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#959873 - 05/07/01 10:27 PM How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
ricknbokker Offline
Gold Member

Registered: 12/10/00
Posts: 570
Loc: Telford,PA,UNITED STATES
O.K....One more topic, and then I'll leave you guys alone.

And I swear, this is not posted to rile you up, Lee!

One of my current drummers, (I'm working with 3 right now) shows up at rehearsal the other day with a problem. "Maybe you can help", he says.

He hands me a brand new AKG D112 bass drum mic, saying "I don't know what's wrong with it. I can't get it to work. So, I try it out, and sure enough- it's no go.
"Take it back to the store" I said. He says "I can't. I don't have the reciept...or the box...and I bought it 8 months ago. I'm not even sure where I bought it."

"Didn't you try it out when you bought it?" I asked. he goes "No. I tried it for the first time last night."

At this point, I'm only slightly exasperated, since it wasn't my $200 down the dumper. So I calmly ask "Did you at least fill out the warranty card before you tossed everything else?"

I don't think I have to tell you his answer.

Is it just me, or isn't this a real-life indication that we need a little 'thinning of the herd' as far as homo sapiens is concerned??

Go to it, Lee

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#959874 - 05/07/01 10:34 PM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
Lee Flier Offline
10k Club

Registered: 09/13/00
Posts: 15398
Loc: Atlanta,GA,UNITED STATES
LOL!!

Well of course I can't help but agree that was a dumbass thing to do. All I can add is that this phenomenon is not limited to drummers! It seems that in the recent "gear buying frenzy" brought on by the economic boom, LOTS of people have stuff they've never tried out and never do try out until after the warranty expires. They buy stuff "just to have it" and forget about it.

I have to wonder therefore why the guy bought the mic in the first place if eight months later he was just using it for the first time. Definitely I would say it was a symptom of general excess and "gear acquisition syndrome" - again, not peculiar to drummers!

--Lee
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#959875 - 05/07/01 10:50 PM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
d gauss Offline
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Registered: 02/15/01
Posts: 3231
Loc: Somewhere in the Swamps of Jer...
my old drummer sped up so much he was a complete "beat off"....

-d. gauss

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#959876 - 05/08/01 01:00 AM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
ricknbokker Offline
Gold Member

Registered: 12/10/00
Posts: 570
Loc: Telford,PA,UNITED STATES
I just didn't have it in me to ask him the reason for the purchase. Apparently he told one of the guitar players that he heard it was the best mic available for the money.

I think you're right. Definitely a case of G.A.S.

Btw, I know quite a few excellent drummers who appear to be somewhat intelligent! My getting on drummers is merely my favorite 'shtick'.

But, then again...

Steve

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#959877 - 05/08/01 07:58 AM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
spacebass_dup1 Offline
Senior Member

Registered: 03/04/01
Posts: 239
Loc: chicago,il...usa
shouldn't it read "how drum is my dumber" er something like that.
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#959878 - 05/08/01 09:07 AM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
davemc Offline
Senior Member

Registered: 10/19/00
Posts: 80
Loc: Northcote,,AUSTRALIA
My old drummer used to take home the rehersal tape and learn all the out of time drum rolls spot on.

I recorded his new band the other week and was laughing with the bass player about this and she said "he still does"

My housemates drummer and me had a run in last week when I recorded them.
There was no way into his drums as they were covered in cymbals, he said one mic will do over the top, but I want thoose in your face punchy drums.

Then when we listened back to the track it was speeding up and down. He said a little speed variation is fine. The song is 157bpm and went down to 110-118 in places.



------------------
Bye Dave
http://www.indentmusic.com.au
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#959879 - 05/08/01 12:37 PM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
coyote Offline
MP Hall of Fame Member

Registered: 04/16/01
Posts: 7012
Loc: New York,NY,UNITED STATES
I was a drummer who was accused of "slowing down" by one band.... I made them do a little exercise I learned in music school. Put on a click track, and clap in time. Sure enough, after @ six measures they started to get ahead of the click. When I pointed it out to them they DENIED it! So I put the recorder on.... I never heard from them again about slowing down.


