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Q:How many bass players does it take to change a lightbulb?

A:None; the piano player does it with his left hand.

 

 

Q:How many bass players does it take to change a lightbulb?

A:One,no Five! One,no Five!! One,no Five!!!

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How many forum users does it take to change a light bulb?

 

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed

 

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently

 

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

 

27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs

 

53 to flame the spell checkers

 

41 to correct spelling/grammar flames

 

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ...

 

another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive

 

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"

 

15 know-it-alls who claim *they* were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct

 

156 to email the participant's ISPs complaining that they are in violation of their "acceptable use policy"

 

109 to post that this group is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb group

 

203 to demand that cross posting to hardware forum, off-topic forum, and lightbulb group about changing light bulbs be stopped

 

111 to defend the posting to this group saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts *are* relevant to this group

 

306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty

 

27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

 

14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's

 

3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group

 

33 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"

 

12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy

 

19 to quote the "Me too's" to say "Me three"

 

4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ

 

44 to ask what is a "FAQ"

 

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

 

143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"

 

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again....

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Originally posted by jeremy c:

How many forum users does it take to change a light bulb?

 

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed

 

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently

 

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

 

27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs

 

53 to flame the spell checkers

 

41 to correct spelling/grammar flames

 

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ...

 

another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive

 

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"

 

15 know-it-alls who claim *they* were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct

 

156 to email the participant's ISPs complaining that they are in violation of their "acceptable use policy"

 

109 to post that this group is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb group

 

203 to demand that cross posting to hardware forum, off-topic forum, and lightbulb group about changing light bulbs be stopped

 

111 to defend the posting to this group saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts *are* relevant to this group

 

306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty

 

27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

 

14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's

 

3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group

 

33 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"

 

12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy

 

19 to quote the "Me too's" to say "Me three"

 

4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ

 

44 to ask what is a "FAQ"

 

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

 

143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"

 

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again....

Agreed.
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Originally posted by jeremy c:

How many forum users does it take to change a light bulb?

 

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed

 

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently

 

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

 

27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs

 

53 to flame the spell checkers

 

41 to correct spelling/grammar flames

 

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ...

 

another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive

 

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"

 

15 know-it-alls who claim *they* were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct

 

156 to email the participant's ISPs complaining that they are in violation of their "acceptable use policy"

 

109 to post that this group is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb group

 

203 to demand that cross posting to hardware forum, off-topic forum, and lightbulb group about changing light bulbs be stopped

 

111 to defend the posting to this group saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts *are* relevant to this group

 

306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty

 

27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

 

14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's

 

3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group

 

33 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"

 

12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy

 

19 to quote the "Me too's" to say "Me three"

 

4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ

 

44 to ask what is a "FAQ"

 

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

 

143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"

 

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again....

You forgot: At least two to quote real long posts that uslessly eat up bandwidth :)
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http://search.bwh.harvard.edu/subjects/lightbulb.gif

 

 

Did I miss the part about oversized images that stretch browser screens and cut off text?

 

Jeremy, has anyone ever told you how much we appreciate your input on this forum? No? Well, I appreciate you. Thanks!

- Matt W.
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4 go go off topic

17 to join in on the off topic remarks

1 to ask how you play a fish.

3 to point out that this isn't THAT forum

2 to say "but you can tune a fish"

1 to withhold, or at least tone down, his bitter and sarcastic comments (me).

If you think my playing is bad, you should hear me sing!
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Originally posted by jeremy c:

How many forum users does it take to change a light bulb?

 

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed

 

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently

 

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

 

27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs

 

53 to flame the spell checkers

 

41 to correct spelling/grammar flames

 

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ...

 

another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive

 

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"

 

15 know-it-alls who claim *they* were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct

 

156 to email the participant's ISPs complaining that they are in violation of their "acceptable use policy"

 

109 to post that this group is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb group

 

203 to demand that cross posting to hardware forum, off-topic forum, and lightbulb group about changing light bulbs be stopped

 

111 to defend the posting to this group saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts *are* relevant to this group

 

306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty

 

27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

 

14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's

 

3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group

 

33 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"

 

12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy

 

19 to quote the "Me too's" to say "Me three"

 

4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ

 

44 to ask what is a "FAQ"

 

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

 

143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"

 

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again....

