Kendrix Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 Ive had better days- much better. Below is the reply to our friend Gus's post of about a week ago regarding the sad loss of his father. ---------------------- "Very sorry for your loss. Im fortunate that both my parents are still kicking ( and my father is still driving Mom nuts listening to "his" music) - maybe I'll give them an extra phone call this week." - Kendrix ------------------------------------ Well - i just came from a visit to the funeral hall with my mother. I got the phone call we all know we will get one day- My father, unexpectedly, is gone. This within a week of the above post. Yes i did speak briefly to him again that week. He&Mom called to discuss my son's birthday present. Then this. Very strange. It somehow seemed appropriate to post this wierd confluence of events to the folks that were a part of them. Uggghhhh. I havge to write a eulogy- never done that before. Woah. Check out some tunes here: http://www.garageband.com/artist/KenFava Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duhduh Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 Very sorry to hear that, Kendrix. My dad went MIA when I was 2 years old and my mom died when I was 19. 10 years later, the world is still a very strange place without parents. "Meat is the only thing you need beside beer! Big hunks of meat and BEER!!...Lots of freakin' BEER." "Hey, I'm not Jesus Christ, I can't turn water into wine. The best I can do is turn beer into urine." Zakk Wylde http://www.hepcnet.net/bbssmilies/super.gif http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/15_1_109.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whitefang Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 Makes no difference knowing they were about to go, either. My Dad was in the hospital after his third stroke, and succumed to pneumonia, in 1980. Three years ago, hospitalized with cancer, my Mother died of heart failure due to the strain of the cancer treatment. Either way, we knew they were going to leave, regardless. Softens it a little, but not a whole lot. And yeah, after all this time, the world IS a strange place without them. My heartfelt sadness goes out to you and your family over this loss. I realize I don't really even know you. But I appreciate the sorrow, and wish you the strength to get through. Whitefang I started out with NOTHING...and I still have most of it left! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dogfur Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 My deepest condolences - Gus, now you - As I type this I am on hold with Kaiser Permanente of Oregon claims ( denied a claim for oxygen supply prescribed by their own doctor- another story for another day )concerning my own father - we are hoping he makes Xmas, it doesn't look good. A tip of the hat to you Kendrix and again Gus, and anybody else who is feeling pain at this trying event in life -it has really thrown me for a loop. Best, Dogfur Woof! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evets Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 Kendrix, words seem terribly...ummmm...you know what I mean. I remember the funeral home visit. A surreal time when the real you is hiding somewhere inside wishing for an end to the dream. The sun does come back out...different though. May God give you much peace. -Steve ----------------------------------- Sometimes ya gotta find out what it ain't, to find out what it is... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bob Keelan Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 There are really no words. Just speak from your heart and you'll be fine. Value every day. Godspeed. bob Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duhduh Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 I'll never forget one thing my mother said to me before she died: Most people walk out of the house and dont know if they're gonna get hit by a truck. At least she knew she was gonna die and had a chance to say goodbye to everyone she loved. She found a great peace in that. And in turn, so did I. "Meat is the only thing you need beside beer! Big hunks of meat and BEER!!...Lots of freakin' BEER." "Hey, I'm not Jesus Christ, I can't turn water into wine. The best I can do is turn beer into urine." Zakk Wylde http://www.hepcnet.net/bbssmilies/super.gif http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/15_1_109.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Franknputer Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 Sorry, Kendrix. I can only imagine what it's going to be like when I get that call... :cry: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dak Lander Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 I'm so sorry. I got the "call" 12 years ago, just before Thanksgiving. We buried dad the day before. It's always a shock. I send, along with my family, prayers and more prayers... :cry: Our Joint "When you come slam bang up against trouble, it never looks half as bad if you face up to it." The Duke... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tedster Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 Man Kendrix...