Quote:
Originally posted by studio@indentmusic.com.au:
Then when we listened back to the track it was speeding up and down. He said a little speed variation is fine. The song is 157bpm and went down to 110-118 in places.
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#959880 - 05/09/01 07:52 AM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
davemc Offline
Senior Member

Registered: 10/19/00
Posts: 80
Loc: Northcote,,AUSTRALIA
Hey Coyote. I had it the other way as well.(although drummer picking on is fun)
I knew a metronome like drummer who was playing out of time as the band did not have his timing. He would follow them then they would follow him. quite funny actually.

Had to hand move a lot of a Bass players parts in one song.
Drums swayed like 3-4 beats only.
Even when we solo'd the track and tapped along could not see they were out.
Wanted the drummer to play it again.

That could be another thread those who cannot hear there mistakes as they are used it??
Vocalist at the moment is having a problem with one part, makes me cringe and go for auto tuning which I rather not use. Play it back and was told I do not know what you are going on about its fine.

There another thread about bitching about clients I should go there now.


------------------
Bye Dave
http://www.indentmusic.com.au
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#959881 - 05/10/01 09:04 AM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
KBP Offline
Senior Member

Registered: 03/12/01
Posts: 135
Loc: VV,CA,UNITED STATES
Shit, no ones more stupid than my drummer. So stupid I can't even explain it, but I'll give you a clue. she's on her 5th DUI, been through a couple of 24 month drinking programs and still drinks from the time she wakes up till she passes out at night and still gets behind the wheel everyday. Oh, and if she needs one more break at practice to go outside and cry cause were too tough on her, I think I'm gonna shoot her. But she plays soooooooooo good. You can't even imagine. Her feel is down right moving.

KBP

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#959882 - 05/10/01 05:49 PM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
Michael Riehle Offline
Senior Member

Registered: 12/05/00
Posts: 47
Loc: Stockton,CA,UNITED STATES
Quote:
Originally posted by KBP:
[...snip...]she's on her 5th DUI, been through a couple of 24 month drinking programs and still drinks from the time she wakes up till she passes out at [...snip...]But she plays soooooooooo good.[...snip...]


You know, it almost annoys me most that it's often the most talented musicians I've known that have the worst substance abuse problems. It's almost like they are completely hopeless in all other aspects to compensate for being talented in some way.

I dunno, it annoys me, though.

Maybe it's nature's way of keeping talent a rare thing.


------------------
Michael Riehle
Bass Player/Band Leader
fivespeed
CA Local Bay Area Music Webring
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#959883 - 05/10/01 08:19 PM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
KBP Offline
Senior Member

Registered: 03/12/01
Posts: 135
Loc: VV,CA,UNITED STATES
Yea, but how far do you let it go?

K

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#959884 - 05/10/01 08:53 PM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
Hippie Offline
Platinum Member

Registered: 04/13/01
Posts: 1898
Loc: Sterling Heights, MI
Quote:
Originally posted by Lee Flier:
LOL!!

Well of course I can't help but agree that was a dumbass thing to do. All I can add is that this phenomenon is not limited to drummers! It seems that in the recent "gear buying frenzy" brought on by the economic boom, LOTS of people have stuff they've never tried out and never do try out until after the warranty expires. They buy stuff "just to have it" and forget about it.

I have to wonder therefore why the guy bought the mic in the first place if eight months later he was just using it for the first time. Definitely I would say it was a symptom of general excess and "gear acquisition syndrome" - again, not peculiar to drummers!

--Lee


Lee,
Haven't you ever seen something on sale, that you didn't need today, but you knew it was a good deal, had the cash and went for it? ex.-I don't need a tuba mic, but if I see one for 25.00 & it's good quality, I would probably get it, thinking *well, one day I might be really happy I got this.* It's kinda like buying a clearance priced snow-blower in July.

