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about doubt


wraub

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So, here I am, a bass player with over 15 years as a player, almost 10 of those as a pro or semi pro, and I have reached THAT point. Yup, you guessed it, the place where I am ready to quit.

I won't (can't) quit playing and writing totally, but as a player, hauling gear and (maybe) getting paid, I am thinking I have had enough. Top that with the doubts and insecurities that I am sure most of us have, and I am thinking about a second desk job.

And then...

Last night, a guy I had played with for a while, out of the blue, is back in town and has a gig or two in line, and he calls me. Quite an ego boost for me, and at a good time as well, except for the fact that my regular job conflicts with the dates, and I had to turn him down. This is a good guy, with good material. A fair leader who pays fairly, and has even fed the band at researsals.

Anyway, as I am looking for someone to cover the gig, I am returning to the question at hand:

 

How long is too long to chase the dream? Is playing out necessary to a feeling of "worth" as a player, or is it possible for me to be content at home with a recorder and some ideas?

 

In this bold new world, it is surely possible to make a career out of making music by yourself, or with others, and never leave your home. So, I think this is where I am off to.

Perhaps it is the feeling of toting a gig bag and an amp through snow, up and down stairs and into cabs... Maybe when I go back out west and get to haul gear in my own ride, it will be different, but I have done that before.

Maybe I am just burnt out on the searching, tired of the idiots, posers, and crooks, and bored with myself. I don't know.

Perhaps I am the idiot (I am sure some here would back this possibility.)

 

Anyway, thanks for letting me vent. I am not sure what I am looking for by posting this... Validation, mockery, whatever. Maybe I am just feeling old today.

 

Thanks again.

 

Peace,

 

wraub

 

I'm a lot more like I am now than I was when I got here.

 

 

 

 

 

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We've all certainly heard that when playing bass, many times "Less is More."

The same can be said about nearly any aspect of life when things get too heavy, frustration sets in, routines get to be monotonous, and you just get burned out in general.

 

Take a step back and look at your time as a bass player, mark moments in your personal history when your excitement for playing was at an absolute pinnacle, and the times that you felt as you do now (with 15 years of going at it, I'm sure there are several occaisions to list in each category.)

 

Next, try to pinpoint the elements that made the best times the best, and the painfully mediocre times just so bland. If the problem lies in little or no excitement for playing, then chances are it's time for a change. Let's face it, you absolutely MUST be happy to be at the top of your game with regards to playing.

 

I have no idea what your current gigging situation is, but one thing that always seems to give me a new perspective on my playing and attitude about the game in general is playing with new people. I'm not saying to quit current bands/ensembles/etc., but maybe that's inevitable anyhow. What I'd suggest is to find the FUN again. Check out open jams, especially in music style that you're not as familiar with as you'd like to be. Play with friends, mix it up, and enjoy yourself with little or no regards to making money... if for nothing else to help you escape the scene, take a look from a different perspective, then reinsert youself into the music EXACTLY where you want to be.

 

Hope this helps at least a little. :)

-Mike

...simply stating.
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I think Mr M Pulsive is on a good tack there. So wraub what is your motivation? Are you doing it to get discovered? Or perhaps become famous? Or have your face on the cover your favorite bass player magazine. ;)

 

I'd urge you find what was fun about playing. What was not fun. And do a little self-analysis. Nothing wrong with that and it doesn't cost you anything. I myself am finding that being busy doesn't always equal fun. I gave up on the playing in bar and club scene years ago. I currently play in church and with a Christian Outreach Band. I find both satisfying. Different styles of gospel but interesting. I was getting a little disgusted in playing with outreach band. I was just not feeling some of the songs. I am in the midst of doing some self evaluation too. I realized a long time ago that I am NOT in this for the money (there ain't none) for me it is ministry.

 

Just my .02 cents

RobT

 

Famous Musical Quotes: "I would rather play Chiquita Banana and have my swimming pool than play Bach and starve" - Xavier Cugat

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I play for the fun of it. If it ever became a job I'd be very dissappointed. I already have a 'real' job. Bass has become my creative outlet. Gigging is part of that outlet. Playing a show be it covers or otherwise and seeing people having a good time to your atmosphere is the fun of what we do as musicians.