Me three.

Tenstrum

 

"Paranoid? Probably. But just because you're paranoid doesn't mean there isn't an invisible demon about to eat your face."

Harry Dresden, Storm Front

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Jeremy - well done :idea:

 

1 moderator attempting to rein in the discussion.

 

1 bad joke (usually me, but others contribute)

 

15 posts by people living outside the US about the difference in terminology "over there" (wherever "there" is - Finland, UK, Australia, etc.). Some of these posts will include statements about how lucky we are in the US to have light bulbs (or "lamps" as they call them), or get them so inexpensively. They will use a word like "lorry" and none of the US posters will bother to ask what it means.

 

Tom

www.stoneflyrocks.com

Acoustic Color

 

Be practical as well as generous in your ideals. Keep your eyes on the stars and keep your feet on the ground. - Theodore Roosevelt

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1) I knew this guy that used to change light bulbs - he was the best. Then I saw Victor change a light bulb...

 

2) Jeremy is usually right, so I agree with what he said.

 

3) Where is Dave Brown or Wally with their "wise old sage" advice.

 

4) Tom C, I expect better puns from you.

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Originally posted by ATM:

Light bulb, not toilet paper roll. ;)

Great - now this thread is really in the dumper.

 

And asking me for better puns is an oxymoron.

 

Tom

www.stoneflyrocks.com

Acoustic Color

 

Be practical as well as generous in your ideals. Keep your eyes on the stars and keep your feet on the ground. - Theodore Roosevelt

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Before the invention of the light bulb, illuminating the world after the sun went down was a messy, arduous, hazardous task. It took a bunch of candles or torches to fully light up a good-sized room, and oil lamps, while fairly effective, tended to leave a residue of soot on anything in their general vicinity.

 

When the science of electricity really got going in the mid 1800s, inventors everywhere were clamoring to devise a practical, affordable electrical home lighting device. Englishman Sir Joseph Swan and American Thomas Edison both got it right around the same time (in 1878 and 1879, respectively), and within 25 years, millions of people around the world had installed electrical lighting in their homes. The easy-to-use technology was such an improvement over the old ways that the world never looked back.

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It's certainly true that Edison did invent the light bulb (or at least "a" light bulb), but he wasn't the first. In 1860, an English physicist and electrician, Sir Joseph Wilson Swan, produced his first experimental light bulb using carbonized paper as a filament. Unfortunately, Swan didn't have a strong enough vacuum or sufficiently powerful batteries and his prototype didn't achieve complete incandescence, so he turned his attentions to other pursuits.

 

 

Fifteen years later, in 1875, Swan returned to consider the problem of the light bulb and, with the aid of a better vacuum and a carbonized thread as a filament (the same material Edison eventually decided upon), he successfully demonstrated a true incandescent bulb in 1878 (a year earlier than Edison). Furthermore, in 1880, Swan gave the world's first large-scale public exhibition of electric lamps at Newcastle, England.

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These apply to guys in rock bands...

 

 

What did the bassist get on his SAT?

 

Drool

 

 

Did you hear about the drummer who graduated from high school?

 

Me neither

 

 

What do you do when a drummer knocks on your door?

 

Pay for the pizza

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lol, please, if you want to post jokes up, use the "Search" feature. all of those Jokes have been discussed before.

 

nice try though Peckels.

 

(The SAT one is originally a drummer joke btw)

-BGO

 

5 words you should live by...

 

Music is its own reward

 

---------------

My Band: www.Myspace.com/audreyisanarcissist

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Well, obviously an unsolicited advertisement for the soundclick site.

 

So, here is some unsolicited, yet honest, feedback on the material.

 

How many long, protracted, uninteresting introductions can 10 songs on soundclick contain?

 

I did the research. It is 10.

 

After the long, protracted, uninteresting introductions, you are rewarded with a warmed over versioon of Gregg Allman on vocals and ever-so-off backing vocals.

 

The lyrics are juvenile to the point that they are so childish they are not offensive.

 

The guitar licks are so cliche it makes me wonder if these are actually original songs or if this is a cover band of B-side Southern Rock tunes.

 

Based on the above, I'm sure we'll see them on Warner this summer.

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