-Hippie
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#959885 - 05/11/01 02:46 AM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
ricknbokker Offline
Gold Member

Registered: 12/10/00
Posts: 570
Loc: Telford,PA,UNITED STATES
Hippie-

I would hope you would make sure that snow blower works before winter!!

Steve

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#959886 - 05/11/01 04:57 AM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
Duhduh Offline
Platinum Member

Registered: 04/27/01
Posts: 1602
Loc: Costa Mesa, CA
The worst is the person who is out of time is the who is complaining about it!

In an old band of mine, our bass player constantly ragged on the drummer for being out of time. We finally convinced the drummer to follow a click on headphones. The bass player couldnt stay in time for more than 2 measures! It was hilarious! He then blamed it on the drummer for not following the click correctly even though everyone else was in time. Once convinced of that, he blamed it on the click! LOL
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#959887 - 01/17/02 10:51 PM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
techristian Offline
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Registered: 11/01/01
Posts: 1253
Loc: Windsor,,CANADA
Many times a good drummer will be accused of DRAGGING if he doesn't pick up speed. Blame the poor drummer!

Dan

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#959888 - 01/18/02 06:34 AM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
Flea man Offline
Senior Member

Registered: 10/22/01
Posts: 68
Loc: Los Angeles,CA,UNITED STATES
KBP wrote:
Quote:
she's on her 5th DUI, been through a couple of 24 month drinking programs and still drinks from the time she wakes up till she passes out at night and still gets behind the wheel everyday. Oh, and if she needs one more break at practice to go outside and cry cause were too tough on her, I think I'm gonna shoot her. But she plays soooooooooo good. You can't even imagine. Her feel is down right moving.


John Bonham did have a daughter! \:D
Make sure she doesn't sleep on her back...

But really, 5 DUI's?? Sounds like she's going away for a while...if she doesn't kill someone and/or herself 1st. \:\(

Probably should have a plan "B" in the works (start auditioning drummers!)...just to be prepared.

Flea Man

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#959889 - 01/18/02 09:55 AM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
teh dri Offline
Gold Member

Registered: 07/05/01
Posts: 624
Loc: AUSTRALIA
ive seen similar situations


get rid of her, its a danger to your band.

"that band with the alco who crashed into so and so"


the best evidence drummers are dumb is how much they pay for their racks, little clamps, tiny screws and so on

ok well i play the drums among others but its not my main instrument, and to be honest, id rather program my drums (kinda necessary, we are a DNB live act)

drum kits are the perfect metaphor for a drummer

big, heavy, filled with air..... non-sentient :p

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#959890 - 01/18/02 11:45 AM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
dturner Offline
Senior Member

Registered: 09/21/01
Posts: 134
Loc: Cedarville,OH,UNITED STATES
I am a guitar player. My son is 20 and a drummer, so I am entitled to make following jokes: [I am also part Polish, and a recovering Catholic, so don't get me started]

What do you call someone who hangs out with musicians? .......a drummer.

Did you hear about the night the band was late getting started? The bass player locked his keys in the car and they couldn't get the drummer out.

I challenge anyone to come up with more mediocre jokes than these!

DT

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#959891 - 01/18/02 01:57 PM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
Lee Flier Offline
10k Club

Registered: 09/13/00
Posts: 15398
Loc: Atlanta,GA,UNITED STATES
Boy, I guess somebody's really into bringing back threads from the dead! \:\)

Quote:
Originally posted by DRiLoad:

drum kits are the perfect metaphor for a drummer

big, heavy, filled with air..... non-sentient :p


You forgot "expensive". \:D

Our drummer is actually quite small, light and compact, and so is his kit. He doesn't do drugs or drink either, and is a witty, intelligent guy. I think he's on a mission to prove all the drummer jokes wrong! But, the way he can beat the everlovin crap out of the drums you'd think he was Moon or Bonham sometimes, except he's already considerably outlived both of 'em...

