johnfry Posted February 24, 2001 Share Posted February 24, 2001 Hey all, Here's the deal. The band I'm in got together about a year ago. We had all been in other bands and projects that never got anywhere. When we first got together, we wrote and recorded a few songs, and sent some off to various people and record companies. Luckily (or unluckily), we immediately got offered a record deal. Not a big deal, a small one at an independant company, but a deal nevertheless. So we proceed to record our first album, but all we do is fight! We fight about what to record, how to record it, what the arrangements should be, what the musical direction should be, who should do what, and on and on. The fighting has become our biggest problem. I keep trying to think of ways to work out disaggreements, and ways to make things fair, so fights can't happen, but it doesn't seem to work. What should we do? We've got a lot of good songs, and good things could happen, but our fighting keeps getting in the way. Should we just face the fact that we can't get along, and walk away from the deal? Does anyone have any ideas? Thanks, John Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alndln Posted February 24, 2001 Share Posted February 24, 2001 Apart from joining the WWF I don't really have any solutions for you.But at least this came up right away,it usually rears it's ugly head well into a tour and an album deal and the results are pretty costly and depressing for everyone involved.These day's getting something out on an independent is not that hard and certianly not worth wasting a year or more's time if no one shares the same vision.At some point you'll have to put your priorities first.Do you wan't to waste a year or so on something that will eventually lead to disaster?It doesn't matter in this case how good the songs are because if the band can't agree on anything it will never be apparent.I don't mean to discourage you but Iv'e been in this situation before and from my perspective it almost alway's leads nowhere. "A Robot Playing Trumpet Blows" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 24, 2001 Share Posted February 24, 2001 Hehe that brings back a lot of bad memories. http://www.musicplayer.com/ubb/wink.gif It's simply a matter of everybody focusing on what you want to accomplish and where you want to go. If that's not possible, then it's a matter of walking away or getting the person/persons that can't find the focus to walk away and get other personel that can be team players. ------------------ William F. Turner Guitarist, Composer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cooreman.marcskynet.be Posted February 24, 2001 Share Posted February 24, 2001 Shoot'em all .....it's a damn good way to get famous ! Then start a solocarreer even when you're still in prison..... M. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dansouth Posted February 24, 2001 Share Posted February 24, 2001 It depends on the text of your record deal. Have you signed your creative rights away for the next zillion years and married yourself to an unsympathetic label and a group of players who have different ideas about how to proceed? If so, if you can't get out of it, you're going to have to bite the bullet and find some system of compromises that will make this all work. If you're free to leave at any time, I would still try to go the compromise route, but don't waste years in a band that can't find common ground. - Maybe there's a good reason why previous projects went nowhere. - If things don't start to click within the next few months, i.e. if you don't start producing some music that you all love, find some new friends and discuss your objectives thoroughly before you engage in a contractual agreement. If you don't love this gig - really LOVE it - move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lee Flier Posted February 24, 2001 Share Posted February 24, 2001 John, did you all get along OK before you got the record deal? Oftentimes bands go through problems like yours because the intensity of having a deal and getting to do your "vision" is too much for some people to handle. Or at least, lots of people don't handle it very well. They may think it's their only shot at "the big time" or become freaked out by the prospect of committing something to the public eye on that scale, and little things begin to loom large. All the additional time you spend together can also put a strain on personal relations. Fears and obsessions reign supreme. If you feel that these guys really are OK underneath it all, and your experience with them was good up until "the crunch" hit, I'd suggest you take some time off and take a few deep breaths. Maybe step away from each other entirely for a couple of weeks, then regroup and do something fun together. Take a camping trip or something for a few days. Remind yourselves and each other why you wanted to do this in the first place. Think about the musical common ground that you have and try to re-emphasize that. Talk about the issue of getting signed and how that may have changed your perspective on things - a lot of things may be getting blown out of proportion. It gets sooo easy to obsess about little things that don't matter. Recognize that no one person in the band is going to have his personal musical fetish completely fulfilled. You're all going to have to make some compromises. If there is a band leader (and there should be), he should help out with making those decisions that are difficult. Whatever form of leadership you decide on, everybody must agree up front to stick with it. Everybody's opinions should be heard, but if there's a difference that can't be agreed upon, the leader needs to make the call and everyone has to agree to abide by his decision. You have to rely on each other to make this work and it requires everybody being