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How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
#3055272 07/22/20 05:30 PM
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I ask this question to people a lot, more often than not the answer is pretty out of the ordinary...but I'm surprised at how many involve music in some way, like meeting at a concert, having to sit next to each other in a random fashion and end up going home together, demoing a guitar at GC (!), etc.

Since most of the people here are involved in music, seemed like it might be a fun question to find out if the same is true of people here smile

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Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055277 07/22/20 06:13 PM
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A mutual friend suggested the woman I ended up marrying meet me at a bar where I would be playing in a covers band. And the mutual friend let me know, so I would know this person was someone I should potentially take seriously. So it was kind of like a set up, but with the mutual friend not wanting to be held responsible if things did not go well.

Shorter answer, when I am trying to be funny: "I met her in a bar".

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055279 07/22/20 06:20 PM
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That's cool! I guess that arranged marriages work sometimes smile

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055283 07/22/20 06:29 PM
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I grew up on the East Coast and in my 20’s was working with a band in Florida. I met someone there who offered me a long running gig in Vegas at Caesars. I took the gig, moved to Vegas, and met Linda pretty much as soon as I got here. She was working at the front desk there. We have 3 wonderful grandkids now. smile

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055286 07/22/20 06:54 PM
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i was playing in a band at a club. One night a group of girls came in, a couple of us sat down and we had a nice time talking and joking around. They were fun but I really wasn't especially attracted to any of them as a potential mate.

The next night the same group of girls came in but with an additional girl, who had the most beautiful smile in the world. We started talking and it seemed like we were old friends. She was a musician (still is), liked the same kinds of music, liked to travel (as I) do, liked the same kinds of books, loved the beach, and so on. 42 years later we're still together and I'm the luckiest guy in the world.

She sings like an angel, plays guitar and synth and is the other half of my duo. She is the kindest person I've ever known, has a great sense of humor, I could go on and on and on but I'll spare you a long list. She still has the most beautiful smile in the world.

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Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055293 07/22/20 07:12 PM
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Church. Great place to meet prospectives....

In the 70s as a Univ of Tx student, I attended a church that had some 100 or more other UT students also in attendance.

For a few years there it seemed like there was a wedding to attend about once a month on average.

I had a lot of wedding gigs.....here's a pic for to give you that unmistakable 70s instamatic vibe...

[Linked Image from i738.photobucket.com]


I'm the guy at the piano partially obscured by the Photobucket banner smile That good-looking guy two places over from me is Stephen Clapp - at the time he was concertmaster for the Austin Symphony and later was a member of the Beaux Arts Quartet and the Oberlin Trio, ending up as Dean Emeritus of Julliard. Wonderful violin player, wonderful man, passed in 2014.

WAY out of the league of all the rest of us...

nat

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055303 07/22/20 08:20 PM
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Somewhat long (and really two stories, but first leads to second):
I was the ultimate nobody in high school, a year younger than the others, living in a rural area, and without a driver's license when others had one. So my high school dating situation was close to non-existent. Fast forward through two marriages, neither of which survived. I had moved and become an active part of a home-based church in northeastern NC, was in the praise band with numerous instruments. Our (lady) pastor decided a bunch of us should take Ballroom Dance Lessons in Virginia Beach (really a surprise, we were a charismatic strong-on-Bible church). Anyhow, I started, and was a slow but consistent learner. This did help my meeting and going out a lot (much cheaper for students to practice together than with an instructor). I became reasonably proficient as a bronze level student, and was in the best physical shape of my life.
(side note: My 25th H.S. class reunion came up in this time - drove the car down to it, spent the whole evening dancing with the wives of all of the B.M.O.C. Lettermen that were sooooo popular in my school days, most of them showed the effects of way too much food and beer, and not enough exercise). One of the most enjoyable moments of life up to that time.

I was dancing a good bit with one lady student, and going out some in general. My wife, Wini started taking lessons, she improved a lot quicker than myself (she had some ballet in her early years). She had been fairly recently divorced under some rather harsh circumstances, moved 3/4 way across the US, worked as RN at Duke Hospital in NC, then moved to Virginia Beach to be with an old high school close friend and her husband.
She was NOT interested at all in any romantic involvement, but we went out 3 or 4 nights a week for months, developed a close friendship in a totally platonic relationship. We became close enough friends that she trusted me, and at that point, a romantic development began. We knew each other well by then, had shared a lot of our previous life's bumps along the way. Over a period of time, we reached a point for me to propose, and she accepted.

