Chip McDonald Posted January 14, 2001 Share Posted January 14, 2001 .... holds a $179 Ibanez classical guitar in my face and asks "why does this does not sound deep?" That's all he said. He didn't specify what he was comparing it to: a Ramirez, a K-Mart fiber board guitar, a Gibson Jumbo, a grain silo - nothing else. "Well, what have you got?" His response: "Do you think it's because of the strings?" Me: "what....? Uhmm.. I don't know, I can't tell you without knowing what you're comparing it to....? .... it's only a $179 guitar....? .. it sounds like what it is..?". Other Guy: "Ok." Walks off. "?" The Decline of Western Civilization marches on... http://www.mp3.com/chipmcdonald Guitar Lessons in Augusta Georgia: www.chipmcdonald.com Eccentric blog: https://chipmcdonaldblog.blogspot.com/ / "big ass windbag" - Bruce Swedien Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
philabtinternet.com Posted January 15, 2001 Share Posted January 15, 2001 Originally posted by Chip McDonald: .... holds a $179 Ibanez classical guitar in my face and asks "why does this does not sound deep?" That's all he said. He didn't specify what he was comparing it to: a Ramirez, a K-Mart fiber board guitar, a Gibson Jumbo, a grain silo - nothing else. "Well, what have you got?" His response: "Do you think it's because of the strings?" Me: "what....? Uhmm.. I don't know, I can't tell you without knowing what you're comparing it to....? .... it's only a $179 guitar....? .. it sounds like what it is..?". Other Guy: "Ok." Walks off. You should have smashed it over his head and said...Peace man! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chip McDonald Posted January 15, 2001 Author Share Posted January 15, 2001 Originally posted by phila@btinternet.com: You should have smashed it over his head and said...Peace man! Oooh... If only... 15 years of working in music stores, suddenly in the past 2 years it seems the average IQ has plummeted. THINGS HEARD IN A MUSIC STORE RECENTLY: "This guitar is defective. Is was in tune when we bought it last month but now it's out of tune". "This string is defective. It broke." "...but why *can't* I use a thumbpick to play "Battery" by Metallica?" "..do you know how to play that song? You know, that popular one?" (again - THAT'S ALL THE INFORMATION THAT WAS GIVEN...) "do you have that pedal that makes it sound like you're good?" "you got box go boom?" "...but I don't *want* to be in tune!" .. and on and on and on and on day after day after day after day... http://www.mp3.com/chipmcdonald Guitar Lessons in Augusta Georgia: www.chipmcdonald.com Eccentric blog: https://chipmcdonaldblog.blogspot.com/ / "big ass windbag" - Bruce Swedien Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 21, 2001 Share Posted January 21, 2001 http://www.musicplayer.com/ubb/eek.gif ........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Room Warrior Posted January 21, 2001 Share Posted January 21, 2001 Chip - PLEASE tell me that last one isn't true, lest I fall upon my sword. Arrrgh! Jim Bordner Gravity Music "Tunes so heavy, there oughta be a law." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chip McDonald Posted January 22, 2001 Author Share Posted January 22, 2001 Originally posted by Guest Room Warrior: Chip - PLEASE tell me that last one isn't true, lest I fall upon my sword. Arrrgh! Well... unfortunately that's not only true, but just a sampling. It would seem tuning has become in some circles associated with "knowing what you're doing", which is very unhip these days. It happens more and more often, the casual "oh, I don't need to know how to tune, Cobain/Jimi/Bizkit/whoever doesn't tune". Never mind they can't hear it themselves, the trend in the 80's of rallying against playing solos (the root of which was people that could solo actually knew something about what they were doing) to now being basically "don't ever learn anything except a bar chord". Then there is the kids that don't understand you have to push the string into the fret to make it work. Kids that don't understand that you turn the knob on the tuner to make it change pitch. Kids that can't tell you - from practical experience of just living in the world - whether tightening the string will make the sound go up or down... Kids that refuse to learn the names of the strings because "Cobain/Jimi/whoever didn't know that"... Kids that ask what the volume knob does... Kids that have to trace the string with their finger all the way from the bridge of the guitar to the machine heads to figure which string to tune... Kids who expect to be able to learn how to read music in one lesson, so they don't have to take lessons anymore (or at least that is what he told me...)