Double Posting since March 2002

Random Post Generator #26797

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Originally posted by wraub:

In this bold new world, it is surely possible to make a career out of making music by yourself, or with others, and never leave your home.

Well, this seems like it might have some holes in it.... While you have talent and a good work ethic, I don't think the world has gotten so that this is still true. I think it still takes some luck to make a living at this. Jeremyc, for all his talent and work, has probably had some luck...

 

But let's be clear. If you are a "bass player" (and I think you are), it's what you ARE, not what you do.

 

Mike's suggestions above make sense to me.

 

Good luck

Tom

www.stoneflyrocks.com

Acoustic Color

 

Be practical as well as generous in your ideals. Keep your eyes on the stars and keep your feet on the ground. - Theodore Roosevelt

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Yeah, Tom, Mike has a few great ideas there, and you are right that I am a bass player, for sure.

Mike, thanks for the advice. Sensible and sound.

Rob T, it is not about fame or world wide acceptance for me, but I would not mind at least being able to eat on what music pays me. But of course, that is not what making music is about.

I do notice that the concept of fun has appeared more than once here, and that may be part of my problem.

But it is not always possible to make your job fun, and as I have been trying to approach my "music career" more as a professional occupation, and less as a fun avocation, I may have already screwed the pooch on this.

Scotty, you are definitely right that the playing part, the actual couple of hours playing, is the best part. I guess my dilemma is in the weighing of those couple of hours against the mass of the remainder, i.e. the crooks, idiots, and posers alluded to earlier.

Again, maybe I just need to find the fun again, maybe I just need to start those underwater joinery classes at the tech school, I don't know.

Again, maybe I am just tired.

 

Thanks all, much help.

 

Peace,

 

wraub

 

I'm a lot more like I am now than I was when I got here.

 

 

 

 

 

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I think most of us go through some time of doubt.

 

I quit playing full-time in '84. The business was changing, as was my personal life. I focused on working on original projects with players I liked, and music I enjoyed playing.

 

When I moved to FLA 11 years ago, the music 'scene' was saddening, to say the least. I stopped playing out, altogether, for 9 years.

 

Now, I play every weekend. I work with people I like, and play music I enjoy. Certainly this is no path to Stardom, but I'm having fun.

 

There's a recurring theme here, and it's been echoed by all on this thread: First, and foremost, you need to enjoy, and play in fun/creative situation. Play because you want to...

 

Chances are (why do I hear Johnny Mathis in my head?), if you're not having fun, the audience (large or small) isn't either.

 

As others have said...sit back, take inventory, and figure out what makes the difference to YOU!

 

Best of Luck!!

JBFLA

Jim

Confirmed RoscoeHead

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I do play music for a living. And I do it because I enjoy playing music. I like playing bass with people, not with everybody, but most of the time.

 

I also play music because I have to. I didn't choose to be a musician, music chose me.

 

We all have periods of self-doubt and depression. There are lots of flakes everywhere in every field.

 

It's ok to take a break for a while, then when you play with people again, you will regain some of your enthusiam.

 

Meanwhile, yes you can write and compose on your computer and then you will have something you will want to play with people.

 

Best wishes to you.

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Bear with me here.....

 

Back in the early 80s in VERY rural northeast Hungary (no running water just as well, no electricity, just oil lamps and wood stoves, no indoor plumbing, just an outhouse), my grandmother passed away in hospital.

 

She fell while working on her family farm, tending the vegetables. She broke her hip, and the lousy medical care there was "officially" deemed responsible for her passing.

 

She was 92 when she passed.

 

Relatives and neighbors all said she died of inactivity and loss of purpose, being away from what she loved doing (farming and caring for her neighbors, sharing her food with them).

 

She was in very good health before being hospitalized, rarely ill even in her old age. Her speech, her mental faculties, even her eyesight, would be the envy of any middle aged North American!

 

I mention this because she actually loved what she was doing with her life, even though it was hard work every day (I know...I lived there for a number of months, working on her farm, feeding the animals, hauling the hay, driving the wagons, hauling and pulling vegetables to the root cellar).

 

Stopping and "taking it easy" was never in her mind. Why? She loved feeling useful, doing something she truly loved.