Our wedding was the very first event held in the new sanctuary of a church in the area, attended only by family and close friends. I actually sang and played at my own wedding, probably not very well, but it went over well. Hawaiian Wedding Song, still one of the prettiest slow romantic songs I know. That was in December, 1989. We are still together, and have a lifetime commitment. We both will be 79 within the next couple of months.

My main advice: It is a great help and blessing to become FRIENDS (in a real world sense) before romantic entanglements.
Have a blessed day.


Howard Grand|Hamm SK1-73|Kurz PC2|PC2X|PC3|PC3X|PC361; QSC K10's
HP DAW|Epi Les Paul & LP 5-str bass|iPad mini2
"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen."
Jim
Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055320 07/22/20 09:31 PM
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In 1993 I was girlfriend-less and my sister invited me to a tarot-reading evening at her friend's house. I was the lone male among eight or nine females.

One of the females stood out from the crowd. She was so pretty. And slim. And brunette. Just what I liked...and still do.

A few days later my match-making sis invited me to an evening of roller skating at a rink near Manchester, and she informed me that she would be there. So I went. And me and she ended up roller-skating together and holding hands. And it went from there.

Craig met the old girl (and me) in July 2013 in London.

So there you have it. Absolutely nothing to do with music!

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055323 07/22/20 09:45 PM
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Thx Craig for the OP - these stories are great - y'all keep them coming!

nat

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055334 07/22/20 10:27 PM
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We were high school sweethearts. I met my wife on my first day in high school. We went together for about 7 years and then got married .... 47 years ago. Couldn’t be happier. I guess she’s just not very discerning. 😁

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055355 07/22/20 11:47 PM
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I had moved to Chicago in 1989 to begin my residency at U. of Chicago. I was already a dedicated runner, and while running on the lakefront saw notices for the Lincoln Park Pacers Running Club, and joined. My future wife was a prominent member (editor of their newsletter); the club would meet at "the bulletin board" and do a 5-miler, then go to Brett's at the lakeside public golf course for coffee and muffins (this was the late 80's, after all). One October morning she blazed in, next thing I know she had sat across from me and started interviewing "the new guy." By January we were for all intents and purposes living together, and three weeks ago celebrated our 30th anniversary. Between the two of us we have run 21 marathons...

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Nowarezman #3055375 07/23/20 01:49 AM
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Originally Posted by Nowarezman
Thx Craig for the OP - these stories are great - y'all keep them coming!