... I had one guy at the beginning of last year quit because he thought you "just move your hands around, kind of like swinging a bat, and that's how you play guitar". Then there's parents that ask questions like: "will he be able to take his guitar to football camp?" (How would I know that??? Then, the lady gets mad at me because I tell her "I don't know....?") "He's been taking lessons for almost 4 weeks now: why can't he play (insert parent's favorite song here, like Layla, Stairway, whatever...). "He broke his string in the lesson, so shouldn't you buy him another string?" "Why can't my son come to his lesson at 7:00?" (because the store I teach at closes at 7:00) "well.... what if he came on another day at 7:00?" (because THE STORE CLOSES AT 7:00) "well... what if he just comes on his regular day, but at 7:00 instead?" (BECAUSE THE STORE CLOSES AT 7:00!!!) "My son broke his wrist playing football yesterday and can't move his finger; is that going to be a problem?" (let me get this straight: he can't move his fingers, but is THAT going to be a problem..?) (female student with long nails) "But I just had my nails manicured - I can't cut them shorter!" "Is there a book I can buy... you know, like those cheat books for videogames?" But my favorite is still: "Can you show me how to play that song... you know... the popular one?" .. and on and on. Gets weirder every year. http://www.mp3.com/chipmcdonald Guitar Lessons in Augusta Georgia: www.chipmcdonald.com Eccentric blog: https://chipmcdonaldblog.blogspot.com/ / "big ass windbag" - Bruce Swedien Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InsightPro Posted January 23, 2001 Share Posted January 23, 2001 That's funny. It really makes you wonder. "Give a man a fish, and he'll eat for a day. Teach a man how to fish, and he'll spend all day in a boat drinking beer." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 23, 2001 Share Posted January 23, 2001 I've gotta be honest with you.While these posts are good for a chuckle. I am no longer surprised by anything I see or hear . You see, last year we were doing a show ( can't remember where), and the soundman...(SOMEONE WHO IS ACTUALLY DOING THIS FOR A LIVING)... asked our drummer Scott ( a double-kick child of the seventies) IF HE USES BOTH KICKS ! ! !. With a perplexed look Scott said "YES". And the the soundman replied " Oh , do you want me to mike the other one too?". And some people don't understand why musicians on the road tend to drink...ALOT... http://www.musicplayer.com/ubb/eek.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BK_dup2 Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Hey Chip, I understand your pain. I Worked at the North Dallas Guitar Center a few years back and Man the dumdest of dumb questions were uttered every second of everyday. The one customer that would drive me nuts was the person who wants to look at every pick the store has. "Whats the difference between the pink medium fender and the blue medium fender." Well, if you were a dog --none. And if you were a human NONE!!!. so to answer the question your kind understands is "%^$&**^%#". That sounds bitter but the question usually starts with a whole dialog about how great they or their band is. Great, bring a tape!!! I lasted about 4 months in that black hole.. The worst part about it is that you are selling this kid picks and he is time munching your commisions because the other guys behind the counter just sold an entire rack system. What a beating!!!! Everyday was gravy after I split that "sales associate opporutinity". Brian Kahanek Sidewinder Music Inc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tedster Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 I think some of the worst have to be the parents that bring their kids in, and want to know why "guitars are so expensive"...hey, a Squier Strat and practice amp for around two bills isn't that bad. And then they say, "I don't know, I think I'll just have junior play clarinet in school band" not accounting for the fact that a new clarinet runs well beyond that...even a cheapo. And to top it off, no one blinks at dropping a couple hundred for a video game system, not to mention the games, or golf gear, or what have you... "Cisco Kid, was a friend of mine" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chip McDonald Posted January 31, 2001 Author Share Posted January 31, 2001 Originally posted by Tedster: that a new clarinet runs well beyond that...even a cheapo. And to top it off, no one blinks at dropping a couple hundred for a video game system, not to mention the