DanG Posted February 6, 2004 Share Posted February 6, 2004 The cruellest (nothing violent please) things youve done to a fellow musician. Ive always thought of myself as a level headed decent sort, not too nice not too nasty. But weve all got that nasty streak within us. I want to hear some unforgivable stories that youve done to fellow musos, bar owners and managers. Heres one of mine: A pre-Madonna singer, with an ego the size of a star system that had just joined a band with a me and some mates decided that he didnt like the drummer, whom I might add was a really gentle-decent bloke, a dream drummer that could play. Hed use any excuse to try and kick this drummer out of the band, one lame excuse was the drummers shoes do not look good. The bass player and I decided that enough was enough and planned to change the keys on the songs in the set, so nearly every verse modulated at this packed gig in the bar we were playing, he made an ass of himself, the musical carpet had been pulled from beneath him, and he couldnt comprehend what was happening. The bar fired us, we didnt care, that night he learnt a valuable lesson on conquer and divide, and never played with us again. BTW, I've grown up since then, and would never pull this kind of stunt again, ego guy or no ego guy. I have loads and loads of these kind of stories as Im sure all of you do, please share some of yours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawill Posted February 6, 2004 Share Posted February 6, 2004 We had lost our drummer and had gigs lined up so we had to replace him fast. We found this guy who was at least decent. During our rehersals to get him up to speed, he used my drum set since it was already set up in our rehersal space. When we played our first gig, it was in a fairly small club. He had his own kit and every time he hit his crash cymbal, everyone in the place cringed because it was so ear splittingly loud. At our first break, while the rest of the band was at the bar, I applied a 1x1 inch piece of duct tape to the bottom of his cymbal. We started playing the next set and at the end of the first song, he tried to make a dramatic crash and all that came out was bbblllaaattt I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henryrobinett Posted February 6, 2004 Share Posted February 6, 2004 About the cruelest thing I've done, that I can recall, is firing someone who really wanted to be in the band. Wanted someone else, newer and "improved". We had a great group. Had a chemistry. Phenomenal, pianist, excellent drummer and really, really good guitarist (me!). Bass player was a great musician but didn't do certain things like I wanted. I was the writer. The other members reluctantly agreed with me. I had a heart to heart. Feelings were hurt but he took it well. Got our bass player and things were never the same. The "vibe" was gone. Plus even though the other guys agreed and may have even instigated the move, unconciously they felt "violated". I know that sounds weird. But it was a band. For the first time someone had been let go. And now they knew anyone could be let go. I should have explained more what I wanted and let him provide it, and add his own inimitable flavor, as a real group would do. I did a similar thing a few years later -- I hadn't yet learned my lesson. Recording our 4th CD. It wasn't a REAL band any longer, but close. Certainly could have been. The sax player who'd been playing with me over the previous year or so, wasn't cutting his parts in the studio. I hired a ringer friend of mine. So happened this guy, unbeknownst to me at the time, and my sax guy had bad blood. So behind his back I hired this guy. Everyone in the band was in agreement with this move. The sax player and my relationship has never been the same, needless to say. I should have brought him back and taken the time for him to get it right. That's a band. It pays to be considerate. All the best, Henry Robinett Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazz Guitar Posted February 6, 2004 Share Posted February 6, 2004 Originally posted by DanG: The cruellest (nothing violent please) things youve done to a fellow musician. Don't have to look further than this place. I've seen some really pathetic idiots here. I'm not saying everybody is, but there sure are alot more than one might think at first. Of course some tend to bring out the idiocy in others more than others. I wouldn't know anything about that aspect however. Have you recorded an MP3 today? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeebus Posted February 6, 2004 Share Posted February 6, 2004 MNJGG, all your music are suck. 1) Get a drummer. 2) Too much chorus and reverb. 3) Habanero's Revenge sounds like a bad 80's rock player trying to play jazz. 4) Your soloing has no direction and is completely uninteresting, you noodle your way through the changes with no real drive or motive. 5) Your version of Stormy Monday is the biggest piece of shit I've ever heard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lee Flier Posted February 6, 2004 Share Posted February 6, 2004 The worst thing I ever did to a musician involved a band I was engineering. And although I would never do something like this again, I don't regret having done it to this guy! This was in the mid 80's and these guys were your basic L.A. 80's hair band nightmare. They sounded like Loverboy, and they had "financial backing" from a manager who thought they were gonna be the Next Big Thing, an opinion they obviously shared. They wore their Spandex, hairspray and makeup to the studio every day. Of course, they all had egos the size of planets and they all hated each other and fought constantly. I had the unfortunate task of coming into the project to record overdubs because the previous engineer, the studio owner, couldn't take it anymore. So right away they were freaked out about having a different engineer, and even more freaked out because I was a GIRL. Which obviously meant I couldn't possibly know what I was doing, and they were pretty blunt about saying so. It was pretty obvious that nothing was going to get done if I didn't do something to put them in their place - I'm a patient person with a sense of humor, but they quickly exhausted my patience and had absolutely NO sense of humor, so I couldn't win them over with that. I finally decided I'd had enough when the lead singer was tracking vocals and kept belittling and blaming me every time he blew a take, which was often. He was hands down the biggest jerk I've ever worked with. So, I patched a Harmonizer into the vocal in his headphone mix and detuned it just a little bit, so that in his cans he was hearing himself just a little flat, which caused him to overcompensate and sing sharp. He got completely freaked out by this and his bandmates, who were in the control room listening, started laughing at him and telling him he was losing his voice. Then I nudged the Harmonizer so it was a bit sharp, which then caused him to sing flat. The rest of the band were just merciless about this, telling him he couldn't sing anymore. The singer was just about out of his mind, completely freaking out and unable to figure out why his pitch was so off. Finally after 5 or 10 minutes of this I told him what I'd been doing. "Look," I said, "You think you can destroy my ego? I can destroy yours in 10 minutes. DON'T FUCK WITH ME." The rest of the session was still a nightmare, but everybody respected me from that point on and reserved their abuse for each other rather than me. Like I said, probably not the best professional move, but it sure felt good at the time! