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A bit of musical mirth...

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The following comes from David Gross' "Punmaster's Music Wire"...




Ed Salamon sent in this piece from producer/artist Bill Lloyd:


The New Prescription Drugs for Musicians


Next year, leading pharmaceutical companies will be introducing a new


of legal prescription and OTC drugs tailored for the needs of



Talk to your doctor about which ones may be right for you.


Protoolamine - relieves wavering pitch


Dixichixil - prevents unpatriotic outbursts


Divanol - controls excessive melismas and over-emoting


Tylenol-MP3 - for the pain caused by illegal downloading


Polka-Seltzer - fast relief after a night of beer barrels, cabbage

rolls and



Eminenema - for the release of excessive pent-up rage


Hat-actin - for relief of those ten gallon headaches


Sham-E - for depressed Elvis impersonators


Beyoncedril - calms the stress of ubiquity


Reggaine - regrowth for those thinning dreadlocks


¨«Fropecia - regrowth for those ¨«70s soul dos


Debrox-A&R - removes earwax build-up so you can hear that single


Petebestrogen - relieves the disappointment of being kicked out of



Sinatracal - your croon won©öt be the only thing that stays smooth with


high fiber powder


Dylanol - clears nasal passages fast


Brozac - eases the disappointment of white guys who wish they were from




Jambandivent - for those headaches caused by excessive noodling


Brevacid - controls the urge to write songs over five minutes long


Celinex - reduces pain from excessive chest thumping


J-Lotrel - for media overexposure of all kinds


F***iNDeNt (formerly Effindent) - for those hard to clean gold plated



DL-Rothicillin - for the stinging caused by excessive indulgence with



Lesterbangsamine - stimulates the prose of uninspired rock journalists


Keefix - a reanimating elixir, endorsed by Keith Richards


Britalin - for American singers who unconsciously try to sound British


Metallicamucil - for heavy metal and spongy stool

"Cisco Kid, was a friend of mine"
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