games, or golf gear, or what have you... Yeah, it's really strange. The guitar gets no respect in that sense. A student of mine who played a really terrible Harmony acoustic asked "if my parents bought me an electric would it be easier to play?" - so I told him yes... So his parents buy him... wait for it... AN EVEN CHEAPER HARMONY ELECTRIC. Action: 1/2 inch at the 12th Intonation: none Bridge: straight line, non-adjustable !!!! ... of course his parents blame it on me: they buy a $60 K-Mart guitar and get mad because I tell them it's essentially not playable? "but you said an electric guitar..." Whatever.... Losing my sanity... http://www.mp3.com/chipmcdonald Guitar Lessons in Augusta Georgia: www.chipmcdonald.com Eccentric blog: https://chipmcdonaldblog.blogspot.com/ / "big ass windbag" - Bruce Swedien Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michael saulnier Posted February 1, 2001 Share Posted February 1, 2001 Originally posted by Chip McDonald: A student of mine who played a really terrible Harmony acoustic asked "if my parents bought me an electric would it be easier to play?" - so I told him yes... So his parents buy him... wait for it... AN EVEN CHEAPER HARMONY ELECTRIC. Action: 1/2 inch at the 12th Intonation: none Bridge: straight line, non-adjustable !!!! ... of course his parents blame it on me: they buy a $60 K-Mart guitar and get mad because I tell them it's essentially not playable? "but you said an electric guitar..." Whatever.... Losing my sanity... /QUOTE] This thread is one of the saddest / funniest so far... And it brings back memories aplenty... I remember my Mom and Dad got me an electric guitar for Christmas... a Global strat clone. It was not what you would call a "nice" guitar. But I still have fond memories about that hunk of lumber... so even though it sucked, it was "my" guitar... I played the hell out of it in the first year and a half until I could afford my first nice guitar. It was a bit better than the Harmony you described... but not much. http://www.musicplayer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif. So I know first hand that "Mom's and Dad's" try hard but are typically clueless about guitar stuff... and of course terrified that Junior will not like the guitar after two weeks and their money will be down the drain...which they practically guarantee with poor equipment and a "hurry up" attitude. and on, and on... The other side is funny too... Teenage kid comes in with his "upscale" Mom and Dad, tells them that "all the guys I like are playing this guitar... and he leaves with a PRS Single cut or something. Lessons? Who needs lessons? ...Do I smell "pawnshop prize" somewhere down the road? When I worked music retail I developed a habit of educating kids and parents a little and helping them realize the "now and later" needs of an emerging guitar player. Some got it... others didn't... I'm sure I could win some bets as to which are still playing after all these years... guitplayer I'm still "guitplayer"! Check out my music if you like... http://www.michaelsaulnier.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michael saulnier Posted February 1, 2001 Share Posted February 1, 2001 I remember another episode... I was early 20's selling guitars and so on... One day an "Aqualung" looking guy came into the store. He was dirty, he smelled, matted hair, bad teeth, bad breath, torn and wrinkled clothes, paint spattered hat and boots... he was scary ugly. None of the salespeople would talk with him... he sauntered into the "high end room" and plunked himself into the comfy chair and picked up a guitar and kinda noodled with it. The owner nodded in my direction... I took a deep breath went in, gave him my warmest "hey there" and started my friendly sales spiel... then he said... Wait a second... Yeah, of course, the guy was a multi-millionaire who was replacing all of his music gear, buying all new high end equipment, and every possible toy. Turns out his home was burglarized and he was here to spend the $50,000 insurance check he got... I made a "retail" killing, found out the guy was rich and nice, and dressing this way was his way of "hiding" who he was until someone gave him good service. If I had blown him off he would have walked... Anyway it was my "box of chocolates" moment and to this day I NEVER judge the book by the cover. guitplayer I'm still "guitplayer"! Check out my music if you like... http://www.michaelsaulnier.