Band Delema

[Mike Bear]

Because of the sad news of the passing of John a.k.a 44Hurts, I didn't really have a chance to post about this news.

 

4 1/2 years ago, I started a band called Artisan with 2 other long time friends. One left the band about a year and a half ago to play a different style of music. We are still on amazing terms. He's a true bro. We luckily replaced him with an old bandmate of mine from high school. Things have been good. With the exception of the other original remaining member.

 

Showing up late, clashes when song writing, and just a lack of output as a band member have been all huge frustrations that have led to us considering letting her go. Over the past year, she has had a problem with her right thumb. It's from bad and tense technique. She never listened to her peers or people she admired about this dilemma. It worsened. She went to many doctors. It's gotta be really sad and frustrating at the prospect of not playing ever again. Also, as time has passed on, I don't think she had the same long term goals as us. So after 2 months of not playing, she came to us. Offered to help out here and there, or leave the band.

 

We sat down with her last Sunday and we let her go. In a sense we were relieved we did it because of her hand and not the personality issues. It kinda saved a messy split. Though I do feel bad for her hand. Hard lesson to learn.

 

So she asked for one last request. A farewell show. We had one last show for our last guitarist and she's using it as a comparison. The difference was, the show our last guitarist played was a big show, he offered to help and not leave us high and dry. Plus he didn't stop playing.

 

The story of my band is, we have a history of either not being able to multitask, or multitasking too much. We have not gotten a proper recording out. That has been the preparation mode we've been in for quite a few months. And were close. The remaining drummer and guitar player want to play the show because it's an excuse to play. I owe a lot of gratitude to this guitarist who we've parted ways with. I took her aside and tried to explain how important she will always be to the band. But I don't believe we owe her to stop our progress in it's tracks to put on a show. Actually I do the whole business end. Everyone else just has to show up and play. So it's a bit easier for anyone else to take a show in the band. The whole reason we have no recording is because we kept taking shows.

 

I love playing, but I'm very frustrated and came very close to leaving myself. A band that I love very much and playing with people I enjoy playing with. I just thought after this amount of time the work ethic wasn't all on one plane. Something was a miss.

 

The rest of the band has left me with "We can tell her no farewell show, but it's going to be because you don't wanna do it".

 

Not only do I have productivity fears but a few personal ones. I think we've wasted enough time on this guitarist. We should be released of her grasp. She's not raging tyrant. I don't hate her. I just don't really respect her as a bandmate. She really held some projects hostage with lazyness, and a touch of selfishness.

 

Any how, I think this turned into a venting session. Sorry folks.

 

I left off telling them, we'd do a show if they wanted to. After all, we've done plenty of shows that I didn't wanna take. Not cause I don't love playing. I'm not the only one in the band. Another issue is, I don't think she's very smart for wanting to rehearse for a Show and play one. Especially after not playing at all for a few months. Plus, her thumb is no better. It's just not smart. I will make exceptions, like opening for larger bands. I told my band mates, we'd ask someone to fill in with that situation, someone who's up on their playing. We have so much to do. The remaining guitarist has to learn all the 2nd guitarists parts for our album and auditioning future replacements. We have 2 more songs to write. We wanted to hit the studio next month.

 

Well, thanks for reading. There's a better chemistry between the remaining members. We are all pretty hard core.

[Grant Sharkey]

Sounds tricky man.

 

Organising one show wouldn't be too much strain - but if you can't rely on her getting on with it and making sure it's a good one for her to go out on - it's going to be a waste of time.

 

Concentrate on the recording and maybe when you're back in the gigging frame of mind - have her back as a special guest - or something - might be the better way to do it.

 

Hope it all works out man.

[EddiePlaysBass]

Couldn't you like do a "tribute" show, where some other people play her parts? On the downside : that demands extra work and preparation ...

 

All I can say is the best of luck, this seems like a really tricky situation

 

Ps: Will the album sound anything like those demo's on your website? Cos if it does, I'm placing an order right here - right now

[Mike Bear]

Sharkey, I think your right. We are guessing we'd have a replacement sooner than the time came to delay a farewell show. I'd like to quote Apocalypse Now. "Don't get off the boat, don't ever get off the boat". I think we have our groove with writing going, we should keep writing.

 

Eddie, thanks for the kind words on the demo. We were so unsatisfied with that thing. We didn't press it, just offered it up for free on the web. We are the same style, but hopefuly the songs are a bit better cause some time has passed. Our big problem with the demo was the sound. But we won't blame the recording too much. Like they say "A poor craftsman blames his tools". I'm looking forward to re-recording those songs and some new ones. Also my doom side project is coming along well. I'm going to add some songs to that so I can try to make it a full lenght for licensiing.

[73 P Bass]

Have her do the leg work; she wants on final show, she can book it.

When my last band broke up( the drummer quit and we decided not to continue), we still had gigs booked. Since I did all the booking, I decided to cancel the gigs.

I gave the club owners plenty of notice. I didn't want to give them a half-assed show, where the drummer's heart wasn't into it, and I was the only one to bring a crowd.

[bc_dup1]

I agree. Just say to your guitarist and bandmates, "OK, you guys want to play a show, go ahead and make it happen. I will be more than glad to rehearse and play, but it's your baby".

