Fortunately, that hasn't been the norm. Most weddings and private functions I've played have been great and the band was treated very well.

 

[Doerfler]

I suggest you try to get the same gig next year. Make sure the entire band has a big meal of pinto beans and cabbage right before the job. As for the caterer, be sure to tell her "Please don't talk while the band is playing. Your voice has a grating quality that classes with music."

 

[HammondDave]

I would take a rich asshole over a club manager, any day...

 

My favorite Xmas story was when My band was booked for an Amnesty International Xmas party on Balboa Island. Now, I am a very liberal guy, but these people really freaked me out. When we arrived at this multi million dollar mansion we were greeted with "Look! It's the musicians from Los Angeles!'

 

We set up our gear and started playing. Everyone was really into the heavy blues swing we were playing. They screamed their affection at the end of our opening number, when the hostess came out and stopped us. She was carrying a large cardboard box with all these weird triangle shaped hats in it. She explains to everyone that they had to try on the hats so that they could harness the alpha waves being produced by the moon.

 

We started playing again, when two songs later she came out and stopped us again. "It's time for a poetry reading!" I am not kidding you! This strange looking modern beat nick and his girlfriend started reading poetry.

 

Meanwhile, my wife is laughing her head off when this guy with no shirt comes up to her. "Hey, you are cute... Who are you here with?" My wife explains that she is with the old bald guy on keyboards. "That's cool... My name is 'Blue', I am into body work". My wife answered that this was good as she just got into a car accident and needed some scratches removed from her car. The guy says, "No man, I am into BODY work!"

 

The evening ended with some interpretive dance that was ruined by a skipping CD. You could not have written this...

[Doc Tonewheel]

Well, you just can't buy class. Folks either got it or they don't. Have a Merry Christmas Dave and everyone else here.

 

So very true! I am amazed at how many people with money are so ignorant.

[J. Dan]

But on balance richer people are colder, and cheaper too. On balance.

 

Tee, with all due respect, you simultaneously make, yet completely miss my point. I'm not judging, because I've been an offender and believe we probably all are, despite what we all say publicly. I just try to be a little better each day than I was the day before. But to the point, I have no doubt that your experience has been exactly what you say. The point us that it's YOUR experience, and doesn't necessarily correlate to the group with whom you associate the behavior.

 

The best example is the white guy who's been carjacked once in his life, and it was a black guy, so to him, black people are car jackers, because he's only been car jacked by black people. I'm guessing by now you all are seeing the fault in that logic. But replace black with rich and all bets are off. Understandably, it's because rich people have all they need - discrimination isn't really a factor. Problem is, if you can generalize hatred towards them, you can generalize hatred towards any group - race, religion, political persuasion, class. People are people, so why should it be, you and I should get along so awfully (I just made that up, you like?).

[Brettymike]

Dave - I feel for you, because I played a very similar gig last night.

It was a solo piano thing. After showing with large advance at a spectacular ancient villa on the hills just outside Rome, I hauled my Studiologic 2001, Kurzweil K2600r, and amp (all very heavy stuff - I had to sell my VMK176 last month in another financial emergency) to the huge hall where the dinner was to take place. They had reserved a minuscule space for me, and they heard no reason about giving me any kind of visibility. I was forced to eat something from the buffet before starting to play - that was late afternoon. I was instructed to play continuously during the dinner (a wedding anniversary) except when someone would stand up to make a speech. There were quite a few long speeches during the evening, so I didn't bother to ask for breaks.

One time, I stopped playing for about one minute, just to breathe and drink a sip of water, and the idiot-in-charge immediately came to me: "Play! Why aren't you playing?"

 

The atmosphere was nothing short of depressing. I was playing my repertoire of jazz standards, but I could have been playing nursery rhymes or anything else, as long as they could hear some 'pling-pling' in the background. Very often, in these cases I try to get some attention by some kind of virtuoso playing, and usually, I succeed to get some nice word, if not an applause, from some sensitive soul. But these people were so detached from everything that I just didn't bother and gave them what they wanted, which was wallpaper sound, thinking about something else for the whole night.

Several times, the nice-guy-in-charge advised me to lower my barely audible volume. There was no way that anybody from the tables could understand what I was playing.

 

If they had played records the whole night, at that volume, nobody could have detected a difference. Basically, I was there just to show to the people entering the hall that they had a pianist, too.

The part of the night that I enjoyed the most was the very brief snack/dinner, in the company of the waiters. Some of them were quite pleasant to talk with, and a couple knew something about jazz. They showed after dinner, to compliment me and to say things like, "man, what are you doing here?!" A nice, but sad, remark.