nat

Agreed!! I love these smile

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055386 07/23/20 02:46 AM
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We both were members of a Tibet support organization. We did an event together, which was sort of a quasi-rave, then began hanging out and doing things together.

~~~~

This is the way I proposed to her.

I wanted it to be creative, and I wanted it to be a surprise. I thought since I'm a night photographer, "light writing" my proposal to her might be unique and fun.

This photo was created in New Year's Eve with Lisa helping out, not knowing that this was going to be a marriage proposal. I set up the camera, had her help out by lighting me with a flash, and used "light drawing" to write this message while the camera's shutter was open for this long exposure photo. I did this only once. Then I had her look at the LED in the back of the camera. She was very surprised! She said yes. I joked and said she had to "light draw" her answer.

See attached photo.

Attached Files 2870_kenlee_marriageproposal-lisa_lightpainting_181231_2243_69sf8iso200_D750_flat.jpg
1 member likes this: Joe Muscara
Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055392 07/23/20 04:10 AM
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I think that's a situation where making light of marriage is not only acceptable, but encouraged smile

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055409 07/23/20 12:05 PM
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I don't have a significant other. I'm too selfish. wink

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055443 07/23/20 04:47 PM
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Originally Posted by Anderton
I think that's a situation where making light of marriage is not only acceptable, but encouraged smile

Haha, you're quite punny!

Well, I wanted to propose in a way that felt like me.

Originally, I was going to do this out in the desert by a Joshua Tree. However, when we went out to Joshua Tree National Park, she wasn't feeling well and it was 40 degrees and windy. So yes, it was a few days later....indoors.

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055445 07/23/20 05:07 PM
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A gal that the drummer in one of my bands plays ball with brought her friend to one of our gigs. We kept staring at each other all night...me playing and her dancing. I got her number after the gig and we went on a "meet and greet" date that ended up lasting 4 hours. We went out again the next night and it went even better. That was 3 years ago, we're now living together.

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055604 07/24/20 06:40 PM
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It's complicated.......well no, not really!

I met my wife on match.com, our 4th anniversary is only a few days away.

In late 2015 the relatively long term relationship I'd been in had become irreconcilable and I decided to have a try with on-line dating. Initially it actually was a little complicated since I was still living in a mutually owned home with the ex. We got that sorted out soon enough and I bought another house that turned out to be a storage facility/practice space more than anything else.

I put a lot of thought into creating my profile because I wanted to be as honest and upfront as possible. I used my pseudonym GG Midi as a sort of code to indicate I was a musician. I was in a busy and popular local band at the time so I made mention of that commitment. I also made it clear that I was a fairly hardcore biker and had intentions to move away from the area after retiring. Soon the responses began rolling in......well, not exactly, but I was getting a few. The profile for my wife to be had never appeared for me but apparently my profile was popping up for her frequently she has stated and at some point she decided to message me. Her profile was vague and it was obvious she wasn't taking it very serious but her credentials were extremely impressive with post doctorate degrees and such.
We began text chatting and after a few weeks I'd weeded out most others and invited her to meet me for dinner. Things went well and the relationship developed from there. We had similar interests, ideas and a common sense of what is adventure and fun. She made it clear a little while into it that if the relationship was going to progress marriage would have to be involved so I caved and took the leap!

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055613 07/24/20 07:16 PM
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But who is number 1 ? ...
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Most of my relationships have begun with music in one form or another. My now ex-wife of a decade, I met at a DEVO concert (supported by Flock of Seagulls, Bow Wow Wow, and Animotion) in the middle of San Francisco near Halloween in the mid-noughties. I was covering it for Keyboard magazine, and it was literally an "across a crowded room" thing where we started circling each other and eventually struck up a conversation. When I learned she was (A) a sci-fi nerd, (B) an '80s kid, and (C) a medical doctor, I was like "Thank God, a smart person" and immediately pulled out the big guns: "Would you like to meet the bands? I have backstage passes." It was a fun, globe-trotting, high-flying relationship that got very good very quickly. Perhaps too quickly; the goody-two-shoes pediatrician loved having a rock-n-roll boyfriend. Until, that is, certain aspects of my lifestyle and habits got a little too rock-n-roll. She had her blind spots as well, but I can only take my own inventory, not someone else's.

Since making some radical changes and relocating to my home state of Vermont, I've connected with a literal best friend I've known since high school and been close with for at least the past 10 years. Music is involved there as well, as she is a gifted choral conductor (though she also does orchestras) and soprano. We'd planned on doing gigs by now together, but for Covid. In fact, our friendship turned to more as we were rehearsing for a Christmas gig we did this past December. We both found ourselves feeling a little shmoopy after trading lines from "Let It Snow" and she flat out looked at me and said, "This friend zone thing is kind of stupid at this point, isn't it?" The next night it was "What should we do for dinner, honey?" and has been most nights since. I've been in a handful of relationships where each partner dreamily looks at the other and asks, "Wow, why does it feel like we've known each other forever?" but until now, not one where the answer was, "Oh wait, we actually have." I recommend it.


"I'm just a confused musician who got sidetracked into this damned word business..." -Hunter S. Thompson

Stephen Fortner
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Senior Editor, Music Player Network
Former Editor in Chief, Keyboard Magazine

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
Anderton #3055730 07/25/20 08:12 PM
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I have not been lucky at love. Before marriage I had three girlfriends at school which were all very short relationships. Frankly I was awkward around girls and had no friends to guide me. The woman I used to be married to was someone I knew from college. I've had women at work show an interest but I could feel that something wasn't right; that feeling has never failed me when I learned later they were not good relationship material. Outside of work every woman I was introduced to through a mutual friend was either unattractive or not good relationship material.

I stay in shape and look attractive for my age; just haven't met the right woman yet. My marriage was a vast learning experience so I've been VERY selective.

Re: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?
BMD #3056307 07/29/20 06:24 PM
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Originally Posted by BMD
In 1993 I was girlfriend-less and my sister invited me to a tarot-reading evening at her friend's house. I was the lone male among eight or nine females.

One of the females stood out from the crowd. She was so pretty. And slim. And brunette. Just what I liked...and still do.

A few days later my match-making sis invited me to an evening of roller skating at a rink near Manchester, and she informed me that she would be there. So I went. And me and she ended up roller-skating together and holding hands. And it went from there.

Craig met the old girl (and me) in July 2013 in London.

And here we have proof...FWIW she looks even better in person. Unfortunately, Mark looks worse (kidding!!)

[Linked Image from i.imgur.com]


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