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 1, 2001 Share Posted February 1, 2001 At this very moment I am doing a toast (BV) to all of us who have to endure this kind of mass stupidity on an almost daily basis!!!! Here's to us! http://www.musicplayer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif To hell with them! http://www.musicplayer.com/ubb/mad.gif CHEERS http://www.musicplayer.com/ubb/wink.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gator Wing Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Keep those stories coming! I love them!!!! There are two theories about arguing with a woman. Neither one works. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BK_dup2 Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Well Gatorwing, Here is another from my gold collection. This kid 14-15 years old walks into guitar center one busy Sat. He asks me questions regarding guitar cables for around 30 min or so . I finally sold him a proco cable. It was in the price range for him. Thinking after the sale that the fellow was somewhat dim but harmless. BOY was I wrong. He comes back an hour later and says "this one doesn't sound good can I get the spectraflex." I said sure. He walks out with a new spectraflex for $35+. You would think that its over by this point. he got what he wants. NOT even close. He comes back that late afternoon. I am talking to another customer and pretend I don't see him. If you have ever been to Guitar Center on Sat afternoon its a mad house. He comes up to me and taps me on the shoulder and says something like "I dont like the cable I want the one I had before." Thinking OK this is the last time. I walk away from a potential sale to get the guy out of my hair. Sunday morning : Here he comes: he returns the original cable and wants a different color spectraflex. I inform him that this is the last time he can do a return. Sunday Afternoon: Here he comes with his Mom. She proceeds to bitch me up one side a tree and down another because I keep selling him the wrong cable. (is there really a wrong cable when your 15?). I lose it and walk away before I let go like Mussolini from the balcony. I get the manager to handle it. Finally, the seige of the cable boy comes to an end. I dont like to spread bad vibes but this kid's family tree was as straight as they come. He had his sister's eyes. Stop the madness!!!! BK Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chip McDonald Posted February 4, 2001 Author Share Posted February 4, 2001 It must be aspartame interacting with Prozac or some such... My lessons cost $60 for 4 30 minute lessons. You have to give me a week's notice in order to schedule a makeup lesson, or you forfeit that lesson... Despite having all my students sign a contract that explains that, I still get people calling the day of their lesson: "I'm sick, can I schedule a makeup lesson?"... So I do it anyway. Then, THEY DON'T SHOW UP FOR THE MAKEUP LESSON EITHER. The way *I* look at it is I'm out $30: $15 for the original time slot they missed, then anbother $15 for the makeup time slot. But I won't charge them for the makeup lesson they skipped out on either... Right? That's reasonable, right? Recently.. this is surreal... I've had a problem with parents rescheduling at the last moment, then missing the makeup. HERE'S THE REALLY WEIRD "AM I IN AN ALTERNATE UNIVERSE?" PART: The following week they not only want CREDIT for the lesson they missed the first time - BUT THEY WANT CREDIT FOR THE MAKEUP LESSON AS WELL!!!! So in other words, instead of 4 lessons for $60 - ultimately 4 lessons PLUS 2 extra: the one they missed AND THE FREAKING MAKEUP LESSON THEY MISSED!!!! 6 lessons for the price of 4, PLUS I get to stand around waiting for them to show two times in a row!???? Suddenly, as of about a year ago, I'm finding myself arguing with parents/students about this, it's unreal. 16 years of teaching, the same policy, and now suddenly people are acting completely and utterly irrational. I'm not joking now when I say this: *something is wrong with people thesedays*. I've even thought maybe there's a mild form of kuru/bovine spongiform encephalopathy going around, or maybe Hussein snuck some bio-war bug into our water, or "something".... Because it's getting worse, to the point it's almost comical now. Unfortuntately, I'm losing my mind as a byproduct of it as well.... http://www.mp3.com/chipmcdonald Guitar Lessons in Augusta Georgia: www.chipmcdonald.com Eccentric blog: https://chipmcdonaldblog.blogspot.com/ / "big ass windbag" - Bruce Swedien Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BK_dup2 Posted February 5, 2001 Share Posted February 5, 2001 Chip, This fast food - something for nothing mentality is really pissing me of. I stopped teaching a couple of years ago because the same crap you are dealing with. The only thing can