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The age difference and where to draw the line


EddiePlaysBass

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This forum consists of a good mix of young and once-young bass players, so this is as good a place as any to ask, I guess. Where do you draw the line in age-difference?

 

Reason I am asking is a ridiculous one: I accidentally stumbled upon an add from a covers band living almost next door (5 minutes by car) who play this:

 

Ufo : Doctor Doctor

Steppenwolf : Wild Thing

Green Day : Basket Case

Elvis Presley : Blue suede shoes

Ozzy Osbourne : Paranoid

The Scabs : Hard Times

Pennywise : Bro Hymn

Gunsn Roses : Knockin on heavens door

Three doors down : Kryptonite

AC-DC : Highway to hell

The Police : So lonely

 

and a medley consisting of : Smells like teen spirit (Nirvana) - For whome the bell tolls (metallica) - Born to be wild (steppenwolf) - rocking in the free world (Neil Young)

 

They seem to get frequent gigs and the material is stuff I find "interesting" and know or have known for the most part ... But here's the kicker: they're 14 year olds :( I'm 28 so I'm the same age as two of them combined !!! But I know from experience that 14-year olds can sometimes play circles around us "geezers". Or not, obviously.

 

Guess I'll email them anyway. Might be that they have as much a problem with an "old guy" (:rolleyes:) in the band as I do playing with teen musicians :)

"I'm a work in progress." Micky Barnes

 

The Ross Brown Shirt World Tour

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I'm the youngest of the lot in my covers band.

 

Me 26 oldest geezer 45, all others 36 and 38.

 

Everything works fine I tend to give them more grief then they give me....

 

If they play and they are good, why not

 

www.myspace.com/davidbassportugal

 

"And then the magical unicorn will come prancing down the rainbow and we'll all join hands for a rousing chorus of Kumbaya." - by davio

 

 

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There's a huge difference between a 14 year old and a 28 year old. They may be able to play, but the potential problems are many.

 

I play with guys that are much younger than me. I'm 42 and they range from 21 - 30. While the age range is similar, it is entirely different from your potential situation. We are mature (mostly) and can handle all the stuff that comes with being in a band, working with others, etc. etc. The drummer is even a former student of mine.

 

I would highly suggest staying clear. I see only problems in your future.

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Do you really want to be in a band in which none of the other members can drive?

 

...or legally get off with the babes?

 

:)

 

G.

A very important element in the equation that you should not overlook.

 

No kidding- that's the scary part. All it would take is some little girl with teen drama issues to start telling people the wrong thing and you could be in a heap of trouble.

 

In this day and age, at least here in the States, people would look at you a little funny with a grown man playing in a band with a bunch of kids barely into high school, especially not being a relative or good family friend. How is it in your corner of the world?

 

Personally, it looks like it would be a great experience to mentor some young musicians. But, it could be awkward at times.

 

Trust your instincts on this one.

"Political language... is designed to make lies sound truthful and murder respectable, and to give an appearance of solidity to pure wind"- George Orwell
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My first "big, hit the road" band when I was 17 was fronted by a 40-year old and the average age was upper 30s. The lead singer was a younger female, though.

 

I could state an arbitrary rule about what ages I will play with and what ages I won't but tomorrow I will be offered a chance to break that rule and I will.

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There is quite an age difference in my primary band: I'm 57 and the other two guys are 24 and 25. The only problem we have is that I can't flirt with the female audience members for fear they'll tell their mother...my wife.

 

But as has already been said: there's a huge difference between 20-somethings and teens.

 

I would be willing to advise and assist a teenage band, but would not become a member.

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I hope the band's signature song isn't "Thank Heaven for Little Girls."

 

Revenge Of The Pink Panther comes to mind.

 

As for the kiddie band, I wouldn't do it EPB for all the reasons listed above - unless their moms are totally hot.

Seriously I like my fellows to be at least 21 and able to hold a conversation without every other word being "dude".

"He is to music what Stevie Wonder is to photography." getz76

 

I have nothing nice to say so . . .

