TrancedelicBlues Posted December 17, 2004 Share Posted December 17, 2004 it's like hosting a chapter of renegade motorcycle outlaws... i live way out in the country... i didn't ask to have cats... they just showed up... but now that the weather is getting cold... if i let them come inside, will they be polite enough to refrain from pooping? we can work out litterbox issues later on this weekend... for now i think they can just sleep on the porch in the special cat house i built them the other day... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shniggens Posted December 17, 2004 Share Posted December 17, 2004 It gets cold in Florida? Cats poop in the house to SHOW their love. It's really the only gift they can give you. d Amateur Hack Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TrancedelicBlues Posted December 17, 2004 Author Share Posted December 17, 2004 Originally posted by shniggens: It gets cold in Florida? Cats poop in the house to SHOW their love. It's really the only gift they can give you. d yeah, it's not like they can give me a gift certificate to Guitar Center, is it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super 8 Posted December 17, 2004 Share Posted December 17, 2004 Originally posted by shniggens: Cats poop in the house to SHOW their love. It's true. It's kind of their way of saying; "I think enough of you that I'm willing to poop in your house." This is high praise comming from a cat....you know how snooty cats can be. Super 8 Hear my stuff here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sp3nc3r Posted December 17, 2004 Share Posted December 17, 2004 Originally posted by shniggens: Cats poop in the house to SHOW their love. It's really the only gift they can give you. dNot true... They also give the gift of slimy hairballs in darkened hallways! Cheers! Spencer "I prefer to beat my opponents the old-fashioned way....BRUTALLY!!!!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Base Posted December 17, 2004 Share Posted December 17, 2004 They are probably posting on a cat forum complaining about you showing up and moving all your stuff into their house Fa Fa FA Fa fa fa fa fa FA fa FA FA Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Base Posted December 17, 2004 Share Posted December 17, 2004 EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DIARY Day number 180 8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE! 9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE! 10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE! 11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE! 1:00 pm OH BOY! THE GARDEN! MY FAVORITE! 4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE! 5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE! Day number 181 8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE! 9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE! 10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE! 11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE! 1:00 pm OH BOY! THE GARDEN! MY FAVORITE! 4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE! 5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE! Day number 182 8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE! 9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE! 10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE! 11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE! 1:00 pm OH BOY! THE GARDEN! MY FAVORITE! 4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE! 5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE! 5:30 PM - OHH! BATHTIME! BUMMER! Fa Fa FA Fa fa fa fa fa FA fa FA FA Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Base Posted December 17, 2004 Share Posted December 17, 2004 EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY DAY 752 My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant. DAY 761 Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed. DAY 765 Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan. DAY 768 I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid?! My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth. DAY 771 There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer.." More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. DAY 774 I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time... Fa Fa FA Fa fa fa fa fa FA fa FA FA Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TrancedelicBlues Posted December 17, 2004 Author Share Posted December 17, 2004 Originally posted by The Baseter of Christmas Gone: They are probably posting on a cat forum complaining about you They've already done so !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sp3nc3r Posted December 17, 2004 Share Posted December 17, 2004 Originally posted by The Baseter of Christmas Gone: EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY DAY 752 My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant. DAY 761 Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed. DAY 765 Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan. DAY 768 I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid?! My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth. DAY 771 There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer.." More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. DAY 774 I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...No matter how many times I read this, it still makes me chuckle... I saw a doormat down to a pet store downtown a few weeks ago for cat lovers. It read: "If you ever want to see the people who live here alive again, leave 5 pounds of fresh tuna in a paper bag!" with a picture of a very cross lookin kitty on it. Very amusing. Cheers! Spencer "I prefer to beat my opponents the old-fashioned way....BRUTALLY!!!!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Botch. Posted December 17, 2004 Share Posted December 17, 2004 Both diaries were hilarious and right on the money! Wish there was a way I could post Gary Larson's "What we say to dogs/what they hear" and "What we say to cats/what they hear"... I miss The Farside Botch "Eccentric language often is symptomatic of peculiar thinking" - George Will www.puddlestone.net Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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