(sigh). My dad died when I was six. My mom passed away two years ago...the day before New Years' Eve. Mom was in the hospital after a series of heart attacks...her blood pressure just dropped to nothing. We knew she was going. She was out of consciousness for the last 24 hours or so. But, I put headphones on her, and played CDs of big band swing, show tunes...all the music she loved. I was hoping that in her waning state, she might have heard something and be magically transported to a dance hall in the 40s...dancing with my dad in his Army uniform. Some happy memory, evoked by hearing that music. Her death was right after Christmas. But, a strange thing happened. A few weeks before Christmas, she asked me to turn the radio down, it was bothering her that the same song was playing over and over, and old big band song called "Look for the silver lining". The radio wasn't on. She heard the song, it was even keeping her awake at night...for about two weeks. It stopped about a week before she went into the hospital. I didn't know what to do...her hearing was very bad, she was slightly senile...I guess I attributed it to that. I didn't mean to get off on that tangent. But, my heart goes out to you. It really does. And your forum buddies are here for you. We do care. Bless ya, brother... Ted "Cisco Kid, was a friend of mine" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super 8 Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 [quote]Originally posted by whitefang: [b]My heartfelt sadness goes out to you and your family over this loss. I realize I don't really even know you. But I appreciate the sorrow, and wish you the strength to get through.[/b][/quote]I think Fang expressed my thoughts about as well as I could have. Kendrix, I am so sorry to read this news. I COMPLETELY understand the "sureal" sentiment that you mentioned. It's like having a strange dream. I think it's the huge emotional toll that makes it feel that way. Also too, the fact that even though you know it's happening it doesn't seem real. "I was just talking to him". "I was just offering sympathies to someone on the forums for their father." A little over a decade ago I was taking a walk with a friend of mine, and I told him that I was concerned because my Dad was 61, and I had started to wonder how much longer I'd have him in my life. My friend's response was "probably another 20 to 30 years, as long as he continues to stay healthy". Hearing that from my friend made me feel better. But it was 20 or 30 years, it was a week. And yes, it was a very sudden and strange experience. One thing you can be thankful for is that apparently your father was able to know his grandson. Unfortunately mine did not, and I would give anything if I could change that. I still have my Mom, and she is very close with my son. For that, I am thankful. My heart, and my prayers are with you. I know it's hard. Take advantage of the love you have around you; your family and friends. Mourn the loss, but also celebrate your father's life. And if you need us at the forum -we're here. Take care, Paul Super 8 Hear my stuff here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kendrix Posted October 31, 2002 Author Share Posted October 31, 2002 Thanks all... for the support. IF only there was something you could do I know you would. Of course, there is really nothing to do. Here goes writing a eulogy- (on my dads hot rod PC) (Im the oldest/only son) I just hope i can deliver it when the time comes. IM sittin here lookina at a WALL FULL of CD's. Lena Horne, D. Benoit, Ella, Frank, Glen Miller x100, The Duke, Ray Conniff,Jimmy Dorsey, Dave Grusin, various Big Band Collections...... ...I actually think he has more discs than I do. Man- how much of this music obsession do you think is hereditary? Interesting topic. Musical inclinations: Genes versus cultural infuence. Me thinks both can play a huge role. Check out some tunes here: http://www.garageband.com/artist/KenFava Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jotown Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 Hey Kendrix, Sorry to hear about your loss. My condolences to you and your family. I lost my dad 5 years ago. I was very blessed to be there with him when he passed. I still miss him though. God bless. Jotown:) "It's all good: Except when it's Great" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sp3nc3r Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 My deepest of sympathies are with you and your family, Kendrix. I am so sorry for your loss. Spencer "I prefer to beat my opponents the old-fashioned way....BRUTALLY!!!!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rold Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 Ditto that...my deepest condolences, Kendrix :( meh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beatheavy Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 Sorry for your loss Kendrix. My condolences. I think I'm gonna give my moms and pops a call today and let them know how much I love em'. ATOMIX! http://www.abc.net.au/common/logos/whtblkgrn.