 

These days, whenever I feel my own doubts (which is often in these difficult times), working in QC and repair in applications of (in my opinion, useless and disposable) technology and attempting to pursue SOME kind of musical career, sorting between insane drug addict guitarists or posers, I think back to her, and the lesson she taught me just by how she lived and loved what she was doing, every day.

 

Like I mentioned, retirement was never something she even considered.....strong and independent, full of the love of life and love of her purpose. Sure, she really slowed down, and she had to nap regularly. She only weighed about 90 pounds. She couldn't do HEAVY lifting like she used to, but you just try taking that sack of Turnips from her, you'll find out how strong she still is!

 

That's something we're missing, I think, as a people: a love of purpose. I also believe that our loss of love for our purpose is responsible for the majority of stress and preventable disease in our society, since it leads to behaviour and habits which are unhealthy.

 

I don't want to end up continually working in a job I hate, till retirement, then find myself at 65 with nothing to love or show for it.

 

As a rule of thumb, I ask myself what it is that I want to be doing when I'm 60? 70? 80? Retired? Idle? Or just plain away from what I know I love?

 

No....that option has never been in the cards.

 

If I have my choice, I'll keep on working as long as humanly possible, doing what I love (in my case, music). I may never be a star (to be honest I don't want to be anyways) but I do want to live life to the fullest, doing what I love, up to the very end. God willing, when I die, it will be either in my sleep or with my bass in my hands.

 

So whenever I feel doubts, I think of my grandmother and her life, and that gives me the strength to persevere against what seems like overwhelming odds and more importantly, my own self doubts.

 

PS: I read an interview from Stomping Tom Connors recently, and his outlook is the same as my late grandmother's.

Beware the lollipop of mediocrity; one lick and you suck forever.
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Originally posted by GeorgeR:

Bear with me here.....

 

Back in the early 80s in VERY rural northeast Hungary (no running water just as well, no electricity, just oil lamps and wood stoves, no indoor plumbing, just an outhouse), my grandmother passed away in hospital.

 

She fell while working on her family farm, tending the vegetables.

GeorgeR - Great post!...just a damn great post. Thanks!

JBFLA

Jim

Confirmed RoscoeHead

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Hey George, personally I think you can send your grandmother story to Chicken Soup for the Soul series. It think a lot of people need this, not only this forum. A lot of marriage problem because losing the passion and the first love.

 

We need to have zeal/passion in anything we do.

 

Good thought indeed!

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Great posts so far. Read this song carefully:

 

The Secret of Life

 

"Well the secret of life is enjoying the passage of time

Any fool can do it

There ain't nothin' to it

Nobody knows how it got to the top of the hill

But since we're on our way down

We might as well enjoy the ride

 

The secret of love is in opening up your heart

It's okay to feel afraid

But don't let it stand in your way, No now

Cuz everyone knows that love is the only road

And since we're only here for awhile

We might as well show some style

Give us a smile now

 

(Chorus)

Isn't it a lovely ride?

Sliding down and

Gliding down

Try not to try too hard

It's just a lovely ride

 

The thing about time is that time isn't really real

It's all on your point of view

How does it feel to you in there and

Einstein said that you could never understand it all

Planets spinning through space

The smile upon your face

Welcome to the human race

 

(Chorus)

 

Isn't that a lovely ride,

Oh la la yes

See me sliding down and gliding down

Try not to try too hard

It's just a lovely ride

 

Now the secret of live is enjoying the passage of time...

 

One of James Taylor's greatest songs. I would like to add one more secret...the secret to happiness.

 

I don't really mind what each of you feel about religion...whether you fall into some category of faith or lack of faith. However, I have learned a lesson from faith.

 

The secret of happiness is service. We are creatures who have been designed with a need to serve each other. (Biblically, this is taught by Christ washing the disciples feet.)

 

Think of the Red Cross volunteer, the soup kitchen volunteer, the lady at the hospital who comes in and sits with sick babies. Those that I have met, busy as they are, are the happiness people I know.

 

In our materialistic world, we are assaulted with the notion that we should be takers...so we begin taking "our share," or more than our share. And we are never filled.

 

It's only when we become givers that we begin to fulfill that need put in us.

 

Why do you think I teach?

