Holding the Band together

[Base]

I know this should probably go in the band forum, but if no one minds, I'd rather post it here...

 

Ok, I have been in a band for about 14 months, comprising of me on lead guitar and a long-time friend on rythm guitar and vocals. Neither of us had played in a band before and never in front of an audience. The drummer and bassist I found on a net musicians board, they have both played in a couple of bands together before and have done some gigging (all small pubs and such). All of us have full time jobs and other commitments, family, etc (ok, I have no life, but the rest of them do ). It was developed from the start to be mostly a pastime, we've always taken it seriously but we are playing for fun. We always planned to gig in small pubs and clubs, etc but that was really as far as we ever want to go with it! As we can only rehearse once a week, it took some time for us to build up a repertoire, mostly covers but a few originals (myself and singer started dabbling with song-writing and we came up with a couple). From the start we kept planning to be gigging a few months down the line, but never seemed to be ready, earlier this year we played to a v small audience at our regular rehearsal (but played it as a show, as opposed to just rehearsing in front of them). Ok, it's small stuff to most of you, but remember it was the first time myself and singer had EVER performed in front of an audience!!! We played for about an hour and it went down quite well, no major f' ups, and our audience seemed to genuinely enjoy it. Also, a lass watching joined us shortly after as a second vocalist.

 

The addition of a female singer boosted things a bit, we were able to do songs we weren't previously and since then we have continued adding a few more songs and were even offered a support gig from the new band of the drummer & bassists old bands singer, tho nothing has come of it and to behonest, if we are asked to do it now, we really aren't capable, and that's really the problem...

 

Over the last few months it has all become a bit stagnant, we still seem to be so far away from gigging (the main reason I think is that the singer/guitar player has not learnt any of his lyrics, always reads them from the sheet, we got away with it in our little mini-gig, don't think we will if we take it out) that now it is sapping all of the enthusiasm from the group, we just seem to be going through the motions. Other factors have contributed, such as some weak song choices that it took a while for someone (me) to point out were not working and it turned out almost everyone felt that way and didn't want to be the one to say it. Plus the bass player has taken to smoking some dodgy substances during rehearsal and his playing has gone to pot (no pun intended). Also the singer/guitarist has been playing in another band (this one is supposed to be more of a jamming group) which some members (myself not one of them) feel is impacting on us. There are some external factors on some band members (job & family related) that have caused us to miss some rehearsals lately too.

 

Anyway, we have decided on a kill or cure plan. We intend to set a deadline by which we will have gigged (we all agree that we want to play out), and if we do not make it, then we need to really think about parting ways. I think this is important as we need the focus which has been lacking (we really improved in the couple of weeks before the mini-gig and everyone was fired up about it, just to finally show what we could do). To do this we will all have goals, mainly being that our singers will have to learn all of their parts by heart (this is only really a problem for the singer/guitar player) and get the backing vocals sorted out (something we have neglected on most songs). Also the drummer is going to have a word with the bass player about his 'habits' (sorry, I know there are differing views on drugs in bands, but the rest of us just don't like it!!! Esp. as it is affecting his playing!!!). We've all put a lot of work into this, we like playing together and think it is worth trying to keep it going, but it needs a shake-up or we are all going to lose interest....

 

Basically I wanted to set all that out to you guys and hope you don't mind me tapping into the wealth of band experience here, any advice, observations, witty comments or just outright flaming will all be much appreciated...

[Teahead]

It all sounds very familiar to me and I'm sure it will to others. You're probably beginning to question the returns on your investments, which is perfectly natural, but remember that time, money and energy that could have been spent elsewhere, is already committed now. No going back on that.

 

I'll bet the thrill of that first practice show seems a very distant memory? We had an identical gathering in our practice room, shortly before our first gig. It provided a nice little confidence boost and it's a great idea to have people who aren't playing in the band hanging around, sometimes! However...

 

With the benefit of hindsight, this is nothing compared to the thrill of a real gig. Which, in my opinion is exactly what your band needs to make you feel like a band and not just time wasters. Do what I did, just book it! Phone every pub in the Yellow Pages, some will insist on a demo, some will not. Chance your arm, blow your own trumpet and above all, expect little or no money!

 

Our first gig was in the most unsuited establishment for live bands that our capital city could offer. By a strange twist of fate, the gig coincided with graduation day at the nearby University. The result was one of the best attended gigs we played and the rush lasted for weeks.

 

After we came off stage, we got the offer of a gig the following week and it continued that way for as long as we were together. Like John Lennon said, it's little more than a merry-go-round, the stepping on and stepping off are the hard parts.

 

You have to form some kind of alliance and take leadership, people will very rarely syncronize themselves, someone has to see to it that things happen. If you can't confront those who aren't pulling their weight and you really do feel the need to move on, then so be it.

 

Your personal goal should be to better yourself as a player and a performer. I think it will come pretty easy once you make a few decisions, because you have performed infront of your friends, which for me was always much harder than playing for strangers!

 

Best of luck.

 

Tea.

[Teahead]

By the way, since you have it typed, I think a copy and paste to the For The Band forum might bring this to the attention of some folks who may be able help. You know, folks that... gasp... don't play guitars!