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hippie Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 Kendrix, words are of little comfort in times like these but I'm really sorry to hear this sad news. I hope and pray you and the family are in good spirits. I can sympathize with losing a parent; my dad died suddenly when I was 13. It was tough, but time heals all wounds. It'll get better. peace, Matt In two days, it won't matter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom Capasso Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 Sorry to hear this news Kendrix. I pray for peace for you and your family. I still haven't gotten that call yet. I'll take the time I have... As for the eulogy, I suspect they go best when you just speak from the heart. No cutesy/clever stuff (which is where I would be tempted to go). Not too long (it will just be harder for you to read it, not that he doesn't deserve it). And yes music is in the genes. God bless Tom www.stoneflyrocks.com Acoustic Color Be practical as well as generous in your ideals. Keep your eyes on the stars and keep your feet on the ground. - Theodore Roosevelt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GeorgeVW Posted October 31, 2002 Share Posted October 31, 2002 I was there less then a year ago, when both my parents died within a three week period bracketing Christmas, just a couple of months shy of what would have been their 50th wedding anniversary. As several people have said, the sun will come out again, but on a different world. It's still hard, and I still miss them each and every day. My heart goes out to you and everybody who knew and cared about your dad. My only advice is to make some music, it helps a little bit. George Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan South Posted November 1, 2002 Share Posted November 1, 2002 Kendrix, You and yours have my deepest sympathies. A number of friends and colleagues have lost a parent this fall. It's been a very sad year. The Black Knight always triumphs! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
realtrance Posted November 2, 2002 Share Posted November 2, 2002 Kendrix, My parents both died in the spring (different years), seven years apart. No matter the time of year, the timing, the age, the circumstances, it's...hard. Surreal is a good word for the shock you feel -- a strangeness surrounding everything you see, hear, do, feel, touch, think. My thoughts go out to you. :cry: rt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rim Posted November 2, 2002 Share Posted November 2, 2002 [quote]Originally posted by Kendrix: [b]Thanks all... for the support. IF only there was something you could do I know you would. Of course, there is really nothing to do. [/b][/quote]Prayers helped me when my dad passed away and that is what I offer your dad and his family and friends. May he rest in peace. My dad passed away unexpectedly, too. We were caught off guard. Now that you mention it, we didn't have a eulogy for him - just a mass. Writing a eulogy for your dad, man, that's tough. I was freaked out enough when I had to pick the suit we were gonna bury my dad in. From my experience, the actions you do for this(funeral, eulogy, etc) is mostly for the living he is leaving behind. He is in a better place - it's time to comfort and be comforted by the ones around you. God bless, Rim aka riffing Double Post music: Strip Down http://rimspeed.com http://loadedtheband.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kendrix Posted November 2, 2002 Author Share Posted November 2, 2002 Thanks to you all. Im happy to say i hit a home run with the eulogy. Mom said it was perfect. One of the old folks in my father's community wanted to hire me to do his when the time comes. ;) It was truly uplifting - as all your commments were. Now I know what a "good" funeral is supposed to do. Now enough with this... lets go make some music. Check out some tunes here: http://www.garageband.com/artist/KenFava Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobT Posted November 2, 2002 Share Posted November 2, 2002 My Dad made his transition 6 years ago. You are never prepared for that event. Even though you know that it is going to happen one day. May God comfort you in your loss during this trying time. RobT Famous Musical Quotes: "I would rather play Chiquita Banana and have my swimming pool than play Bach and starve" - Xavier Cugat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
john hartmann Posted November 4, 2002 Share Posted November 4, 2002 I dont' know you but I send my heart felt condolences to you and your family. My mother passed away after 20 years of suffering from many things and finally Lukemia. We brought her back to my fathers house where she passed 3 days later. There is somewhere we go after this life and it is a good place, a better place. Rest assured their pain is over. And for you, you will cry at the smallest thing from time to time, for no reason. But it helps you heal and to never forget. Peace john Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bob Keelan Posted November 4, 2002 Share Posted November 4, 2002 Nice first post John. Welcome to the board. bob Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gus Lozada Posted November 4, 2002 Share Posted November 4, 2002 I have really NO WORDS for you, amigo. However, you really know I am with you in your pain. Let me then, stay silent, behind you. Be strong. Kiss your mom. Músico, Productor, Ingeniero, Tecnólogo Senior Product Manager, América Latina y Caribe - PreSonus at Fender Musical Instruments Company Instagram: guslozada Facebook: Lozada - Música y Tecnología www.guslozada.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meriphew_dup1 Posted November 4, 2002 Share Posted November 4, 2002 I'm sorry to hear about your loss - my condolences to you and your family. www.meriphew.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bunny Knutson Posted November 4, 2002 Share Posted November 4, 2002 :cry: Sincere condolences. https://bunny.bandcamp.com/ https://theystolemycrayon.bandcamp.com/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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