Ignatius Riley Posted October 15, 2002 Author Share Posted October 15, 2002 Want to play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me. I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter. Is that a ladder in your stockings or the stairway to heaven? You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away. You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy. Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more? I wish you were a door so I could slam you all day. Nice legs...what time do they open? Track or treat? http://www.garbage-house.com/pictures/freaks-images/eck-s-animated.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt.Hepworth Posted October 15, 2002 Share Posted October 15, 2002 Yeah man! LOL! Those are freak'n great :D ! No matter how good something is, there will always be someone blasting away on a forum somewhere about how much they hate it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rog Posted October 15, 2002 Share Posted October 15, 2002 "This face leaves in ten minutes ... be on it." "That's what the internet is for. Slandering others anonymously." - Banky Edwards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nawor Posted October 15, 2002 Share Posted October 15, 2002 How about this one for a knock back? A friends wife was being cornered by a drunken asshole during his bands gig at a bar about six years ago. This slob wouldn't get the hint he kept on and on trying to chat her up with his sniggering pals all standing around. He asked her if she had what it took to go out to his van in the car park. After looking him up and down and fluttering her eyes, she replied... "No thankyou Sir... one c*nt between my legs is quite enough!" His friends laughed so hard one of them pissed himself! :D "WARNING!" - this artificial fruit juice may contain traces of REAL FRUIT!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skip_dup1 Posted October 15, 2002 Share Posted October 15, 2002 Walk up and say, `hi, can you help me?` Then point to your package and say, `my clock`s broken-it needs a face and two hands on it...` Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spigotsaol.com Posted October 15, 2002 Share Posted October 15, 2002 Actually heard this at a party. "Do you have any Puerto Rican in you?" "Would you like some?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abnorm Posted October 15, 2002 Share Posted October 15, 2002 [QUOTE]Originally posted by Spoooooky Sylver: [QB]Bad pickup lines: Variation: "I don't know what it is, but you have the most startling eyes I have ever seen. (pause) Wanna fuck?" Another popular variation: Nice shoes. Wanna fuck? :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patrick_dont_fret Posted October 15, 2002 Share Posted October 15, 2002 Good old Veterinarian pickup lines: 18. "I've got a thermometer and a jar of Vaseline with your name on it, fuzzy butt!" 17. "I've been bad. Wanna rub my nose in it and spank me?" 16. "I think I'm going to have to put you down tonight." 15. "Whoa! Look at THOSE puppies!!" 14. "Of course I'm glad to see you ... I always piddle on the floor when I get excited." 13. "Your beak says no, but your tail feathers say yes!" 12. "If I look at you any longer, I'll have to put on a satellite dish collar to keep from licking myself raw." 11. "Can I do it doggie style?!? Hell, I have a doctorate!" 10. "If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hump my leg?" 9. "Give me a kiss! Give me a kiss! Who's the good girl?!? Yes, you are the very good girl!!" 8. "Hey, Baby, has this bar stool already been marked?" 7. "They say it's a dog-eat-dog world. Rrrrowff!" 6. "Is it warm in here, or are you in heat?" 5. "If I had a dog that looked like you, I'd shave its ass and make it walk backward -- to dinner and a movie." 4. "Oooh, your butt smells great -- is that Obsession?" 3. "Let's get out of this toilet and go get a real drink." 2. "...but that's 21 in dog inches!" and the Number 1 Pickup Line Used by Veterinarians... 1. "Baby, I feel a hose-spraying in our immediate future!" Yeah, some of them are kind of sick, but funny as hell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scraggs Posted October 15, 2002 Share Posted October 15, 2002 "hi, my name's scott, how do you like me so far?" lee has my vote for best lines... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ignatius Riley Posted October 15, 2002 Author Share Posted October 15, 2002 Some more suggestions: (Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself. You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions? If you were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public. Track or treat? http://www.garbage-house.com/pictures/freaks-images/eck-s-animated.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ikestr Posted October 15, 2002 Share Posted October 15, 2002 Nice dress....can I talk you out of it? the new and improved: 'married' ikestr ...hertz down low.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KenElevenShadows Posted October 16, 2002 Share Posted October 16, 2002 Bad ones...okeeeey... "Why don't you come sit on my lap and we'll talk about whatever pops up." Ken Lee Photography - photos and books Eleven Shadows ambient music The Mercury Seven-cool spacey music Linktree to various sites Instagram Nightaxians Video Podcast Eleven Shadows website Ken Lee Photography Pinterest Page Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Franknputer Posted October 16, 2002 Share Posted October 16, 2002 You know what would look really good on you? Me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mats Olsson. Posted October 16, 2002 Share Posted October 16, 2002 I do not mean to stop the fun, but, don't you got any nice one's to share? (not rude, just the good stuff that is tried & tested, proven to work?) /Mats http://www.lexam.net/peter/carnut/man.gif What do we want? Procrastination! When do we want it? Later! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KenElevenShadows Posted October 16, 2002 Share Posted October 16, 2002 Awww, now you're being serious? Where's the fun in that? I don't have lines. I've never picked up on enough women to develop lines that appear to work. I just listen and talk and show interest in what the person has to say and if I like the person and there seems to be some mutual chemistry, then ask if she wants to get together later -- usually something associated with what we've been talking about, and usually something casual and un-"date"-like (invented a new word!! Whoo-haa!). Seems to work. Uh, and if that doesn't work, I'll use the pick-up line I posted above!! Mwhoooo-hahahahah! ;) Ken Lee Photography - photos and books Eleven Shadows ambient music The Mercury Seven-cool spacey music Linktree to various sites Instagram Nightaxians Video Podcast Eleven Shadows website Ken Lee Photography Pinterest Page Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.