 

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Not saying I'd want to be the only 28 year old in a band with a bunch of 14 year olds, but: The drummer I used to play with until he went to Berkley for music was about 13 or 14 when I started playing with him. I got to be good friends with his parents, and they appreciated knowing that I wasn't a creep, and that their son was safe. It was kind of neat watching him grow up both musically and personally, especially since I won't be having any children of my own, thanks to Dr. Stop (T.M.I.????). It was a drag being the driver, and I definitely did refuse more than a few beers, what with me being the adult and all. Again, dunno if you'd want to pursue a gig with only youngsters. Just sayin'.

 

 

Things are just the way they are, and they're only going to get worse.

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"There is quite an age difference in my primary band: I'm 57 and the other two guys are 24 and 25. The only problem we have is that I can't flirt with the female audience members for fear they'll tell their mother...my wife."

 

Uh, if the mother of the female audience members you want to hit on is your wife, that means you want to hit on your daughter.

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Uh, actually....

 

He can't flirt with the female audience members because they (his bandmates) will tell their mother (his wife). You see, he's in a band with his two sons. And they'll tell his wife that he's carrying on with the young girls. And she'll get angry. Ya see?

 

 

Push the button Frank.
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Do you really want to be in a band in which none of the other members can drive?

 

...or legally get off with the babes?

 

:)

 

G.

A very important element in the equation that you should not overlook.

 

No kidding- that's the scary part. All it would take is some little girl with teen drama issues to start telling people the wrong thing and you could be in a heap of trouble.

 

In this day and age, at least here in the States, people would look at you a little funny with a grown man playing in a band with a bunch of kids barely into high school, especially not being a relative or good family friend. How is it in your corner of the world?

 

 

Personally, it looks like it would be a great experience to mentor some young musicians. But, it could be awkward at times.

 

Trust your instincts on this one.

 

http://www.derok.net/derek3/images/grill/michael%20jackson%20trial.jpg

 

Or play in a local club (provided Belgium has a drinking age?)

 

 

 

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn

 

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See this is why I lurk over at TalkBass and post here :thu: I realised myself that I'd have to do 4 auditions: one with the band and then one with each parental unit. And yeah I guess if it were my kids I'd be asking questions too, even if I'm a musician myself and would look at it differently.

 

Plus, every single time that I have tried to start or join a classic rock band with a similar repertoire, it blew up in my face. Big time. I guess it's The Universe's way of saying *booming, thunderous voice* "You are a rockabilly bass player, live with it" :grin:

"I'm a work in progress." Micky Barnes

 

The Ross Brown Shirt World Tour

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I sympathise with Eddie. I'm Geezer trapped in the body of a two-feel, jazz standards, 3/4 double bassist.

 

I'm glad to see that classic rock bands across the pond are as weird, vapid, self-centered and self-destrictive as they are on this side of the pond. I thought it was just me for a while.

 

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn

 

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Pass on this, but don't give up on finding other opportunities.

I think it's a requirement that the other band members are adults. After that, you figure out if there is a line to draw. Heck - you were in a band with your father - it's fine to have broad backgrounds in any direction (age, music, race/color/creed). You just need to stick to adults.

 

Tom

www.stoneflyrocks.com

Acoustic Color

 

Be practical as well as generous in your ideals. Keep your eyes on the stars and keep your feet on the ground. - Theodore Roosevelt

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I think it's a requirement that the other band members are adults.

 

Tom

 

But . . . doesn't there really need to be a guitar player?

:rimshot:

Thank you!

"He is to music what Stevie Wonder is to photography." getz76

 

I have nothing nice to say so . . .

 

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Flank (... :grin:) classic rock bands are probably the same everywhere - dysfunctional families :( Would that make jazz bands upper class glossy magazine families? And where would that leave us rockabilly / country bands?

 

Ps: Tom, thanks for a new sig line :grin:

"I'm a work in progress." Micky Barnes

 

The Ross Brown Shirt World Tour

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Uh, actually....

 

He can't flirt with the female audience members because they (his bandmates) will tell their mother (his wife). You see, he's in a band with his two sons. And they'll tell his wife that he's carrying on with the young girls. And she'll get angry. Ya see?

 

 

His post doesn't say anything about the guys being his sons. The subject o the sentence is "the female audience members" so the "they" refers to them. Sorry to be a pedant, but that's a confusing sentence. Of course, he could just be from Kentucky.

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