a man and giving up a little to get a lot. A lot of bands try to be a complete democracy but that very, very rarely works. Most bands do have a leader, or two, because it prevents just such things as you're going through: endless fighting and power struggles. Too many times the intensity of newfound success breaks bands apart because they don't recognize it for what it is. Success brings out a range of emotions and convictions that often don't come up until then. But you're still the same people you've always been - you're just unleashing a lot of things that before you felt you had to keep in check. Making your first album is tough! Acknowledge that and realize that everybody is going to act a little goofy. Don't take these early conflicts as a sign that you really don't belong together. You've already been together a year, right? If you're going to survive success - any of you, with ANY band - you've got to learn to do it sometime and that time might as well be now. Just take some time out and regain some perspective. Remember your album is not going to be perfect, and hopefully it is not going to be your only chance to make an album (unless you blow it by breaking up). It's really important at this stage to cover for each other, remind each other to keep egos in check, that you're only making a record after all and not a nuclear bomb. I like to keep in mind the words of Gandhi: "Nothing you do will be of any importance, but it is very important that you do it." --Lee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donriversound.com Posted February 24, 2001 Share Posted February 24, 2001 Sounds like you guys need to find a good producer, who recognizes your talent, and, can be respected as a person by the entire band. If you can all agree on the producer, it's their job to keep you on track, and hopefully, take you to a new musical horizon. You need an objective believer, who can get you back on track! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 24, 2001 Share Posted February 24, 2001 Very simple (but not necessarily easy), figure out who has the most talent and just let him make all the tough decisions. If this isn't possible Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Philip OKeefe Posted February 25, 2001 Share Posted February 25, 2001 Originally posted by don@riversound.com: Sounds like you guys need to find a good producer, who recognizes your talent, and, can be respected as a person by the entire band. If you can all agree on the producer, it's their job to keep you on track, and hopefully, take you to a new musical horizon. You need an objective believer, who can get you back on track! Don: You beat me to it! I was going to suggest the same thing. Phil O'Keefe Sound Sanctuary Recording Riverside CA http://members.aol.com/ssanctuary/index.html email: pokeefe777@msn.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jermushflinthills.com Posted February 25, 2001 Share Posted February 25, 2001 Don and Phil are right on the money. If you feel that the band truely has a future, and you are excited about the music, then you all need to agree on one person to make the decisions. Make sure that person has the respect of the rest of the group, and has your best interests as his main focus. Of the bands that I have played with, the one that made the best music together wrote the best songs, had this same problem, and during the second CD, I wound up leaving due to fights over everthing from song arrangements to abuse habits in the band.....bad break up, but if we'd had a real manager, we'd have worked through them....my 2cents.... ------------------ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Graham English Posted February 25, 2001 Share Posted February 25, 2001 This is something I was taught in marriage counseling. Don't laugh, you guys are in a "marriage" as well. And our relationship is better than ever as a result. It's called mirroring. Each member of the band gets a chance to speak while the other members just LISTEN. You all are musicians so that should make sense. Then the other members mirror back what the speaker has just said and the speaker gets a chance to see if everyone understood and has a chance to clarify any misunderstandings. While this may sound a little corny, at least every member gets a chance to be heard. Hope this helps. And remember- above all ego, it's about the music http://www.musicplayer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif ++ Graham English ++ Ear Training, Songwriting Tips, and Music Theory Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swpdndbcity.net Posted February 25, 2001 Share Posted February 25, 2001 Many times I find that it's one or two people who are involved in all the fighting. If you look back is there one person who seems to be part of all the fights? In past bands where there were problems, there were lots of fights with everyone involved but usually it was the same guy in different fights with different people. If everyone fights with everyone then I would suggest finding players who can get along. The creative process is difficult enough with people who like each other. If it's bad now, what happens when you're on the road for 10 months. There's nothing worse than being on stage with guys you can't stand to look at. Well maybe having sex with someone you hate. Either way no thanks. Hope it all works out. K.D. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnfry Posted February 27, 2001 Author Share Posted February 27, 2001 Hey everyone. Lots of great advice. I really appreciate it. Unfortunately, we've decided to call it quits, at least for now. And this, unfortunately, leads to a whole new set of problems, legally speaking. Please see my next thread! john Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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