think of is for you to start being a hard ass and having like 6 month contracts. The School I use to teach at in Dallas had strict guidelines on missed lessons. Even then people would flake and flake and flake. The great thing is they have to pay for six months because the credit card was billed. On top of that in the contract strictly states makeup lesson guidelines. God bless ya Man--- BK Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 5, 2001 Share Posted February 5, 2001 I also gave up giving lessons a couple of years ago. Not only were the students and parents unreasonable about scheduling, but for every student who worked hard on their lesson and really wanted to play well, I had to deal with five who must have just liked the idea of being a guitar player. The result was lesson after lesson of rehashing the same old same old. Quitting seemed the only reasonable option. I do however miss those moments when the lightbulb went off in a students head. Sob Sob...Sob... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michael saulnier Posted February 5, 2001 Share Posted February 5, 2001 Chip, your student experiences are funny and tragic at the same time. I can tell you care about giving good service and having happy customers. It's a shame that you're getting shafted in return. Tell us you have a couple of positive, life-affirming experiences to balance it out or I think it may be time for an intervention... guitplayer I'm still "guitplayer"! Check out my music if you like... http://www.michaelsaulnier.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jermushflinthills.com Posted February 5, 2001 Share Posted February 5, 2001 During 80's, I played in several cover bands, two of which were very successful, monetarily and musically. But when the 90's hit, it was "un-cool" to play covers, so the hip thing was to play 30 minn. worth of your own songs and have two other bands like that fill out the night. So the kids are not learning to play their instrument. Playing covers good enough to be booked 6 nights a week meant learning to play all the licks and styles that were on the recording of the songs you were covering. The trend of doing only original material killed the learning curve ( as well as the need to learn how to tune your instrument) and thus this generation doesn't know how to play their instruments....I don't want to sound like the guy who says, "in my day....", but it seems like these young bands who play for $20 and beer, are lost after they use up the four chords (five if they consider themselves an "alternative" band), and soloing doesn't exist. No wonder the big rock clubs that used to dot the landscape in the midwest (which used to keep making my car payments) have dried up. Instead of hiring bands that play 4+ hrs. of dance-able music, they now hire three that cant' play in tune....it's sad out there right now...that's why the hip hop and dj bands have made a hit, they don't really have to be musicians.....ok, I'm off my soapbox now... ------------------ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chip McDonald Posted February 5, 2001 Author Share Posted February 5, 2001 Originally posted by guitplayer: Tell us you have a couple of positive, life-affirming experiences to balance it out or I think it may be time for an intervention... I've had a number of students go on to be "successful" in music; a couple in some fairly known bands, one who is getting his masters in music performance in classical guitar right now, others... I have a history of supplying local high schools with jazz band guitarists, so I feel my teaching abilities are pretty proven... I've given lots of what I call "bar top guitar lessons"... In other words, Known Ace Guitar Hero in town engages me at the bar in idle banter that turns to "well... hey.. uhmm. just how *does* that work?" "How do you use scales?", "how do you know what chord to play?", etc.. just about all of them in town, actually..., although I'll never reveal their secret as to *who*... Had a student of mine who was getting the hang of improvising pretty well, that had been playing for about a year keep telling me he was jamming with his neighbor down the street. "He plays violin", "oh, ok, cool" I say. Later it turns out he's been jamming around with Allan Sloan, of Dixie Dregs fame... That was pretty funny. One of my earliest students won the Georgia All State band competition. I helped him construct a "Guided Munitions Strategic Solo Strike" of a guitar solo for him (as in, 15 year old kid takes a solo and rips off sweep picked bop arpeggios with swinging accents, approach notes, passing tones, diminished