 

I'm not so concerned with whether a band or musical event is gonna "make it" or even fulfill me personally. I want to play moving music for the audience and fellow bandsmen...giving a bit of myself away each time.

 

I too make my living full time off of music...although much of my income is from teaching music. I gig quite often as well...take home nice checks that make me giggle.

 

But I play for free several times a month. And I love it.

 

Music is the gift you've been given. Give it away, and find joy.

"Let's raise the level of this conversation" -- Jeremy Cohen, in the Picasso Thread.

 

Still spendin' that political capital far faster than I can earn it...stretched way out on a limb here and looking for a better interest rate.

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All of you provide some great advice. I've been debating posting this for a while, but, I have found that I have lost the drive to play. The music scene around here is decent, yet it is so cutthroat and chock full of mediocre and wishy washy people. I am not like that nor do I want to associate myself with that. There just aren't that many good players around here. I've gotten bored with studio work. I loved it at first, now, I find I'm playing the same bass line (figurativly) for each session. All of the sessions have become dead. It's just me and the sound guy and MAYBE the producer. The numbers are written out for me with the time signature, drums and scratch guitar/piano in the headphones. I haven't done a session in a week and I haven't practiced in 2 months. I've just lost my desire. It could be that I've been unemployed for 8 months and Wal Mart won't hire me because I have a college degree and I failed the personality profile for a grocery store and I made too much money in 2001 to get a loan or grant for school. Life hasn't been too great for me, but, I'm fine in that aspect. It doesn't bother me. What bothers me is losing my passion for something I have loved for the last 15+ years. But, it's not just playing, it's music, in general. I'm not trying to pull a "poor me, everybody look at me" type of thing. I'm just saying, "I'm right there with you." Life has her strange twists. Sometimes it takes a little time off to renew the spark. I'm hoping that time off for me isn't too long.
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Man, this is one touching thread.

 

wraub - I hope this is just a season of reflection for you. I know the passion will come back eventually.

 

GeorgeR - Words cannot express the way your post made me feel. Lotta lessons in your post.

 

davebrownbass - :thu:

 

cornbread - Sounds like you and and wraub are in the same place. I hope this is just a season for you too! This too shall pass.

 

Retaining the fire and passion. In all facets of life this is our desire.

RobT

 

Famous Musical Quotes: "I would rather play Chiquita Banana and have my swimming pool than play Bach and starve" - Xavier Cugat

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I think these posts suggest that the driving force behind losing interest in music are people and the "business" which is all created by the same "people" who ever they are. Sometimes I've found when you have something that gives you strength there are plenty of folks out there who want to take it away from you, sometimes because they don't understand it, sometimes because they are jealous. Maybe because they have something that works for them and they cannot acknowledge that there could be anything else out there.

 

Either way it's my personal feeling that I will not let anyone take something like that away from me. Just as a prime example of the responses on this board there are tons of people out there who feel the same way that we do when it comes to music. The key is to find those people. Now that is a tall order for sure. I have never found the perfect situation but perfection is unattainable right? So we compromise and find enjoyment where we can the best we can.

 

My goodness.....I've just waxed philosophical!!!

 

Peace

Double Posting since March 2002

Random Post Generator #26797

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Underwater joinery sounds pretty cool to me. :thu:

 

You'll always be a playa, brutha wraub. No worries there. Sounds like you need a breather or a change of pace to get thru this "season," as RobT described it.

 

Perhaps an NYC model F Bass or a Tokyo Sadowsky would bring you out of the doldrums? Nothing like some new gear to reignite the passion and boost credit card debt! ;)

 

I don't mean to make light of your situation (and you know that :) ). Live for the moment, enjoy what each day brings, and maybe follow some of the suggestions the others have thrown out. Take a break from the bass and lavish some extra attention on your wife, building up the overall fulfillment in your life.

 

If all else fails, you live in the most vibrant city in the world. Grab a seat on a bench in Central Park with a really good, thick deli sandwich, and people-watch with open ears and open eyes. You might need to wait, though, until more of the snow is gone.

 

Peace.

spreadluv

 

Fanboy? Why, yes! Nordstrand Pickups and Guitars.

Messiaen knew how to parlay the funk.

