#1718302 - 03/16/07 03:53 AM
:(
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Phunki
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Registered: 03/16/07
Posts: 7
Loc: malaysia
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I have a band where I play the guitar and my friend plays the drums. Problem is, my friend the drummer sucks! He doesn't admit that his counting is wrong whereas all the other members know it's his mistake. We've tried talking to him nicely, but to no avail. I don't have the heart to sack him but at the same time it's ruinning the band's reputation. What do I do? Please help!
Phunki
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#1720661 - 03/21/07 10:49 AM
Re: :(
[Re: Phunki]
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RicBassGuy
MP Hall of Fame Member
Registered: 02/02/05
Posts: 3746
Loc: Metro Detroit, MI
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Hey Phunki, welcome to the forums. Just fyi, this post would probably get more looks (and answers) with a more descriptive subject, like "how to fire a friend?"
I was in a similar situation in a garage band except I was not the band leader calling the shots. We were a power trio and all three of us were friends. The drummer kept losing time on fills; we'd just wait for him to finish and then re-establish the downbeat. So every four measures we'd have a 4.63 beat measure or something.  The band leader fired the drummer, and then we went through several replacements over several years before finding someone that fit. In the end both the band and the friendships dissolved, although for separate reasons.
One way to approach things is to record a band rehearsal, then have your drummer friend listen to the recording. As the saying goes, "tape never lies"; he should be able to hear his mistakes clear as day, perhaps for the first time. Once he admits he has a problem you can move on from there.
Another approach is to rehearse to a click track. Admittedly even good musicians have a hard time playing along to a click track the first time. However, it will keep everyone honest when it comes to timing. Although bands that use a click live will use in ear monitors (IEM) -- so the audience never hears the click -- you guys can use whatever is available for your rehearsals: an electronic metronome through the PA, laptop computer with simple MIDI track, keyboard/sequencer, etc. If possible make the downbeat (beat one) different from the other beats so there is no disagreement as to where "one" is.
Either way, your "excuse" can be that you're preparing to record a demo. This way your friend doesn't feel like he's being targetted.
If your friend cannot admit to his mistakes, refuses to improve, or even admits to them and decides to improve yet never follows through, what choice do you have? Well, you have at least two choices.
You could fire him. This may affect your friendship. Or not. But at least your band can move forward (after finding a replacement drummer).
You could also dissolve the band entirely. At least on the surface. Let the other guys know what's going on, so you can "reform" the band without your drummer friend. This is a more passive approach. Your friend may see this ruse for what it is and be even more upset with you for not being direct with him. Or he may actually believe you when you tell him the other guys begged you to put the band back together with the new drummer they found.
Edited by RicBassGuy (03/21/07 10:51 AM)
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#1721208 - 03/22/07 05:38 AM
Thanx!
[Re: RicBassGuy]
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Phunki
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Registered: 03/16/07
Posts: 7
Loc: malaysia
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RicBassGuy, thanx a million 4 ur advice!  i will surely follow them one by one and hopefully don't come to the last option! (firing him... but hey, if it needs to be done, i'm sure as hell ready to do it!!) i trully appreciate ur reply, thanks again
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