run, Coltrane and Parker quotes... the judges didn't have a chance... ).. Anyhow, he walks in the next week with a one-of-fifty custom Gibson ES-175. "I won it at All State"... Man, I skipped out on All State competition when I was in HS because I'm against it on principle, but THEY DIDN'T TELL ME YOU COULD WIN A NEW GUITAR!!!! Ahg.. I've had other "non-guitar" things happen though. Just recently a student suddenly flunked a class; his parents felt that although he was banned from playing guitar for 8 weeks, it was still worthwhile for him to come to his lesson with me. So they pay me to lecture him on "whatever" - quantum physics, zen philosophy, the perils of drug abuse, learning to think like an adult.., etc.. I had a kid a few years ago come in who was *obviously* over medicated for ADD. Now and then he came in having missed his meds - and while he was hyper, he just seemed like an "excitable kid" to me - and I told his parents that. They took him off Ritalin and he immediately did better in school, found new friends, etc... Another kid's father made him take lessons - even though the kid didn't want to play guitar - "because you're the only one that gets any sense talked into him". That was pretty funny... One kid wrote a report at school about how he wanted to be a guitar teacher like me. I don't know if that's a good thing or not... It seems I've started a number of people on careers in the computer field by default; back in the day in the Internet was totally unknown to anyone I always had a computer in the room with me - with parts inevitably hanging out - which would prompt the eventual realization from students I was computer-literate..... Which lead to answering computer questions, and in a few cases getting a few into programming. One I think works for MS right now, another is probably finished with a CS degree from Georgia Tech (actually, that guy managed to get a job as a kid at the local nuclear bomb plant playing Doom all day long based on coaching him on computer stuff in lessons... ("hey Chip, guess what I'm doing? They pay me out at SRS to sit at a computer to do CAD, but all I really do is play Doom all day!"). A thoracic heart surgeon once confessed to me in a lesson "you should have gone into medicine"; a brain surgeon as well. It seems routine to hear "I would give up my practice to be able to play like you" from doctors and lawyers. Stuff like that keeps me going - although it doesn't put food on the table... A lot of lessons with some people are almost like psychiatric counseling. A lot of kids probably see me as a sort of intermediary between them and their parents. It seems like kids are becoming more and more distant from their parents these days. I can tell a lot of kids get no attention at home and are begging for someone to ask "what'd you do at school today" or some such. I had one student break down and cry last year at Christmas and confess she was getting a divorce; didn't exactly know how to take that... Hmmm.. Ironically a friend of mine (who used to be a former student and now teaches at the same store I teach at) told me he ran into another former student of mine. This guy has decided to sell one of his cars he has collected and go "live off the earth" in national parks for this year... He apparently credits me for providing the mindset to do something reckless and "non-establishment".. I dunno yet if that's a good thing or bad... I've got lots of stories like that. Maybe the problem is that they're now being outnumbered by the weird ones, or maybe the cost of living is starting to get to me... I dunno. I know unfortunately it's the most equitable means of making a living for myself presently, given the pay and the time it allows me to pursue music. Which, given all the people who seem to think I can do anything else ("why didn't you go into medicine?" "why don't you go pickup programming again?", "why don't you do photography again?" etc..), makes me more and more freakish as I grow older. It gets old starving after awhile, though... Saving a year to buy one "nice" piece of gear kind of sucks. It's sometimes enticing to see how calm life is with a 9-5 job and a nice house, trophy wife, SUV and swimming pool.. But I have no choice. I just hope music trends, or just general social bozo-ess doesn't make it impossible for me to get by teaching. I may go insane first, but... http://www.mp3.com/chipmcdonald Guitar Lessons in Augusta Georgia: www.chipmcdonald.com Eccentric blog: https://chipmcdonaldblog.blogspot.com/ / "big ass windbag" - Bruce Swedien Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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