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Originally posted by wraub:

Maybe I am just burnt out on the searching, tired of the idiots, posers, and crooks, and bored with myself.

wraub ... some responses:

 

1. It's important for me to feel like I'm "plugged in" to a community of people who are both good people and good musicians. So, I get discouraged when I feel like I'm isolated from other musicians I really respect and admire. There have been times (i.e. music school) where I was surrounded by great musicians, who were not necessarily people I respected or admired ... and other times I've been surrounded by people I liked but who weren't great musicians. Anyway, if this seems to describe you, perhaps hibernating in your house with a computer is not a great way of remedying - how about finding a kick-butt teacher (Ron Carter was teaching a friend of mine here in NYC; I also know a really great player who I've thought about studying with myself).

 

2. It's good to get strokes, and to get energy from gigs. Conversely, it sucks to feel you're playing your guts out and getting little more than the $ out of it. Particularly true if the $$ are barely enough to cover the costs of strings + studio space + gear, not to mention rent and groceries, etc. I really believe you need ONE gig on your slate that you are doing just FOR YOURSELF, and not for the bread or the career. This way, you don't feel like it's only about a job. Some folks are able to get joy out of playing, no matter what they're playing ... other people just HAVE to play ... I'm not that way - I don't HAVE to play; frankly, if I don't have a gig I'm getting something back from (energy, creativity, players that kick my butt), I'm an unhappy camper, which makes me less of a pro on other gigs.

 

3. I know (and you do to, I'm sure ) that I go through periods of feeling really down on my own playing ... just like athletes who slump, and artists who lose the "muse" - my experience has been that it's pretty much inevitable that I'm going to have ups and downs. And this is where a bit of discipline is really important ... stripping back the layers of doubt and rationalizing and excuses, and toughening up and practicing, facing weaknesses, etc. Woodshedding in the best of ways. So ... I guess I'd wonder whether you're facing one of those typical "blue" periods, when a kick in your ass would be a good thing (i.e. lessons, hard-ass practicing, doing some auditions, etc.), or whether this is something different. And frankly, you'd be the one to know the answer to that one.

 

4. Finally, maybe it's less about the blues or the strokes, or the community, and maybe it's actually boredom. In which case, I'd say by all means dig into the production and sequencing at home ... but the only thing is that I'd avoid thinking of this as an "end" to bass playing or that you're "giving up" something - it's doing what good musicians do. Enrich your musicianship by expanding beyond what you know. Jaco, Larry Klein, Will Lee, Pino, John Leventhal - all these guys (and hundreds others) have done the same thing ... point is that of course being a bass player is not the sum total of all musicianship, and it's a great thing for any player to broaden beyond bass playing ...

 

- gotta run, but I thought I'd throw this down rather than let this thread get cold ...

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I'm just coming out of something like a slump. I didnt practice for about a month and it bored me when I did play. Of course I dont have a band and I dont gig but I did play every day for at least an hour. but for some reason the fun went away. I've just gotten out of it and i'm playing everyday again. I decided I wanted to learn how to play "Pure Imagination" from willy wonka and I think thats what got me out of it.

 

Give it time and you'll want to play and you will with a new approach and much more passion .

"Cliff Burton (the "Major rager of the 4-string mother f***er", from Metallica)" Direct quote from Wikipedia (censored out of respect for the forum)
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I might be off-base here, but:

take a break for a while... I did, (for a whole lot longer than I intended, unfortunately,) and when I got back into music, it had a lot more meaning, and I seemed to jump into it with more feeling and enthusism than I ever had before...

Granted, 10 years is a LONG time... I wouldn't recommend that but do what your heart tells you... if you need to take a break from the grind for a while, do it. Your soul will thank you later when you return with a new heart.

Just an idea... the other posts before me may be more on the mark for you, I don't know...

DX

Aerodyne Jazz Deluxe

Pod X3 Live

Roland Bolt-60 (modified)

Genz Benz GBE250-C 2x10

Acoustic 2x12 cab

 

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davebrownbass-

In our materialistic world, we are assaulted with the notion that we should be takers...so we begin taking "our share," or more than our share. And we are never filled. It's only when we become givers that we begin to fulfill that need put in us.

 

Why do you think I teach? I'm not so concerned with whether a band or musical event is gonna "make it" or even fulfill me personally. I want to play moving music for the audience and fellow bandsmen...giving a bit of myself away each time.