 

I was hungry as hell at that point, but nothing was left for me. Someone took pity and brought a bottle of water.

 

At one o' clock in the morning, after I had finished loading the car, the great-guy-in-charge had left the place, and someone who I had never seen came to me with a check that was for less money than the already shameful amount that we had agreed upon. I asked for explanations, and he just said, "I know nothing, you have to ask him". So I will be forced to run and phone and fight for my hard-earned money during the next few days.

 

Ten yers ago, I would have refused such a gig, unless it paid six times more than this one. I'm too tired now to reflect about that, but there's obviously something very wrong in all this.

Sorry for the vent.

 

 

Hi Marino, I am very sorry to read this - a man of your skills.

Now , what I would do is chase that S.O.B for your money ASAP , and present him with an invoice for your precious time lost and some fuel and food money as well. If he refuses to pay , write it off as a bad debt and claim amongst your expenses.

 

Brett

[wmp]

You really can't generalize. YMMV.

 

I worked for lots of rich folks when I was in the piano business. The majority of them were super nice folks. The Gandolfo family of Newton were suppliers to Italian restaurants. Mrs. Gandolfo would always feed the help like wedding guests.

 

Just to generalize about it, rich folks have paid me most of the money I've made. Generally speaking, it pays to be friendly with as many of them as possible.

 

I've had a steady stream of ***holes of every description this year, from welfare recipient parasite to multi millionaire parasite.

 

So beware of those rich folks and the poor folks too.

[The Wind]

for the OP sounds like the person to gripe about is the head caterer who was in charge. Was it he that told you to come an hour early and sit in the bedroom on your break?

 

He sounds like a power hungry wanna-be.

 

I'd be dealing directly with the homeowners, the people that actually cut your cheque.

 

Got myself a swanky solo piano gig tomorrow at a house party for a very well to do client. Got paid in full already so no worries there. Will report back after.

 

Like with all jobs, if you stand up for yourself you may pi*ss off people, and even get fired, but leave with your dignity.

[The Wind]

For any gig I've found a policy of 50% deposit up front works well. Or full payment before and give them a slight discount.

 

Getting paid on gig day seems to cause problems especially if it's a big event like wedding where people are running around crazy.

 

Luckily I haven't been burned by non-payment but I've had musician friends who have. Very awkward calling out the bride or groom for a cheque, or calling a client 10-20 times after they conveniently say it's in the mail, knowing full well they have no intention of paying.

[Jim Alfredson]

I would take a rich asshole over a club manager, any day...

 

My favorite Xmas story was when My band was booked for an Amnesty International Xmas party on Balboa Island. Now, I am a very liberal guy, but these people really freaked me out. When we arrived at this multi million dollar mansion we were greeted with "Look! It's the musicians from Los Angeles!'

 

We set up our gear and started playing. Everyone was really into the heavy blues swing we were playing. They screamed their affection at the end of our opening number, when the hostess came out and stopped us. She was carrying a large cardboard box with all these weird triangle shaped hats in it. She explains to everyone that they had to try on the hats so that they could harness the alpha waves being produced by the moon.

 

We started playing again, when two songs later she came out and stopped us again. "It's time for a poetry reading!" I am not kidding you! This strange looking modern beat nick and his girlfriend started reading poetry.

 

Meanwhile, my wife is laughing her head off when this guy with no shirt comes up to her. "Hey, you are cute... Who are you here with?" My wife explains that she is with the old bald guy on keyboards. "That's cool... My name is 'Blue', I am into body work". My wife answered that this was good as she just got into a car accident and needed some scratches removed from her car. The guy says, "No man, I am into BODY work!"

 

The evening ended with some interpretive dance that was ruined by a skipping CD. You could not have written this...

 

Awesome! Did you catch any of those alpha waves?

[dreamer65]

I think removing the catering watchdog layer will ease the pain sometimes. These guys feel responsible for banning the evil and sometimes they go overboard with that.

 

Unfortunately there seems no binding " minimum level of musicians support " definition for this business. Reminds me of the world Bach was born in.

 

BTW, great forum!

[ksoper]

A beautifully told tale, Dave. Hat's off to you for being the consummate professional.

 

I played the Cattle Baron's Ball in Houston with a package show of Major Country Artists. Even those guys were shown nothing but contempt.

 

Wishing everybody a new year filled with wonderful music and fewer idiots.

[Griffinator]

Like with all jobs, if you stand up for yourself you may pi*ss off people, and even get fired, but leave with your dignity.

 

Question is, how much is your dignity worth?