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazz Guitar Posted February 6, 2004 Share Posted February 6, 2004 Originally posted by Jeebus: MNJGG, all your music are suck. Still waiting for that link to your music, chickencrap. Where oh where can it be? In your imagination? Perhaps you recorded it with your Custom Shop Air Guitar with your invisible Dumble amplifier? Have you recorded an MP3 today? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob Campbell Posted February 6, 2004 Share Posted February 6, 2004 When ever I would break a string on my Floyd Rose guitar, I would continue to play proudly whilst casting disparaging looks at the other guitar player. This would cause the other band members and audience to asume it was he that was making the racous den. rob My Songs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueZet Posted February 6, 2004 Share Posted February 6, 2004 in my first band (I'm talking the days when dinosaurs still roamed these parts now ) there were only 3: two guitar players and a drummer. We had great fn rehearsing with the audience of just about everybody wanting to come 'round every Saturday afternoon. and THEN we got A GIG!!!! Great expectations,etcetc. Living up to it for weeks. The day of the "concert" we had a last rehearsal and what do you think: one of our faithfull fans shows up with a BASS and a BASS AMP. Unfortunately, he didn't even have a clue as to how to even hold that 'big guitar'. So now we had two guitars (with only one amp) a drummer and a bassplayer + amp. We took him to the gig, placed him in front of my amp "so he could follow the guitar changes", unplugged his bass from the amp which we placed on the other side of the stage and used it for the other guitar player... half an hour of nodding and " - you're doing great" later, the gig was over, he was in 7th heaven and we'd almost wet our pants laughing we never DID have the guts to tell him, though - and he never became a bass player after all... - due to recent cutbacks, the light at the end of the tunnel has been SWITCHED OFF Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guitar Geezer Posted February 6, 2004 Share Posted February 6, 2004 Originally posted by Lee Flier: The worst thing I ever did to a musician involved a band I was engineering. Like I said, probably not the best professional move, but it sure felt good at the time! Lee...that's priceless....ranks up there with Mixermans BitchSlap sessions LynnG Lynn G Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Thrashole Posted February 7, 2004 Share Posted February 7, 2004 I think the worst was replacing a drummer with this girl he brought to practice once. She jumped behind the kit on a break and was easily three times the drummer he was. I think I have been suffering from bad drummer Karma ever since. Reach out and grab a clue. Something Vicious My solo crap Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DanG Posted February 7, 2004 Author Share Posted February 7, 2004 Finally after 5 or 10 minutes of this I told him what I'd been doing. "Look," I said, "You think you can destroy my ego? I can destroy yours in 10 minutes. DON'T FUCK WITH ME." The rest of the session was still a nightmare, but everybody respected me from that point on and reserved their abuse for each other rather than me. Like I said, probably not the best professional move, but it sure felt good at the time Lee, damn right.. do you still get those 'oh no a girl' looks? Rob, thats a cool classic move, love it. Has anyone farted right next to the drummer mid tune and walked smuggly back to your side of the stage? Cruel init? Also if you've got a trem, give the guitar player a false E when tunning. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Major Tom Posted February 7, 2004 Share Posted February 7, 2004 Lee - I laughed out loud reading that part about the harmonizer, you are way, way cool! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lee Flier Posted February 11, 2004 Share Posted February 11, 2004 Originally posted by DanG: Lee, damn right.. do you still get those 'oh no a girl' looks?Nahh... honestly, I never did get too much of that. It was a little bit tougher 20 years ago than now, especially on the phone - sometimes I'd call somebody about a gig and they'd immediately be put off by a female voice on the phone. But, I usually just kept chatting away with them about music, and a lot of times I'd say something like, "Hey, even if we don't end up working together we should stay in touch. I'd like to check your band out, it sounds like something I would like." And usually by the end of the conversation they would at least be willing to give me a chance. But most people who actually dealt with me in person didn't give me any attitude (at least, not about being female - some people have attitude no matter who they're dealing with! ). I found that if I just showed up and did my job like anybody else, people usually respected that. Has anyone farted right next to the drummer mid tune and walked smuggly back to your side of the stage? LOL! Ooh, that's nasty. Our bass player quite enjoys belching loudly into the mic. He has almost no sense of smell, though, so we can't get him back with farts! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DanG Posted February 11, 2004 Author Share Posted February 11, 2004 Lee - My friend Sam gets the music store guys everytime, she'll walk in to look at a guitar and the guys will say, shall I tune it up for you, is it for your boyfriend, it might be too big for your hands. She then proceeds to play the most beautiful chord melody.... embarrased smiles all around - along with the sound of chins hitting the floor.. We once perferated the drummers snare with pins, and on the first bar BANG.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gabriel E. Posted February 11, 2004 Share Posted February 11, 2004 Used to play in a band with a drummer who would not stop playing if we stopped to go over a part during practice. We'd have to yell to get his attention. Back in those days I played through a '74 Twin Reverb. I discovered by accident that if the polarity switch was set to a certain position, the bassist and I would get zapped if we were both touching our strings and ran into each other. So when the drummer wouldn't shut the fuck up, we'd go over to him and touch him with our bass and guitar. It was like a Skinner box - the drummer learned to quiet down and pay attention pretty quickly. "You never can vouch for your own consciousness." - Norman Mailer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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