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Colder than...


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First...When I was eight years old, my Mother remarried. The following winter, my new Stepfather came in from a night as cold as this one(9 degrees before wind-chill)and proclaimed, "Damn! It's GRAPE NUTS weather out there!" To which my Mom gave him a stern "George!" and looked upset.

 

At that age, I was lost in trying to figure out what breakfast cereal had to do with the cold, and why it would upset my Mother. Figured it out a few years later.

 

But, since then I've heard a few remarks that try to explain just how cold it is...

 

Colder than...

 

...A witch's tit

...A well digger's ass

...A brass monkey's balls

...A sled dog's dick

...An angry wife's glare

...A new groom's feet

...Free coffee

...An Eskimo's nose

...Penguin pussy

...The welcome from your new girl's Dad

...A meat locker in Nome

...Santa's outhouse

...Nixon's handshake

...A dead man's breath

 

Next!

 

Whitefang

I started out with NOTHING...and I still have most of it left!
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... a witches tit in a brass bra

 

cold enough to freeze the nuts off a steel bridge

cold enough to freeze the balls off a christmas tree

 

Man, we had a strange weekend. Saturday and Sunday it was 28 degrees and freezing rain, Sunday night to Monday afternoon warmed up just barely enough to melt the ice and raining. Took my dog out for a walk in the cold Monday afternoon and an hour later I went outside and it warmed up to 55 degrees.

my band: Mission 5
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Originally posted by HiRoller:

Took my dog out for a walk in the cold Monday afternoon and an hour later I went outside and it warmed up to 55 degrees.

See? There ya go. You need to walk you dog more often. ;)

 

Our Joint

 

"When you come slam bang up against trouble, it never looks half as bad if you face up to it." The Duke...

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Originally posted by Spencer Crewe:

You know it's cold when the lube freezes your hand to your.....

 

Line?! What line? When did I cross it? :D:D:D

 

Cheers!

Spencer

You greasing your hair again Spencer? ;):D

 

--

Rob

I have the mind of a criminal genius.....I keep it in the freezer next to mother.
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Originally posted by DakLander:

Originally posted by HiRoller:

Took my dog out for a walk in the cold Monday afternoon and an hour later I went outside and it warmed up to 55 degrees.

See? There ya go. You need to walk you dog more often. ;)
He's a 110 lb. German Shepherd. Skipping our daily walk is not an option...

 

BTW... found out that it warmed up 15 degrees in 15 minutes.

my band: Mission 5
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