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What would you do? I'm seeking advice here.


stepay

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So, I book the gigs for the band. I finally got the booking guy at The Blues Station in town (GREAT blues venue; they also have some rock bands in there now too which is fine since we play both) to agree to book us on a weekend (though we haven't worked out the details yet).

 

Anyway, in order to bring as many people as we can, I agreed to bring in an opening band for us. We usually never do that, but that's common at this place, even when they have national acts come in. I called our former frontman who started another band to see if he'd be interested. He said yes. I told him I was just getting my ducks in a row and had to verify with everyone that it was OK -- thinking that it would be.

 

Well, our drummer is refusing to play with him. Granted we're not even playing WITH him, just AFTER him. He's refusing. Not that I can't find another band, but this guy actually brings LOTS of people to gigs. He's got friends who just LOVE to go out and eat and drink and listen to blues, so he'd be really helpful in this way. Plus, I think he's a good guy and I think it would be fun. The drummer also said he didn't want to play there because he wasn't sure we'd get asked back (this place asks people back SOLELY on butts in seats, and not playing ability). BUT, of course he's all for marketing. I told him that even if we play there once, it's something we can have on our band resume forever. He wants the perfect situation every time. I don't think such a thing exists.

 

Anyway, my band mates have been putting up some roadblocks of late -- too many blackout dates on weekends, getting picky about some of the songs we play and now even in venues we play and whom we sit next to!

 

I spent time making sure our demos were ready for dispersal (made the CD covers, burned the CDs, bought the blank CDs and the jewel cases), spend either my time to drop stuff off to places (and gas money) or my money at the post office to mail stuff (I never ask for any of them to help pay for it) plus I use my color ink jet printer to print out all the promo material that I then send in manilla envelopes that I bought.

 

Of course one answer could be to let them do some of it, but quite frankly even though they are all smart guys, they aren't organized at all and would muck it up very badly.

 

Anyway, I'm thinking of leaving the band and either taking some time off from gigging or just finding another band.

 

I realize most of this is just me complaining, but any insight would be appreciated.

Steve (Stevie Ray)

"Do the chickens have large talons?"

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Stepay,

 

It's time for a band meeting. Lay out your issues and discuss them in an adult (unemotional) manner and hopefully then can do the same. If you have complaints about band members, lay them out honestly and clearly, and hope they respond appropriately.

 

If that doesn't work, look for another band, or replace the uncooperative band member(s)...

 

 

As for the drummer's refusal to play the gig because of the opening band, etc., if some sense cannot be talked into him, I'd find another drummer, either temporarily for that gig, or permanently...

 

aL

Gear: Yamaha MODX8, Mojo 61, NS2 73, C. Bechstein baby grand.

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I ran into the same problem with another band. I did the work to get CD's burned with covers, posters, etc. That band may as well be broken up. We have one gig coming up this weekend and it is the first one since July 4th since I quit promoting it.

 

I have got no real advice for you it is a decision you have to make. But I got into a WORKING band and will play 6 times this month. It was a no brainer for me since I am making the majority of my income from music.

Jimmy

 

Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others. Groucho

NEW BAND CHECK THEM OUT

www.steveowensandsummertime.com

www.jimmyweaver.com

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Stepay,

 

It's a drag when you're the most organized individual in the band and nobody else wants to contribute.

 

It's also a real downer when you've got guys who are exemplary musicians, but you have to work around their egos.

 

There's a sax player with whom I worked in a jazz band a few years back. He is an excellent player - alto and soprano sax as well as vocals. However, he thinks the world revolves around him. I hate to replace him with another sax player, but his attitude makes playing no fun. I'd rather not play if this is the case. Of course, the solution is to find another player.

 

I think that you have posted recently about your disatisfaction with these guys. I'm sorry. Unfortunately, I'm thinking that the best solution is to try to find another group with which to play.

 

Or you can buy Dave Horne's new book, "You Too Can Become A Power Single And Afford Balanced Electrical Power" ;)

"Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and that which cannot remain silent." - Victor Hugo
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Originally posted by Music*aL:

Stepay,

 

It's time for a band meeting. Lay out your issues and discuss them in an adult (unemotional) manner and hopefully then can do the same. If you have complaints about band members, lay them out honestly and clearly, and hope they respond appropriately.

 

If that doesn't work, look for another band, or replace the uncooperative band member(s)...

 

 

As for the drummer's refusal to play the gig because of the opening band, etc., if some sense cannot be talked into him, I'd find another drummer, either temporarily for that gig, or permanently...

 

aL

Great advice. You never know what could come of the meeting -- the band could agree with your stance and change, or let you know that they are maintaining the status quo (making your next move clear).

"Oh yeah, I've got two hands here." (Viv Savage)

"Mr. Blu... Mr. Blutarsky: Zero POINT zero." (Dean Vernon Wormer)

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:D

 

I have usually been the first one to leave every group I was ever in but I only left when I had a better band (or more money) lined up.