 

If you are usually the guy who gets things done, there's every chance it will never happen. But this way, no-one can blame you. And if it does happen, at least you haven't wasted too much of your own time and energy on a project you don't have much enthusiasm for.

[Steve Force]

Originally posted by Grant Sharkey:

Sounds tricky man.

 

Organising one show wouldn't be too much strain - but if you can't rely on her getting on with it and making sure it's a good one for her to go out on - it's going to be a waste of time.

 

Concentrate on the recording and maybe when you're back in the gigging frame of mind - have her back as a special guest - or something - might be the better way to do it.

 

Hope it all works out man.

What Grant said.

[Mike Bear]

I got an email from a club today saying it was looking pretty good for a larger show with some bigger bands. At least bigger in the metal scene. I wrote my band and told them, if we get on that show we wouldn't use our old guituarist. It would be negigable of us to knowingly put someone up on stage who is completely out of shape. We play pretty athletic music. You can't just get up and strum a few chords. Hopefuly they won't react sour. We've had offers time and time again from two very good guitar players to help us out if we were in a bind and good show was coming up. It's nice to know we are loved.

[Cup_dup1]

Mike I've been wondering how the rest of the band feels about this last gig? Are they only happy to go along with itsince they only have to turn up and play? If so, and you're the one who'll be taken away from writing, then don't do the gig.

 

In a previous life I was the asshole who sacraficed time and energy to buff others egos. I've toughened up. If the exiting guitarist wants a fanfare, show her the the nearest shopping precinct, tell her to busk for applause!

 

Recent happenings here at the lowdown have shown us that everyone's time is limited! In the nicest possible way, serve yourself whislt keeping others' hurt to a minimum.

 

Best of luck with the the recording!

[moot]

In a previous life I was the asshole who sacraficed time and energy to buff others egos. I've toughened up. - Cup

I gotta go with Cup here.

I have played many gigs that I didn't want to do for various reasons. Whether because the money isn't right, you know the band isn't ready, etc. Usually though, it's because the guitarist just wants to play to stroke his ego.

Now, I won't even do a song live unless I know it well and it has been rehearsed. I don't believe in risking my rep for someone elses ego. I think it is counter productive to everyone involved (myself especially) and one bad show can take a long time to recover from not just mentally for you, but in the local music scene as well. Sure you're gonna know it wasn't you screwin' up the tune but do you think the crowd will know? The last thing you want to hear is "I heard you guys kinda sucked the other night."

 

Stick to your guns dude. Play for you.

[Mike Bear]

Well, I got an email from the remaining guitarist. He said his answer for doing the show has swayed to a "NO". He pretty much said, with time to think he will not do a show with someone who's not functioning at full strength knowingly. Phew. I think he kinda saw the self serving thing in it. He knows she's had a bit of a ball and chain on us. Another deciding factor was that her voice has kinda been going down the tubes for the past year. I'm not amazing singer. But it's her thumb that's messed, not her throat. We had talkes with her about it. Always willing to put in extra time, help, or listen to ideas. But she was stubborn beyond help. That's why her thumb got so bad.

 

We had an audition last night for a replacement. I don't know if we'll take the guy, only time will tell. But he took everything that we threw at him. And we threw a bunch of backing vocals at him. Let me tell you how rare it is for a guitarist to be able to sing in tune in general. Actually it's hard to find a good metal singer at all. That's kinda why I took it on. I couldn't sing well, but in tune somewhat for starters. Been working on that quite a bit for the pats few years. Apparently the other guitarist kinda realized there, that there's better things to work towrds. I'm lucky he changed his mind. I'm sure it had nothing to do with me though. But I'll take it.

 

The remaining three members came from bands that had serious work ethics. The member that we've parted ways from was a good player but came from a band that was more fun loving than hard working. She wanted to change addapt to a more hard core environment. But she didn't really ever take to it. Now that the vibe seems better and I was glad to hear my other guitarist say it. I'm glad he's looking at this as an improvement and a chance to do even better. Before she had to be asked to leave on account of her thumb we were talking about asking her to leave for other reasons. It was really hard for all of us. One week, someone in the band would want it, but I wouldn't, then someone else. Then maybe me. We all couldn't agree at the same time. The worst was that we all agreed a week before a show. I wanted not to think about it. It was killing the show vibe for me. Then she never came in after that show two months ago. She came about once a week for 25 min to say hi. It was always disruptive feeling. She never helped or threw in her thoughts about the songs we were writing. We'd just sit there and talk.

 

Any how, I feel bad for whatever reason on this parting. I've known this other guitarist since '96. I've invested so much of my time into this band. Where many of my peers decided to spread themselves a bit more and just play, play, play. I'm going to have to re-evaluate my own situation soon. I'm not looking for a cash cow, just a good creative outlet. That's why I finally decided to do my doom project. Before this band, I had at least 4 things I was involved in. Now I take something here and there. I think I'm going to pick it up a little more. I always seem to have more time than the others. That's no biggie, just more time to play. Maybe send off a few business responsabilities to the others. Who knows, maybe our future new guitarist will be a business monster and lighten the load for me some. Though I like the business part, it's part of the band to me, part of the process. It would certainly be odd to show show up to a show and play. How rock star?