Stage Fright

[Old Music Guy]

Anyone have "Stage Fright" and still manage to play out? 

When I was in my teens/twenties, I was fearless. 50 years on, I can't muster the courage to play in front of people. 

Anyone have the same experience? 

[KuruPrionz]

I had more or less the same experience in reverse.

When I first started playing out, I had to put insanely heavy strings on my guitar or I wouldn't know they were there. 

I was tense, nervous and deeply troubled by getting up on stage in front of an audience and playing. 

When I got home, I had to change back to much lighter strings, I couldn't play on the heavy ones. 

 

Over time, many performances and a bit of alcohol, I became more comfortable. 

Now I have no trouble playing in front of people at at all, stone cold sober, relaxed and smiling. 

My first bar gigs were at 18 years old, I'm 67 now. 

[Caevan O’Shite]

Reverse here for me, too.

When I was young, I used to often get VERY tense and nervous if I was playing in front of even a few people in someone's living room- and of all weird things, my hands would sweat profusely. To the point that it looked like a trick involving hidden water lines pouring water down my wrists and hands, and it hindered my playing.

When I was 21 or 22, I had seen a TV program where a cancer patient had put himself into a sort of meditative self-hypnosis trance, and in his mind walked down long dark corridors looking for the office in charge of his cancer; once there, he made files dictating that he'd go into remission. In real life, he did go into remission, rapidly and seemingly miraculously.

So I did the same thing, meditating and focusing on the idea that I'd find the place in charge of my getting nervous like that, and the sweating hands.

I slowly came to hours later; the sun had gone down while I was unconscious. From then on, to this day, I've been very comfortable onstage in front of any size crowd, and my hands don't sweat like that.

[Old Music Guy]

WOW! Quite a story Caevan. I will think about that. I've suffered with panic disorder my entire life, even though I played professionally since I was 19. I'm 70 now, and the only person I can play in front of is my wife, Robin. 

 

[surfergirl]

Never had stage fright. It maybe because I come from a family of surfers, and from as long as I can remember I was taught that fear was my friend and how to face it. Besides that there is no audience tougher than surfers🤣

[Caevan O’Shite]

2 hours ago, surfergirl said:

Never had stage fright. It maybe because I come from a family of surfers, and from as long as I can remember I was taught that fear was my friend and how to face it.

Please expound on that, Jenny!

[Old Music Guy]

Undertow and a riptide is mortal fear. I've dealt with that.

Stage fright is not the same. 

[surfergirl]

2 hours ago, Caevan O’Shite said:

Please expound on that, Jenny!

You have to have respect for the Ocean and the wave. As you progress you have to your face your fears and know your limits.

Surfers are brutal, your best friends will celebrate your failures and then we all laugh about it at the end of the day. When got a concussion they waited till they knew I was ok to give me a bad time.🙂

[surfergirl]

Just now, Old Music Guy said:

Undertow and a riptide is mortal fear. I've dealt with that.

Stage fright is not the same. 

True!

[Old Music Guy]

Stretch flat out on your back, breathe and wait until Mother ocean grounds you. That is how you survive the ocean. 

It is not a good look on stage. 

[Caevan O’Shite]

58 minutes ago, surfergirl said:

You have to have respect for the Ocean and the wave.

Indeed. I may not be a surfer, but I can understand and relate to that.

[Old Music Guy]

Back in the late 60s I surfed Long Island beaches. Mostly because that's where I lived

In New York, at the time, you could not graduate HS. or any SUNY without being able to swim. Makes sense living on an island. (no so much in Albany!)

Nonetheless, having spend the greater part of my youth as a bronze beach boy surfer and sailor, the first thing I learned is water is your friend, until it isn't. 

This is a pic of the beach I spend most of my time, though I surfed mostly out at Shinnecock Inlet. 

Homesick...

(That is NOT me :))

 

 

[KuruPrionz]

1 hour ago, Old Music Guy said:

Undertow and a riptide is mortal fear. I've dealt with that.

Stage fright is not the same. 

You cannot trust the ocean, it has no regard for you whatsoever. 

Stage fright IS different, it is self-created fear of fear. 

[surfergirl]

Maybe the reason I've not had stage fright is that I've always been surrounded by 3 of my best friends and had total trust in them. So after I go out with my half sister in a few weeks(I hope) I may have stage fright, I'm already nervous.

[surfergirl]

2 hours ago, Old Music Guy said:

Back in the late 60s I surfed Long Island beaches. Mostly because that's where I lived

In New York, at the time, you could not graduate HS. or any SUNY without being able to swim. Makes sense living on an island. (no so much in Albany!)

