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Totally OT: Classic Emails from Another Profession


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My wife is a Realtor. There are as many stories in that profession as there are in the music profession. But, here is an email she received today that I've got to share. Skip over if you want, but this is a classic...


"I called Tony, the inspector, and he said he was the one who inspected my house (he came over today) and he remembered this being the house that had no insulation in the attic and I already have a gas bill that is over $250 and I haven't even been here a full month yet and I've not even used anything gas except my heat but a couple of times so I need to find out who does insulation and how much it will cost and get that done or I will go under on the gas bills alone. Anyway, even Tony cannot figure out what is going on here on the electrical problems because there is no rhyme or reason to the electrical problems I am having (in other words, it doesn't make sense that only the pull chain in one of my bedroom closets has electricity going to it and is just the pull chain that needs replacing but that all the electrical outlets on that side of my room don't work either so they are not connected in what is wrong and we are having problems with certain outlets that are too random to be explained--they are not confined to just all outlets in one area or one room and are randomly messed up throughout the house and he said he very carefully checked the electrical stuff in the house when he came because the house is so old and it could be dangerous). I called the electric company before calling him to be sure they had not messed something up when they cut off my electricity and only half of it was cut off and they cannot explain how that happened either as they said it is not possible to cut only half of it off, just like we said, it has to be either all on or all off. However, when they had to put a new pole in my front yard for my phone (my phone lines went dead too and the phone jacks had to be replaced because they were hanging out of the walls in two places), they not only left a deep dangerous hole where the other one was that someone could fall into and get hurt and sue me for but he said he feels very strongly that they are the ones who have messed my electric stuff up. I told him they were adamant that it was not them and have been out here once already but weren't even going to check my breaker box (like he said they should) until I was insistent on it but I don't know what else to say and I don't want to pay a person to come out here on the HOW (it's not the best coverage; ours in Las Vegas was much better and the payment for each visit was only $45 and not the $75 they charge for this one per visit and in the fine print it says that if they come out and find it is something that is not covered by their policy they will charge me more) when it very likely or even just could be the electric companies fault and Tony feels strongly that it is theirs since the problems didn't start until they cut off my electricity and only parts of it were cut off which doesn't make sense. And then they changed the pole for my phone and all my electrical is coming in on that same pole (the electric company and the phone company were out here at the same time so they should have made sure together that all was right, wouldn't you agree?).


Anyway, I was going to ask you if when you said the blinds were staying were there only one set of blinds in the house to stay? I just assumed that when I asked about the curtains and you said the blinds were staying that there was more than just one room with blinds in them and there is only my bedroom that has blinds. I was just curious because I just know that they had more updated doorknobs on all the doors in here and removed them all and put old ones back on because I have to replace almost every doorknob in the house and one you can tell had a different kind of doorknob on it before (the one to my bedroom) and the bathroom door upstairs didn't even have one screw in it!!! My brother came over to tighten up all the door knobs because my daughter got locked in the bathroom and couldn't get out and no one could hear her and somehow she finally was able to get out but when my brother went to tighten it he found that there were no screws even in it so I think they couldn't find the screws to the old knobs when they changed them and just stuck the knob in there and left it like that. Steve, my brother, is going to pick up for me new door knobs to some of the rooms because he didn't have any screws to go in there and he said no wonder she couldn't get out. Oddly enough I usually use the downstairs bathroom but when me and Derek have used the upstairs one we never closed the door completely for some reason and she did so that's why it happened to her and no one else.


By the way, the inspection sheet says and Tony confirmed that they do not check every single outlet (and the sheet says that about anything there are many of, like windows) so he wouldn't have caught all these problems. There are outlets that have blown out on the kids upstairs (and he is concerned, as is my brother, about possible fires on some of these things the previous owners wired wrong etc.) that he said are wired wrong because of reverse polarity and the switch in the downstairs bathroom has to be on for the plug-in in there to work! He said if they put in the GFI switches themselves they probably wired them wrong. He was very nice.


Just wanted to ask you about the blinds and let you know about the other. Don't know if it will get fixed by the electric company or if I'll have to call an electrician. He told me if I didn't get any satisfaction out of the electric company because he feels certain it's their fault as all worked well before they cut my power off that I should call the mayor. I'm at the point where I am so tired of fighting everyone over all this stuff but if I have to call the mayor I will but don't even know who that is.


Hope all is well with you. Take care.



[steevo here] What can I say? Back to our guitar related stuff now...

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Originally posted by FumbleFingers:

My family is looking awfully normal to me right now.

Is this person on crack or just totally whacked?

Pure friggen genius!

On crack ... no. Totally whacked ... um, yes. And she is the aunt of my son-in-law ... so that means family, right? Yikes! :eek:
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No offense meant....funny E, seamless segues directly from one problem issue to another....personally, I would have a hard time being the one at the Help desk....uh, no thanks!


" Hi, I need a part for my bike"


" Okay, what model is it? "


" Well it's a Yamaha"


" Yes, we are a Yamaha dealer....what model is it? "


" Well it's a red one"


" Okay,....is it a Maxim?"


" I don't know, that sounds familiar, it has like a round thing with lot's of holes in it and a tube coming out of it up in the front..........."


Seriously, I have heard this type of stuff out of the mouths of people.

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Steevo, sorry to hear this is family-I was going to say, if there`s one born every minute it must have taken this person ten minutes to be born... :) but I wouldn`t want people jumping on my misfortunes either, there`s enough for a football field-size trampoline.

Same old surprises, brand new cliches-


Skipsounds on Soundclick:


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These run-on sentences sound like some legal documents I have to translate.


The one I'm working on now appears to say that lawyers are recycled in Brazil. I'm sure that's not REALLY what it means, but they sure recycle their legal mumbo-jumbo endlessly!


Re: help desks. I simply couldn't DO it. I worked at a bank as a methods analyst, but sometimes we'd get stuck talking to customers or branch personnel.. some of whom were nice, lucid, intelligent people.. and some were, well, not! What does this person WANT? Do THEY know? Cut to the chase, please, there are 500 other people trying to get through, all with urgent problems...


Well, why worry about problems I don't have anymore?? Maybe Alfred E. Neumann has a point!

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Originally posted by rockincyanblues:

Also off topic, but here is a discussion thread that hooked me this week:




I wouldn't be surprised if the home buyer in the first message in this thread is a patient in one of the messages in this "STudent Doctor" thread.

That is some crazy stuff there. My wife once sold a house to a husband/wife emergency room doctor team and they had endless stories like those. Why do people do what they do??
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While in college I worked security at a local hospital - 11p to 7a on the weekends. saw some weird stuff - like a guys saliva gland in his cheek which had been sliced open in a fight - but never things like these guys/gals are talking about.
Raise your children and spoil your grandchildren. Spoil your children and raise your grandchildren.
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