Excellent!!! Thank you for posting that! I find that my music, for me, is the strongest connection to my core, the little boy inside me who just wants to be happy and play to others, without counting the cost, and represents what you have just posted.

 

You religious parallel I found interesting.....years ago I seriously considered entering a ministry full time (I won't mention which religion), but various circumstances prevented me from doing this anyway.

 

Then I learned advice from an elder in this ministry who understood what I was wanting, advice which has been echoed from my time spent in the far north among the Innu and particularly a couple of wise old First Nations chiefs and different spiritual leaders (most of whom are old women, as is the custom among First Nations people).

 

This was from a non-First Nations minister among the Natives in the north:

 

"We all have our own kind of service to our fellow human beings, to all people and to God, so don't worry about being unable to copy someone else if they appear to be doing something good. Just continually work to discover how to be the best YOU that you can be."

 

And this, from a village elder:

 

"Don't be afraid to share the best of YOU with others. The Creator put that IN you to share with others, to help you LOVE others, so they may give back to, and love, others as well. This makes the community strong when people are UNAFRAID to share. When confronted with highly negative and destructive people and habits (*remember the tale of two wolves, he asks me?), remember you are only human too, so have disciplined compassion. Above all, learn to listen and think with your heart. Learn to be a GOOD listener because 99% of all problems can be solved with just listening with an understanding heart."

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Playing music involves heartfelt listening, creating, sharing, all aspects of humane emotions, good for feeding the "good wolf" inside of us. I sincerely think that we're all musicians at heart, just some of us have better DNA and talent for it.

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------

*The tale of two wolves, as I learned it up north, goes something like this.

 

"An old Grandfather told this tale to his grandson, who came to him with anger at a person who had done him a great injustice...

 

Let me tell you a story. I too, at times, have felt great hate for those who have taken so much, with no regret for what harm they inflict. But hate wears you down, and does not hurt your enemy. It's like taking poison and wishing your enemy to die. I have struggled with these feelings many times, all of my life. They do not diminish as I grow older. But I have learned much through the struggle. Let me share what I have learned with you, so you may profit from my experience.

 

It is as if there are two wolves inside me; one is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him and does not take offense when no offense was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so, and in the right way.

 

But...the other wolf?

 

The littlest thing will send him into a fit. He fights everyone, always, without end, and without reason. He cannot think straight because his anger and hate are so great. It is useless rage and anger, for his anger will change nothing. At times it feels impossible to live with these two wolves inside me, for both of them try to take control of my spirit. And there are times when I am so weak, when it feels like the struggle will be over, for only one wolf can win. The other must die.

 

The boy looked intently into his Grandfather's eyes and asked: Which one wins, Grandfather?

 

The Grandfather smiled and quietly said: The one I feed."

 

Moral: Be sure you pay close attention to which wolf YOU feed, and be sure to offer good "food" for the good "wolf" within others as well.

Beware the lollipop of mediocrity; one lick and you suck forever.
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This topic comes at an appropriate time. I'm in a slump, kind of a funk even...my current band is practically dead in the water, we haven't practiced in weeks or even communicated. The two founding members--lead guitar and singer/rhythym guitar--had never been in a band before, though they're in their late 30's or early 40's, and they haven't been able to keep focused.

 

So at this stage I guess I'm ready to to hunt for another band, but the band-hunting experience generally sucks. I'm trying to stay optimistic but that can be difficult.

 

The main thing that seems to help me when I'm in these "in-between" times, is to try to accomplish something. Maybe musically, like maybe charting some new songs, or sometimes it's refining my equipment so that I'll be better prepared for the next opportunity. For example, the last few days I've been assembling a padded aluminum suitcase to carry my BP-8 effects pedal and associated cords. When I do start gigging again this kind of stuff can really help.

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Many kind and helpful words from many kind and helpful people. Much thanks.

I think that the general tone here about fun, about doing it for yourself, and about the need to play with other musicians in new situations is spot on.

I also think that, as Music Man said, this may be one of those "typical blue periods" requiring a kick in the ass.

Since posting this the other day, I lucked into a long term loan of a Charvel 4 string, and just the change from my usual 5 string made me think up new things.

