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Horrific Murder-Suicide


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some people who are abused as children grow up to be what we consider monsters because they have damaged bodies and nervous systems, no means to control or modulate emotion, and their patterns of thought are either irrational or maladaptive due to their feelings, bodies and boundaries being violated when they had no means to defend themselves, and often, no one to step in and help on their behalf.

 

this story is riddled with clues that point to just those kinds of monsters.

 

may they all now rest in peace.

 

Namaste,

aeon

Go tell someone you love that you love them.
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Being abused as a child makes you far more likely to be an abuser as an adult - that's absolutely true. But I don't think that it in any way excuses or justifies it. You can always get help - counseling, whatever. And people ultimately have to take responsibility for their own decisions and actions.

 

This is a very sad story, and I feel terrible for the three children, as well as the woman. :(

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Oh Yeah, I read that in the newspaper this morning. What a freaking waste of skin that guy was, & what a loss of life he caused.

 

I truely hope he continues to burn, in hell, while his victims have gone on to a painless other world.

 

Our Joint

 

"When you come slam bang up against trouble, it never looks half as bad if you face up to it." The Duke...

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agreed 110% Phil, there is no excusing such behavior, even if we do have a potential explanation for it. we, as individuals, must take responsibility for the decisions (and their consequences) we make in this life when we are able to make those decisions for ourselves.

 

that said (and what I am about to say in no way violates or supercedes what I just said above), freewill and moral choice are not absolutes or black-and-white when we begin to consider the nature of neurotransmitters, brain structures, adrenal/stress regulation, impulse control, modulation of mood, and the many other systems and processes of the human body that are forever changed and often damaged after a child has been physically, emotionally, and/or sexually abused.

 

so again...yes, it is wrong...but it also potentially very understandable as to why it occurs, even in light of it being wrong.

 

cheers,

aeon

Go tell someone you love that you love them.
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Absolutely horrible. Especially for the kids. They didn't ask to be born into that situation. :cry:

 

This worries me as one of my co-workers is going through a messy divorce right now. To believe her (and she looks and acts every bit the part of the happy homemaker) the ex is a coniving adulterer who has attempted (and succeeded, to a degree) to turn her kids against her, tries to change the court ordered rules of their custody sharing agreement, and has even used his connections with a DCFS worker elsewhere in the state to attempt to have her deemed an unfit mother. (That last bit backfired on him when the judge came to the truth of the matter. ;) )

 

Believe me, I'm hyper-aware that her situation could turn out every bit as messed up as the godawful situation described in this news item.

It's easiest to find me on Facebook. Neil Bergman

 

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What can you say? There are thousands, probably tens of thousands or more abusive situations. They don't all end up as badly as this one did, but for a woman or a child to live ONE DAY with a man like this is something that should never happen.

 

We focus so much money and effort on terrorism, yet the terror of an abused woman or child's life can go on for years unnoticed. It's an epidemic, a rampant, hideous disease that deserves more resources, more attention, and radical, new, highly effective methods of detection and treatment.

 

The war on private terror should be attacked with the same vigor and commitment as the war on public terror, because the private terror of abuse tends to replicate itself, generation after generation.

The Black Knight always triumphs!

 

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In the issue of balance, I am very close to an abuse survivor that has suceeded in breaking the cycle. She is a model parent. An abuse history may create tendencies that push you towards repeating the cycle, but it does not guaruntee it.

 

I'm going to go home and hug my family now. I don't need the assurance that this loser is suffering some eternal damnation. I just need my family with me.

Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform.

Mark Twain (1835-1910)

--------------------

Reporter: "Ah, do you think you could destroy the world?" The Tick: "Ehgad I hope not. That's where I keep all my stuff!"

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"Antigone Allen dropped out of school at age 15 to have Christine, and did not have a high-school diploma. She had pleaded guilty to a juvenile misdemeanor charge of assault after hitting a fellow middle-school student, according to court records."

 

The fuck is this? Blame the victim? Teen-aged mom? No diploma? Hit somebody in middle school?

 

What an awful story. Really no need to insult the dead woman this way. Insult to horrible, horrible injury.

A WOP BOP A LU BOP, A LOP BAM BOOM!

 

"There is nothing I regret so much as my good behavior. What demon possessed me that I behaved so well?" -Henry David Thoreau

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I read that bit in another way. By pointing out the victim's lack of education and vocational training, it shows how limited her resources were. She had very few options, and small children to feed and care for.

 

Our wonderful federal government is systematicly making it more and more dificult to be poor in this country....or at least to break out of poverty. Unless you have a green card, then you can have any service you need, and workers to make sure you get that service (thank you, NAFTA). If you're born a poor US citizen, your options are severely limited. In my day job, I manage an ever shrinking budget to provide employment and vocational training to disadvantaged youth. The feds are constantly cutting our budget.

 

Here's just one example: Last year, they cut funding for adult education. It used to be, if you wanted to go back and finish high school, you could just show up at our office and begin working. If you were motivated and willing to work, you could earn your diploma. NOW, we are required to charge $260 per half credit for adult ed, unless the person is destitute. So a person comes in with no job, no diploma, and they're supposed to come up with that kind of money to finish their diploma?

 

Had this victim had access to child care, eduation, and training, she might have been better able to strike out on her own.

 

That paragraph about her unfinished education points to a failure of both the educational and family assistance systems, not a personal failure on her part.

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