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You guys never laugh at any of my jokes


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But I'll keep trying.

 

Enjoy

 

The Bank Loan

 

A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.

 

Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday."

 

Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager. Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.

 

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.

 

Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.

 

She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral."

 

She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"

 

The bank manager looks back at her and says...

 

 

"It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

 

(You're singing it, aren't you?)

 

Never take life too seriously! Come on now, you grinned, I know you did!!!

 "Let It Be!"

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Originally posted by Philip O'Keefe:

NYC Drew fires himself... film at 11.

 

I had heard that joke before, but you still got a grin out of me with it. :D

Judging by some of Drew's stories, I thought you meant "Drew fires on himself!" ;)

 

Yeah... heard a version of that joke and yes, I'm punny enough to smile. :)

It's easiest to find me on Facebook. Neil Bergman

 

Soundclick

fntstcsnd

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Originally posted by Kcbass:

You guys never laugh at any of my jokes

http://www.kvr-vst.com/forum/images/smiles/icon_hihi.gif Now that's funny!! http://www.kvr-vst.com/forum/images/smiles/icon_hihi.gif
"A Robot Playing Trumpet Blows"
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Flip Wilson had a joke where the punch line was - I come not to praise your berry but to seize it.

No guitarists were harmed during the making of this message.

 

In general, harmonic complexity is inversely proportional to the ratio between chording and non-chording instruments.

 

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nyuk nyuk nyuk

I used to think I was Libertarian. Until I saw their platform; now I know I'm no more Libertarian than I am RepubliCrat or neoCON or Liberal or Socialist.

 

This ain't no track meet; this is football.

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Originally posted by Super 8:

:D Okay....okay...

 

Stop me if you've heard this:

 

A bear an a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods.

 

Bear says to the rabbit; "Do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?"

 

Rabbit says; "No."

 

So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit.

Know how it feels when you have to pee real bad?

Yeah, I do!

Well, feel me and see if I have to pee.

 "Let It Be!"

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Originally posted by Botch.:

I laughed at your picture on the "Whatdyawl Look like?" thread, does that count?

 

Juuuust kidding! :D:P:wave:

Tain't funny. I have been told I look like Alfred E. Neuman. Kcbass

 "Let It Be!"

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Originally posted by Super 8:

:D Okay....okay...

 

Stop me if you've heard this:

 

A bear an a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods.

 

Bear says to the rabbit; "Do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?"

 

Rabbit says; "No."

 

So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit.

I s'pose you think that shit's funny. :evil:

 

Ain't I a stinka? :freak:

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Originally posted by Bunny.:

Originally posted by Super 8:

:D Okay....okay...

 

Stop me if you've heard this:

 

A bear an a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods.

 

Bear says to the rabbit; "Do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?"

 

Rabbit says; "No."

 

So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit.

I s'pose you think that shit's funny. :evil:

 

Ain't I a stinka? :freak:

Now THAT's funny :D

Músico, Productor, Ingeniero, Tecnólogo

Senior Product Manager, América Latina y Caribe - PreSonus

at Fender Musical Instruments Company

 

Instagram: guslozada

Facebook: Lozada - Música y Tecnología

 

www.guslozada.com

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