Funny

[Magpel]

Just to add some fuel to the must futile ongoing debate we have here:

 

Check out this clever bit of fun--and don\'t take it too personally please!

[Dave Pierce]

A wild-eyed crowd of chanting fanatics is approaching your door carrying torches and buckets of pitch even as we speak. "Kill the infidel, kill the infidel...."

 

 

--Dave

[whitefang]

Real cute! Now, I imagine if windows got into toilet technology, they would simply keep stopping up! And you'd continually be prompted that you were taking an illegal dump....

 

Whitefang

[Magpel]

Originally posted by whitefang:

Real cute! Now, I imagine if windows got into toilet technology, they would simply keep stopping up! And you'd continually be prompted that you were taking an illegal dump....

 

Whitefang

Yeah, the blue bowl of death.

[Slowly]

Her`s a joke to go with that.

 

A Passion for Beans

 

Once upon a time there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for

baked

beans. She loved them but unfortunately they had always had a very

embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her. Then one day she met

a

guy

and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry she

thought

to herself, "He is such a sweet and gentle man, he would never go for

this

carrying on."

 

So she made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans. Some months later

her

car broke down on the way home from work. Since she lived in the

country

she

called her husband and told him that she would be late because she had

to

walk home. On her way she passed a small diner and the odour of the

baked

beans was more than she could stand. Since she still had miles to walk,

she

figured that she would walk off any ill effects by the time she reached

home.

So, she stopped at the diner and before she knew it, she had consumed

three

large orders of baked beans. All the way home she putt-putted. And upon

arriving home she felt reasonably sure she could control it. Her

husband

seemed excited to see her and exclaimed delightedly, "Darling, I have a

surprise for dinner tonight."

 

He then blindfolded her and led her to her chair at the table. She

seated

herself and just as he was about to remove the blindfold from his wife,

the

telephone rang. He made her promise not to touch the blindfold until he

returned. He then went to answer the phone. The baked beans she had

consumed

were still affecting her and the pressure was becoming almost

unbearable,

so

while her husband was out of the room she seized the opportunity,

shifted

her

weight to one leg and let it go. It was not only loud, but it smelled

like

a

fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of pulpwood mill. She

took

her

napkin and fanned the air around her vigorously. Then, she shifted to

the

other cheek and ripped three more, which reminded her of cooked

cabbage.

Keeping her ears tuned to the conversation in the other room, she went

on

like this for another ten minutes. When the phone farewells signalled

the

end

of her freedom, she fanned the air a few more times with her napkin,

placed

it on her lap and folded her hands upon it, smiling contentedly to

herself.

She was the picture of innocence when her husband returned, and

apologising

for taking so long, he asked her if she peeked, and she assured him

that

she

had not.

 

At this point, he removed the blindfold, and she was surprised. There

were

twelve dinner guests seated around the table to wish her a "Happy

Birthday"!

[Superbobus]

! Windows can not flush the toilet because it's unable to find the sewer. Press F1 for help or try to bear the smell...