KenElevenShadows Posted March 25, 2004 Share Posted March 25, 2004 Originally posted by Lee Flier: Originally posted by Rim.: The beginning of a relationship is all about fun and getting to know each other on a more general level - not for exposing your inner being. And some women like men who are "mysterious" so not telling her everything you are thinking may make you more attractive to her. YIPES. If you have to resort to this kind of game playing and play acting to seem attractive to someone, they're not worth it in the first place.Yeah, that game-playing just doesn't wash with me (or most adults I know, for that matter). To me, it's not "mysterious". It's non-communication, and for someone I would be dating who is being "mysterious", I can add one mystery of my own to their little head: "Hey, I wonder who he's going out with now?" Ken Lee Photography - photos and books Eleven Shadows ambient music The Mercury Seven-cool spacey music Linktree to various sites Instagram Nightaxians Video Podcast Eleven Shadows website Ken Lee Photography Pinterest Page Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phaeton Posted March 26, 2004 Author Share Posted March 26, 2004 Btw, I've got one of my customers hounding me and insisting that i let her take me to dinner sometime... I don't need this right now! Dr. Seuss: The Original White Rapper . WWND? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phaeton Posted March 31, 2004 Author Share Posted March 31, 2004 Well... Thanks everyone for the advice, suggestions, empathy and even just plain hearing me out. I just had my brain all jumbled up with "what if"s and no one to turn to. My roommates wouldn't be any use in this situation, blah blah blah. So anyways, I drove up to her place and spent the weekend there. Met her entire famn damily. Loads of uncles, aunts, a couple of grandmas and grandpas, a smattering of nieces and nephews. Met her dad and stepmom. Stepmom is cool, aunts gave me the 20-questions and excessive screening (as expected), grandma gave the seal of approval, and her dad is a jackass. I also met her pet catfish (which is the length of my arm) and loads of birds and saltwater critters, along with grandma's two dogs, named Max and Max. But i guess the important thing is, we were able to eventually get away and spend some real quality time together, hang out, do fun stuff. Did loads of driving around blasting and singing along (horribly, both of us) with the Dead Milkmen, Violent Femmes, Neil Young and Cream. We got to talk. We brushed over the "let's not go so fast" topic (and also some other stuff) and it wasn't a big deal at all. It all came together nicely, as it should. I'm really starting to like this girl, i am I'm no longer all uncomfortable about mis-aligned expectations or anything. I couldn't have done it without ya :-) Dr. Seuss: The Original White Rapper . WWND? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lee Flier Posted March 31, 2004 Share Posted March 31, 2004 Yay!!! That made my day. Go phaeton! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phaeton Posted March 31, 2004 Author Share Posted March 31, 2004 Yay!!! That made my day. Go phaeton! Aww shucks... i'm glad it did... but like i said, i couldn't have done it without y'all. And it's always advice from Lee Flier that sinks in the best. Say Lee... You know, she's a native of GA, and i was introduced to her by her ex boyfriend who is still in Atlanta. I could hook yew up Dr. Seuss: The Original White Rapper . WWND? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KenElevenShadows Posted March 31, 2004 Share Posted March 31, 2004 That sounds promising!!! Good luck. I'm happy for you that it's going well. Ken Lee Photography - photos and books Eleven Shadows ambient music The Mercury Seven-cool spacey music Linktree to various sites Instagram Nightaxians Video Podcast Eleven Shadows website Ken Lee Photography Pinterest Page Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phaeton Posted March 31, 2004 Author Share Posted March 31, 2004 Thanks Ken! The following advice you gave really helped set me on track: I hope that you are patient, enjoy her company and your time together, and just let everything evolve naturally. Just knowing that there are things you can't force by saying or doing, but there will be the right time and place for that, and you will know it when that time comes. It will feel *right* when you have it right. I held back blurting out my concerns all willy nilly, and that would have probably made things awkward and wierd. Instead i was patient, and eventually saw the right opportunity. And it worked. I hope i'm as patient with other aspects. Dr. Seuss: The Original White Rapper . WWND? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phaeton Posted April 19, 2004 Author Share Posted April 19, 2004 Btw... I guess it is a good sign when.... Nothing at all has changed about her appearance in the 7-8 weeks i've known her, but she's becoming more and more pretty every time i look at her. Dr. Seuss: The Original White Rapper . WWND? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lee Flier Posted April 19, 2004 Share Posted April 19, 2004 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mats Olsson. Posted April 19, 2004 Share Posted April 19, 2004 Originally posted by phaeton: Btw... I guess it is a good sign when.... Nothing at all has changed about her appearance in the 7-8 weeks i've known her, but she's becoming more and more pretty every time i look at her. Thats the finest thing I've heard all day, dammit! http://www.lexam.net/peter/carnut/man.gif What do we want? Procrastination! When do we want it? Later! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phaeton Posted April 19, 2004 Author Share Posted April 19, 2004 Thats the finest thing I've heard all day, dammit! Sure beats Reflectoporn. Oh, btw, Lee.... This weekend we went to some guitar stores just for giggles and grins. Oh my you should see the way she just *drools* over this goldtop LP that was in there.... Maybe there's something in the water in Atlanta? Dr. Seuss: The Original White Rapper . WWND? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lee Flier Posted April 19, 2004 Share Posted April 19, 2004 LOL phaeton... well actually I am from L.A. and I lived there when I got my Gold Top, 20 years ago. Personally I think it just means she's obviously a woman of impeccable taste... if she likes Gold Tops and she likes you, she must be! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super 8 Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 Originally posted by phaeton: Btw... I guess it is a good sign when.... Nothing at all has changed about her appearance in the 7-8 weeks i've known her, but she's becoming more and more pretty every time i look at her. http://www.gowdy.org/cp90.GIF "And I can't fight this feeling anymorrrrrrre I've forgotten what I started fighting forrrrrrr It's time to turn this ship into the shore and throw away the ores foreverrrrrrrrrr" Super 8 Hear my stuff here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super 8 Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 http://www.allposters.com/IMAGES/MMPH/250396.jpg "When we are together They're moments I cherrish With ev'ry beat of my hearrrrrrrrrt" Super 8 Hear my stuff here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super 8 Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 http://www.dvdweb.co.uk/reviewgfx/snl_eddie1.jpg "Unce.....Tice.....Fee times huh mady" Super 8 Hear my stuff here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KenElevenShadows Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 Originally posted by phaeton: [QB]Thanks Ken! The following advice you gave really helped set me on track: I hope that you are patient, enjoy her company and your time together, and just let everything evolve naturally. Just knowing that there are things you can't force by saying or doing, but there will be the right time and place for that, and you will know it when that time comes. It will feel *right* when you have it right. I held back blurting out my concerns all willy nilly, and that would have probably made things awkward and wierd. Instead i was patient, and eventually saw the right opportunity. And it worked. QB]Wow, that's great! I am so glad that it worked for you. I like your comment about her getting prettier over the course of several weeks. That's a great sign. Relationships work best when they occur naturally, organically. Sometimes it just takes a while. Keep us updated! I should mention, too, that my girlfriend and I got together in a somewhat similar way. We'd been friends for several years although we really hadn't hung out together (usually in groups), and then slowly, started doing things together, and we just naturally grew together. Even though I was occasionally dating, after a while, that dropped off as my girlfriend and I started getting closer. It was a really cool, beautiful evolution of things over the course of 2-3 months of doing things together. Ken Lee Photography - photos and books Eleven Shadows ambient music The Mercury Seven-cool spacey music Linktree to various sites Instagram Nightaxians Video Podcast Eleven Shadows website Ken Lee Photography Pinterest Page Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phaeton Posted April 20, 2004 Author Share Posted April 20, 2004 Personally I think it just means she's obviously a woman of impeccable taste... if she likes Gold Tops and she likes you, she must be! EEEK!! Blatant Flattery! I dunno if liking *me* means impeccable tastes, i've got a lot of flaws and whatnot, but at least we can say she's tolerant and patient Oh and btw Lee, i'm not trying to creep you out by pointing out similarities between her and you.. i just thought it was bizarre that she really has a soft spot for a Gold Top, on TOP of all sorts of other odd coincidences... Super8 on the other hand is keeping me in stitches by getting all silly and sappy Wow, that's great! I am so glad that it worked for you. I like your comment about her getting prettier over the course of several weeks. That's a great sign. Relationships work best when they occur naturally, organically. Sometimes it just takes a while. Keep us updated! Yeah really... it's not like there is anything unattractive about her to start with, but there were several instances last week and this week, where she'd be doing something silly, or she'd just look up and smile, and i was just struck with "holy damn is she beautiful" type thoughts. It was a really cool, beautiful evolution of things over the course of 2-3 months of doing things together. This might take us a lil bit longer.. The unfortunate thing is that we live about 2.5 hours apart. We only get to spend weekends together, which has probably helped me out in my indecisiveness. Kinda gives me some time to step aside and overanalyze everything to death. But in the long run, it's definately going to start holding things up. I've always dug the Madison area, It just oozes with all that College Town Vibe, and the subject of me relocating (and finding a newer, better job) has come up several times. We're not going to go out and rush into anything, but we brought up once the idea that she's going to be looking for a roommate at the end of the summer..... We both agree that it's a nice thought, but we'll have to see how things go between now and then, etc. Obviously that brings up a whole 'nother set of issues, but you know. Dr. Seuss: The Original White Rapper . WWND? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phaeton Posted May 11, 2004 Author Share Posted May 11, 2004 Btw, when she gets all mushy on me and stuff, and I feel like (literally) getting up and running away, is that the proverbial "Fear Of Commitment"? Gah.. i'm so confused about all my emotions. Does that ever happen to anyone else? Dr. Seuss: The Original White Rapper . WWND? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lee Flier Posted May 11, 2004 Share Posted May 11, 2004 Seems to happen a lot with most people. I never know whether it means they're just with the wrong person, or it's general fear of commitment. All I know is it drives me up a wall. Sometimes I wish I just had commitment phobia like everybody else and didn't care about certain people so damn much, who were afraid to care as much back. I'm sure things are easier that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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