--Lee

[ 01-18-2002: Message edited by: Lee Flier ]
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#959892 - 01/18/02 02:34 PM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
Dwarf Offline
Platinum Member

Registered: 04/17/01
Posts: 1295
Loc: Montreal, Quebec, Canada
I once did sound for a band and after the first set I went back into the dressing room with them. They were ragging on their drummer because in the middle of one of their tunes there's a four bar breakdown and the drummer always came in late. He couldn't count four bars. So they told him to just count to 16 - he replied that it was too hard to do that in the middle of the gig. This guy had less brains than my cat.

--
Rob
Drummer, Singer, Sound Tech, all around nice guy.
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#959893 - 01/19/02 02:29 PM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
natty fred Offline
Senior Member

Registered: 12/01/01
Posts: 224
Loc: Brixton, London UK
Ok first up I would like to say that I think I have been incredibly licky in my experience of drummers, 99% have been wonderful..

But there was this one drummer in a band I played with on & off for about 5 yrs who we called "stand by". The band would be all set-up and ready to play and we’d be chillin’ while we were waiting to get up. Then the guitarist would say something like, "were up after this tune…". Every time without fail our drummer would be there in visible sight right up to the very moment we picked up our instruments, then he would disappear. And we would go on "stand by". We tried talking to him, keeping an eye on him, everything… but somehow these phenomena lived on……

peace,
natty

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#959894 - 01/19/02 03:21 PM Re: How Dumb Is My Drummer??!!
ricknbokker Offline
Gold Member

Registered: 12/10/00
Posts: 570
Loc: Telford,PA,UNITED STATES
This is great!! I'm glad we have some new members here, if only to bring up topics I posted last May! \:\)

Jeez... must have been on page 57...

Anyway, I'm glad it was brought up. I always thought it rated better than 16 replies. \:D

Since it was so long ago, how about a 'Where Are They Now?' piece?

Let's see... The drummer mentioned in the first post moved to Vegas, never to be heard from again. The rest of the band plunges forward with a new dumb drummer, who apparently is only comfortable playing disco. He is replaced by another drummer, who only plays with the band once, his work schedule prohibits any more get togethers. I have no chance to find out if he is dumb or not.

The keyboardist slowly returns to his alcoholic leanings, driving the rest of the band to distaction. The band continues jamming with a rotation of three drummers, two of which are dumb, the other having a crush on the drunken keyboardist.
The keyboardist is irked, to say the least, the rest of the band thinks it's hilarious. \:D

A late summer gig is planned, with the band's original drummer is in attendance. He is the greatest and brightest drummer I have ever known. I may have a crush on him.

The bassist (me), spends 2 months replacing his deck, building a stage, and generally busting his ass to make this thing happen. A crowd of friends and family numbering 60 to 70 people are invited. It rains. Hard. All day. The decision is made to move the gig into the house. The gig is scheduled to start at 3pm. The bassist moves all of the equipment into the house and sets it up all by himself.
The rest of the band shows up at 3:30. Just before the first song, the bassist quits, making the announcement on the PA.
The band plays on... performing one of thier best shows.

Guitarist #1 quits the band 3 weeks later. He has nothing going at the moment.

Guitarist #2, the founder of the band, tries to keep it going. The only drummer that will play with him is the dumb disco drummer. He has nothing going on at the moment.

Guitarist #3, also the lead vocalist, leaves the band. He has nothing going on at the moment.

The keyboardist jams for fun on occasion with the bassist. He has his alcoholism under control once again. No one currently has a crush on him.

The bassist is trying to establish a collaboration with his cousin. (Mindrive on these forums). He is working to put together a DAW, to help bring this collaboration to fruition.
He spends entirely too much time on these forums, and is trying to learn as much as possible, but usually just gets people riled up. He keeps the moderators busy.

Well... there you go. Not exactly 'Behind The Music', but what the hell. Some guys will do anything to reach 500 posts. \:D

Steve

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