 

You know your own worth better than anyone. Is it time to move on .... or not? It's your decision. Every thing in life is a trade off - do you need the money, can you live without the aggravation ....?

 

There will be a book signing at 1 PM at the mall. See ya there!

No guitarists were harmed during the making of this message.

 

In general, harmonic complexity is inversely proportional to the ratio between chording and non-chording instruments.

 

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Stepay, this is the 2nd time in as many months that you have had issues with this band.

 

First, it was the virtuoso guitar player working on his degree. Is it the same drummer with whom I suggested doing a trio thing? :confused:

 

I understand wanting the best for your band. Change is hard for most people in general.

 

As a musician, you have to decide whether it is worthwhile to keep it going, make some replacements or find a more lucrative situation.

 

There are musicians and/or bands out there who would appreciate your dedication.

 

Find them if you cannot resolve this current issue with a band meeting. :cool:

PD

 

"The greatest thing you'll ever learn, is just to love and be loved in return."--E. Ahbez "Nature Boy"

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Communication is a must. If that doesn't work, maybe taking some time off and getting away from each other would do you some good. I would think either you would ewithe rget an urge to continue and go forward or you may like the time away from them in which case its time to move on.

Begin the day with a friendly voice A companion, unobtrusive

- Rush

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...and to think that some people disagree when I compare bands with male-female relationships :rolleyes: ! Only it's much worse, because usually you get intimate enough to make contact with bandmates "issues", yet not enough to slap their faces about it. A real bitch if you ask me.

 

As Mr.Horne pointed above, you probably know how valuable you are. If your band does not mind risking loosing you over the problems you described (ego-based it seems), you should already be heading for the door. Your drummer has his whole life to regret it :thu:

"I'm ready to sing to the world. If you back me up". (Lennon to his bandmates, in an inspired definition of what it's all about).
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Originally posted by burningbusch:

Buy a gun, it's worked for the best.

 

Busch.

http://static.flickr.com/13/15695789_2fad8eeecf_m.jpg

 

Just ask Phil Spector. :eek:

"Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and that which cannot remain silent." - Victor Hugo
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If you are already doing all of the booking, promotion, advertising, hand-holding and ego massaging - you are the de-facto leader Stepay. Whether you want to be or not.

 

In my view, the guy that has taken on the responsibility to make things happen also has to have the authority to make things things happen or all you will get is ever-increasing amounts of frustration.

 

Take charge of this band and tell them how it will be or leave and start your own band. It sounds like you have most of the skills you need to run a band.

 

Change in bands is inevitable - regardless of what you do. You might as well have things your way if you're doing all of the work.

Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer. W. C. Fields
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Maybe if you're the leader, you call the shots. If that means you dump half the guys, so be it. (I'm thinking Steve has a bunch of work invested he won't want to start over with a totally new band)

"I'm so crazy, I don't know this is impossible! Hoo hoo!" - Daffy Duck

 

"The good news is that once you start piano you never have to worry about getting laid again. More time to practice!" - MOI

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I almost forgot -

 

No way to keep a band together. Bands come and go. You gotta keep on playin', no matter with who. - Del Paxton

"I'm so crazy, I don't know this is impossible! Hoo hoo!" - Daffy Duck

 

"The good news is that once you start piano you never have to worry about getting laid again. More time to practice!" - MOI

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Originally posted by soundscape:

Originally posted by Is There Gas in the Car?:

Or you can buy Dave Horne's new book, "You Too Can Become A Power Single And Afford Balanced Electrical Power" ;)

:D
Gassy! Hats off to you! Kudos! :thu:

 

I chuckle at many of these forum posts but this one made me laugh out loud! :D

Steve Force,

Durham, North Carolina

--------

My Professional Websites

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Well, thanks for all the advice. We've had two "serious" band meetings in the last couple months, and it doesn't seem like things are getting through to everyone.

 

Anyway, I just sent an e-mail out to all of them (that's how we all communicate during the week just so you know) that I'm going to think about it through Thanksgiving but that I'm probably done after that. Right now we have NO scheduled gigs because our guitar player booked one gig (he has only ever booked one venue) that the owner thought was tentative, so the owner booked another band. Fortunately for me, I look and see where other bands are playing and I saw that this other band was booked the same night as we were at this club. Turns out they closed the deal and our guitar player did not.

 

Our stated goal has always been to play 2-3 times a month, and we haven't had two gigs in a month since June. Not because I couldn't get any, but because of excessive blackout dates and refusal to play some gigs. I've had enough. Not that I'm the greatest keyboard player or anything, but as you all know we're in demand. I could go join another band TODAY if I wanted to. In fact I got an unsolicited offer (e-mail) from a band yesterday -- they heard me playing on our demos linked off our website.