Cornbread and I do indeed seem to be in a similar way. Obviously, though, I am just in a slump, and the helpful advice here, along with Ben Loy's recent post about improving your playing, is trying to direct me away from the "locked down in front of a computer" method.

I have a few books that I have been neglecting, and I know of a teacher or two. I think I am going to pursue those routes, just because. After all, I can still do the sequencing thing, just for the heck of it.

Best of luck, cornbread.

 

Anyway, my thanks again to all of you for your help.

...Still the best bass forum online.

 

Peace,

 

wraub

 

I'm a lot more like I am now than I was when I got here.

 

 

 

 

 

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so i went to rehearsal tonight in a bad mood. the weather sucked and had sucked all week. i felt down in general. i was thinking of quitting this band, selling my amp and moving to south bend.

 

then i get to rehearsal. i have a headache. there is just two guitar players and a singer. i try to keep everyone in time but no one is paying attention and it's getting ugly. people almost seem to be playing different songs when they're not soloing. after the drummer arrived we locked and i had a good time for a few hours.

 

this just happened to me tonight and i thought i'd share. but i did spend a good portion of the last few weeks wondering why i was in a band. i have no intentions of being a rock star, i just enjoy playing. for the past four months i've been either not playing or not enjoying it. i also just found out that after 4 months of not rehearsing the songwriters booked a show... an acoustic set. just them. on the night of my birthday party.

Eeeeeehhhhhhhhh.
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We all go through periods of reflexion and self evaluation. That's how we make great changes in our lives...and in the world.

 

When playing becomes a chore, you need such a change. No problem.

 

It's much more important, after periods of personal discovery, that we remain people who communicate a message of love, peace, harmony, personal surrender and sacrifice. Whether we do such a thing on a stage with a bass in hand, in a classroom or in the breakroom of a Fortune 500 company. It doesn't matter.

 

As I said before...the secret to happiness is service. If your playing is "self-serving" it it pretty easy to grow tired of that. If you are banding with others who are self-serving...even if you are not, it's even easier to grow weary.

 

But if everything you do in your life, from playing bass to painting your garage, is only a reflection of a self-examined spirit dedicated to serving others, your ennui will disappear.

"Let's raise the level of this conversation" -- Jeremy Cohen, in the Picasso Thread.

 

Still spendin' that political capital far faster than I can earn it...stretched way out on a limb here and looking for a better interest rate.

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  • 2 years later...
Originally posted by wraub:

I am not sure what I am looking for by posting this... Validation, mockery, whatever.
Ooooh... well, here I am.

 

I know this is an old thread, but if you still feel this way, I am interested in that new Jazz of yours. ;)

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Interesting bump with the "Am I ready to give it up" thread going as well. I'm feeling that as well. It's SO HARD to keep going when people only seem interested in crap music. When we lost our jazz gig, I started to get the "why try" feeling. We still have the pop/rock/acoustic band which is fun, but even there we "have to" play certain tunes. It's not bad as I like the guys I play with, but even that will change in a few months as they leave to pursue advanced degrees and their chance at fame in the big city. We'll have to get some group therapy going to get us all through this rough time.
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Well, hello, wraub of badmoods past. Wraub here.

 

Weird to see this, like a specter, drawn up from the dank recesses of the MP servers.

At any rate, rest assured all that I am in a better place at the moment. I have found outlets for my musical, uh, output, and I am content for now. Besides, the new job keeps be too busy for anything else.

Actually, it's nice as a reminder of how far I have come since then, the Wally aside.

 

Be strong, my brethren.

Though the valleys may approach, the peaks are but another step beyond. But...

It's about the walk.

 

Peace,

 

wraub

 

Maury, I'll think about it. I guess we could talk a trade for the Lull, but... I do really like my Jazz.

We'll talk.

 

:)

 

I'm a lot more like I am now than I was when I got here.

 

 

 

 

 

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Thanks for all these contributions. New Year is a perfect time to re-assess one's goals and one's life. I find that after working in the same company for 7 years I become stale. No-one else notices, but I do. This has happened to me twice now and I guess I am a believer in changing your surroundings from time to time. Take a break

 

Davo

"We will make you bob your head whether you want to or not". - David Sisk
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