 

I understand entirely why you posted here and I think I would have done the same. But don't miss out on the wealth of experience over there. I'm quite sure that you're allowed to double post for such a good cause!

 

Tea.

[picker]

I agree with Tea (how alliterative of me..oops, I did it again...HEY, DEMON OF BRITTANY SPEARS, GET OUTTA HERE!)

Get a gig somewhere, anywhere, but get one, about a month from when you book it, if you can time it that way, and tell everybody it's on. If your guitarist/singer has to read his lyrics off a sheet in front of an audience just once, it will likely embarass him enough to learn them, simple as that. Rehearse your show as much as you can in the meantime, and then go do it. You will feel like a band after that, and when you feel like a band, you'll start acting like one. Not that "acting like a band" always a good thing...

 

As far as wasting time on tunes that don't work out, everyone does that, it's part of learning what works and what doesn't. Just keep at it.

 

IF you don't already know, find out if the bass players drug abuse is getting under everybody else's skin too(particularly the person who owns or is responsible for the rehearsal space), and if so, tell him he's welcome to smoke his substances any time he wants to, just not on band time, rehearsals or performances. If he doesn't like it, tell him to take a hike. It's a whole lot easier to find a bass player than replace everybody else, or thatn posting bail and paying fines for getting busted, I might add. You should probably do this before you book the gig, but get it done. I guarantee you the problem (resentment over the guy smoking his stuff)will only get worse with the passage of time.

 

It's all very much the same as playing any instrument; you aren't born knowing how to work with musicans, you have to work at it to learn. Just wait, dude, there are bigger trials ahead. Being in a band is a pretty awful thing at times; the only thing worse is not being in a band...

 

Vande

[Billster]

I agree with making a booking to set a hard deadline for your goal of gigging. As Duke Ellington said "I'm not worried about running out of ideas. I've got plenty of ideas, give me a deadline"

 

As far as band dynamics (singers learning their parts, song selection), I think everyone needs a role. It's too hard to all the peripherals yourself. One person should pick tunes and present them to the group. One person should handle all promotional contact with venues and such. One person should be in charge of setting rehearsal schedules and goal deadlines. Look around the group and play to folks strengths. For instance, I detest doing promotion. I'm either humble or shy. So when I'm in a group, I want someone who brings energy and enthusiasm to that stuff. I bring enthusiasm to writing and arranging the songs.

 

Also, when you assign those peripheral roles, state clearly up front that there is a standard to meet, and whoever is in charge of an area needs to crack the whip sometimes but its othing personal. For instance, if I'm told to have the song list organized by Tuesday, and I'm not there, I want someone to kick me in the pants Monday night to get it done. By the same token, if I have to be harsh on someone to get their parts together, they have to understand that I'm not berating them, I'm pushing the part to make our group go. Separate the personal from the politics, basically.

Good luck!

[Base]

Thanks guys, I'll post this on the For The Band thread too...

 

For a long time, myself and the bass player wanted to just book it and force us to be ready, whereas the others wanted to be ready to do it before booking. I admit I'm worried about taking it out if the singer can't remember the lyrics, just think it would bring us all down if the whole thing was a washout, that's why I suggested we set ourselves a dealine rather than booking. Maybe I could give it another month and if things are picking up, singer is beginning to memorise some lyrics etc, then I'll push to go ahead and book it for a month after that and give us the incentive to really push to be ready?

 

As far as the bass player goes, he is the oldest member of the band and I know he has struggled with this for a while, keeps giving up then getting back into it. We are all agreed that we don't want him doing it (at least on band time). As far as I know it was a problem in the previous band and when the drummer talked it over with him, he did give up for a long time, they've known each other for a lot longer than the rest of us, so we're hoping it will be enough to get him to work it out again. Would be a shame to lose him as he's generally a decent guy and a good bassist when he has a clear head.

[Shoes]

Originally posted by Teahead:

.... and above all, expect little or no money!

All of the issues of live performance like sound levels, communications and the visually entertaining elements are easily worked out at parties and casual gatherings. Make yourselves available for any occasion by offering to play.

 

One of my earliest public sessions was in the front yard of a fellow guitar player's parents house. A large wide lawn that was clearly visible up and down the roadway on a holiday weekend Friday. We set up and blasted toward the highway all afternoon and people just started pulling over and getting out of their cars.

 

We all admitted it was stressful at times but what we learned from doing it made a good case for heavy sun block! Among other more useful things.

[JLsound]

"Krazy Glue"

[Bbach1]

Wish I could offer ya some advice Base, but all I can do is wish you well.

[Blue Strat]

How would you feel taking up the duties of being the only guitar player in the band? That seems to me to be a viable solution because you've got a female singer, and the other guy has a jam band on the side. If it works, I don't see any reason for your singer/guitar playing friend to be hurt.

[Shoes]

or... just take his guitar away and keep him. Perhaps it's on of those chewing gum and walking things that's holding up his recollection of the lyrics.

 

Both democratic and totalitarian or dictator controlled bands start, climb, coast, explode and then repeat the cycle with fresh victims

 

Honesty is the best policy. Some people just have to pick it up a notch or pack it in.