Nonetheless, having spend the greater part of my youth as a bronze beach boy surfer and sailor, the first thing I learned is water is your friend, until it isn't. 

This is a pic of the beach I spend most of my time, though I surfed mostly out at Shinnecock Inlet. 

Homesick...

(That is NOT me :))

 

 

Isn't the water kinda cold back there? I'm a warm water person. I watch videos of people surfing the Great Lakes in the winter and I get cold watching.

[Winston Psmith]

@surfergirl- New York, New England, anywhere next to the North Atlantic, the water is generally cold, but if that's your nearest beach . . .

[Larryz]

SG, I started surfing at the age of 13 and I can see the connection between your 1st paddle out and stage fright playing & singing in front of an audience. After a few years you get comfortable doing both. I stopped surfing at the age of 19 (except for one last trip out with my son when I was 40).  Anyway the water in northern California is quite cold too and 1/2 wet suits are a must.  It gets warmer as you head south. I also played in my little Ventures surf band through High School '64 through '69.  My buddies and I still get together and play the old surf tunes now and then as we all live close by and are all the same ages (circa 73 years young).  Later in life, playing in a gigging band with 4 others, took all the stage fright pressure off.  Playing as a duo should work very well as you give each other confidence which me and my harmonica player did for a few years.  Playing solo at gigs and open mic's brought back a little stage fright at first.  The more you do it (surfing, guitars, singing, etc.,) in front of people, the easier it gets...I know you and your sister will do a great job.  You can always hire a bass and/or drum player if you want to add a little combo to the mix now and then...😎👍

[Winston Psmith]

Back on topic - one case of Performance Anxiety, rather than Stage Fright.

 

I'd been invited to join a Massed-Guitar event, my first such event, and told simply to show up at the performance venue several hours before the event, for rehearsal. I wasn't sure how any mere human was going to get 70 or so Guitarists to learn, and be ready to perform half a dozen pieces of Music, in the course of an afternoon, but WTH, right?

 

It worked, and it was glorious, a word I don't often use. Since then, I've taken part in several Massed-Guitar events with many of the same folks, at different venues, and those nights are among the highlights of my life as a Musician. If I'd let my initial apprehension about "How are we even going to pull this off?" hold me back, well . . .

 

 

[Stokely]

I have no issues playing, or singing in front of people, even just on a piano or in person by myself (though it took some time before I was confident enough with singing to do it).

However, I've had "lock ups" when attempting to give speeches.   Not always, but I used to be pretty uncomfortable giving any kind of speech or presentation even to a small-ish number of people.  I may be over it now, it's been a while since I had to do such a thing; again I think it mostly boils down to confidence in the subject.  

[Old Music Guy]

15 hours ago, surfergirl said:

Isn't the water kinda cold back there?

It's all relative  Spring is cold. Late in summer the water gets nice plus the surf gets better with stormier weather kicking in down south. It's also what I grew up with. I never knew what warm water was until I vacationed in the Caribbean. 

4 hours ago, Larryz said:

playing in a gigging band with 4 others, took all the stage fright pressure off. 

Larryz has it right. I started playing professionally when I was 19. Satin shirt/jumpsuit show band. Crowds, TV, shows, they never bothered me at all. When I got into my 30s and 40s  it was mostly happy bar band stuff at ski hills and little clubs. It was always a great time, but I still had the luxury of a bunch of guys to gig with. Now, I've been off the stage for so long it feels different. Fear of failure is the best way I can describe it. 

120 miles an hour feels a lot different at 70 years old than it did at 25.

[Larryz]

+1 Old Music Guy...As I get older, I find I do not like driving at night as much and I seldom exceed 70mph on the freeway.  I too suffer from Panic Attack and my biggest fear these days on stage is forgetting a lead verse or losing my place in the tune.  I limit my performances lately to open mic's as I only have two drinks and only have to remember 4 songs at a time LoL!  I still play with my buds at private parties and backyard BBQ's.  Since I play for free now, I don't worry if I screw up a little and have to bury a clam or two...😎👍

[Old Music Guy]

My statement was kind of a metaphor of life then and now, though I did get a 79 Porsche 911 Targa to scream at 137 mph once on my 29th b'day. 

I have a set of edrums that I mess with almost every night. I can practice with Tower of Power, do the "Purdie" shuffle, and nail "Blue Rondo ala Turk" with easy. But give me a 12 bar blues solo on guitar? I die.