 

I think though that I want a break from it all. If I'm jonesing to play, I'll go to a blues jam or call some friends and just have a local jam. I never did this to make money. I made less than $2,000 in 2006 from playing gigs. Hardly worth the hassle for me. Kind of freeing in a way. I know some people are into drama, but I am so NOT into drama. Didn't marry a woman who provided lots of drama, and I don't need it in my entertainment world either.

Steve (Stevie Ray)

"Do the chickens have large talons?"

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I don't personally know you; however, I'll bet you aren't a gonna be away from the scene too long... :)

 

Suggestion (FWIW): Buy the band name, legally form a business, register the name. Own the business.

 

That way, it is yours to do what you want with it.

 

IMO, You have what it takes.

Steve Force,

Durham, North Carolina

--------

My Professional Websites

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Forceman,

 

Thanks for the vote of confidence. The drummer and bass player are founding members of the band, so they get to keep the name. Next time I join a band (if I ever do again) I'll make sure I'm not doing all the promo and band booking work.

 

I'm not mad at any of them -- just tired of all the work I have to put in to play.

Steve (Stevie Ray)

"Do the chickens have large talons?"

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Mr. Forceman - thanks. :)

 

Stepay - I understand. I'm sure many of us do.

 

Unfortunately, your story is not unique.

 

I told myself a long time ago - Bands have a beginning, and an end. Repeat that to yourself. It's true. And it's disheartening when you put so much into making your band successful when the other guys don't.

 

I'm pretty happy with my situation these days - other than the corporate band, I'm not formally in a band. I'm free to accept or reject the gigs I get asked to play. As a keyboard player I get to call the shots. I can play solo at a restaurant or private party. I can get a bunch of guys together and play a pickup gig, as needed.

 

Bands are great fun. But I've learned not to look at them as anything but a business deal - not a long term relationship. You've tried hard to make this work. You owe it to yourself to consider your options.

 

Do yourself a favor - figure out how often you want to play and the types of gigs that you enjoy most. After you take a little break and catch your breath, consider trying something new - on your terms.

"Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and that which cannot remain silent." - Victor Hugo
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Well, I posted a few times earlier this year about problems wih my former band. As the last note sounded on our final gig in July, it was curtains for that line up. The bass player and I formed a new band with a female singer, a new guitarist (only 1 this time, sweet!) and the first drummer I started playing with when I was 13!!

Let's just say everything is great these days. I look forward to playing & partying Friday nights with these guys!

We've had 5 jams & have learned 17 tunes.

Would have taken 6+ months with the old lineup.

I'd say put 'em on notice and give it another month or so, if the attitudes change, you'll notice, if not, you'll know what to do. Tell the drummer to get over the opening act.

I'm thinking Almost Famous here, but did he have a gay interlude with your former frontman? ;)

What we record in life, echoes in eternity.

 

MOXF8, Electro 6D, XK1c, Motif XSr, PEKPER, Voyager, Univox MiniKorg.

https://www.abandoned-film.com

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Step if your livin in turmoil. And your not happy with the blackouts or thier not happy with the songs and.. you work as hard as you do. Well for me it would be...

 

You just slip out the back, Jack

Make a new plan, Stan

You don't need to be coy, Roy

Just get yourself free

Hop on the bus, Gus

You don't need to discuss much

Just drop off the key, Lee

And get yourself free...

 

Dude seriously , you live in Columbus,you can be in a new band tommorrow.

Speaking of Columbus we did a wedding up there in October at the German village.Cool part of town with the brewries, we must have done allright the hall called and wanted to give out our name.

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Trill,

 

Yes, I could be in another band tomorrow. That's for sure. Don't think I want to though. I'll miss playing with the guys, and I do enjoy them all, but we just weren't playing enough of it to be fun enough for me. I don't need the money from it, but if I did need the money, I would have quit a long time ago and joined another band that played much more often.

 

Regarding Columbus, yes there are some cool places to play here. Some not so cool ones too, but this is definitely a music town.

Steve (Stevie Ray)

"Do the chickens have large talons?"

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Originally posted by stepay:

Trill,

 

Yes, I could be in another band tomorrow. That's for sure. Don't think I want to though. I'll miss playing with the guys, and I do enjoy them all, but we just weren't playing enough of it to be fun enough for me. I don't need the money from it, but if I did need the money, I would have quit a long time ago and joined another band that played much more often.

 

Regarding Columbus, yes there are some cool places to play here. Some not so cool ones too, but this is definitely a music town.

Actually the band I'm in has had some slow periods also, we tend to hold out for good money gigs and everyone else but the drummer and me are in two or more bands. I plan on looking for more work,I'm still loyal to them. I think some change of tunes and style will help develop and challenge my playing.
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My next band will be a small format two-person with sequenced bass/drums.
http://www.tubaportalen.dk/pic/blandet/multimusik.jpg

No guitarists were harmed during the making of this message.

 

In general, harmonic complexity is inversely proportional to the ratio between chording and non-chording instruments.

 

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