OT- I'm gonna be rich!!!

[Baldwin Funster]

I got an email about a rich uncle I didn't even know I had. Now I can sit at home and play keyboards all day long with no worries (keyboard corner tie in). Jealous much?

 

 

 

 

 

Isaac Miller

1 message

No attachment

5:41 AM

Attention please

Attention please: On behalf of the Trustees and Executor of the estate of my Late Client Engr.J whom you share the last name with I once again try to notify you as my earlier letter were returned undelivered. I wish to notify you that my late client made you a member of his family beneficiary to his Funds before he died. He left the sum of (US$32.3million) in the Bank here in lome Togo. I look forward to your urgent response. May his soul rest in peace Amen. Yours sincerely, Barrister Isaac Miller

[ElmerJFudd]

lol - we could easily make this the longest thread of time just posting these emails. I get a few a week.

[JohnDoe]

lol - we could easily make this the longest thread of time just posting these emails. I get a few a week.

 

What´s wrong with me? I never get that type of e-mails!!

[ElmerJFudd]

Mine tend to be a widow abroad looking for me to hold on to her fortune until she is settles in the US. At which time I would transfer her assets to her and keep a % for my troubles.

[Song80s]

when it pertains to wealth, I only listen to Susie Ormond.

 

She is also my 3rd cousin but for some reason, she ignores this

[PianoMan51]

Don"t be afraid to send them money upfront to pay for processing costs!

 

No, wait...

 

Dont! Be afraid to send them money upfront to pay for processing costs!

[wd8dky]

I miss the Nigerian Prince from the earlier days of the Internet. He was a generous fellow.

[16251]

All this talk has me thinking, maybe, this will be the year I win Publishers House Sweepstakes.

[David Emm]

I used my lome Togo debit card to pay my Nigerian scammer. Let THEM slug it out. I have enough trouble with just AT&T. They're scam-y too, but at least its consistent. MY uncle is only rich in Crown Royal bags. I'm rich in plug-ins.

[TommyRude]

Hey Jr Deluxe, is it possible we're related? I think we might have the same uncle

[Baldwin Funster]

Hey Jr Deluxe, is it possible we're related? I think we might have the same uncle

I inherit 32 million dollars and all of a sudden everybody is my cousin.

[Dr Mike Metlay]

Don"t be afraid to send them money upfront to pay for processing costs!

 

No, wait...

 

Dont! Be afraid to send them money upfront to pay for processing costs!

 

"Let's eat, Grandma!"

 

"Let's eat Grandma!"

 

Punctuation Saves Livesâ¢

[Ed A.]

[video:youtube]

[Tom Williams]

My latest ones involve a "scanned check" which has an .xmls or such file type -- It's MS Excel with macros, in other words, an executable Trojan horse. No copulatin' way I'm opening that file. If I'm feeling ornery I respond with "I received your scanned check, but my PDF reader can't display it -- I think you scanned it improperly. Please re-send as a PDF image so we can move forward on this."

[jazzpiano88]

Hey Jr Deluxe, is it possible we're related? I think we might have the same uncle

I inherit 32 million dollars and all of a sudden everybody is my cousin.

 

I found 629 boxes of checks, in an attic with your name on it. Hopefully you're getting a decent royalty.

[o0Ampy0o]

My latest ones involve a "scanned check" which has an .xmls or such file type -- It's MS Excel with macros, in other words, an executable Trojan horse. No copulatin' way I'm opening that file. If I'm feeling ornery I respond with "I received your scanned check, but my PDF reader can't display it -- I think you scanned it improperly. Please re-send as a PDF image so we can move forward on this."

They are looking for the Trojan horse payload. It is unlikely they would risk opening emails from targets. At least you enjoyed imagining their reaction as you were composing your response.

[The Real MC]

All this talk has me thinking, maybe, this will be the year I win Publishers House Sweepstakes.

 

Oh judas, that reminds me of my elderly father who entered sweepstakes, gave to charities, and bought commemorative coins. Once you get into one of those, your mailbox gets flooded with their junk mail. I was helping them with their mail and they were real annoying.

 

Then when my father became a missing adult (found alive thankfully), one of the mail we received during that ordeal was a collection claim from a commemorative coin company. Well they didn't count on a son who could write a very good legal-sounding letter. I wrote back disputing the collection, blasting them for pursuing the action during a time of great family distress, highlighting their violations of federal elder abuse laws when they knew they were exploiting a mentally ill person, quoting federal collection law that stated they had zero claim to any retirement assets of my father, and promising to report the collections agency and the commemorative coin company to the FTC, the state AG, BBB, and other agencies responsible for business fraud.

 

A week later, the flood of junk mail STOPPED. COMPLETELY. We never heard from collections again. They got cold feet when a family member not only intervened but made legal threats.

 

THAT'S how you stop the flood of junk mail.

 

I told the story to my elder care attorney, and he was IMPRESSED.

 

It also highlighted that these junk mail producers are all in cahoots.

[Mighty Motif Max]

My latest ones involve a "scanned check" which has an .xmls or such file type -- It's MS Excel with macros, in other words, an executable Trojan horse. No copulatin' way I'm opening that file. If I'm feeling ornery I respond with "I received your scanned check, but my PDF reader can't display it -- I think you scanned it improperly. Please re-send as a PDF image so we can move forward on this."

 

Ah yes, the good old .docm Word files too.

[o0Ampy0o]

All this talk has me thinking, maybe, this will be the year I win Publishers House Sweepstakes.

 

Oh judas, that reminds me of my elderly father who entered sweepstakes, gave to charities, and bought commemorative coins. Once you get into one of those, your mailbox gets flooded with their junk mail. I was helping them with their mail and they were real annoying.

 

Then when my father became a missing adult (found alive thankfully), one of the mail we received during that ordeal was a collection claim from a commemorative coin company. Well they didn't count on a son who could write a very good legal-sounding letter. I wrote back disputing the collection, blasting them for pursuing the action during a time of great family distress, highlighting their violations of federal elder abuse laws when they knew they were exploiting a mentally ill person, quoting federal collection law that stated they had zero claim to any retirement assets of my father, and promising to report the collections agency and the commemorative coin company to the FTC, the state AG, BBB, and other agencies responsible for business fraud.

 

A week later, the flood of junk mail STOPPED. COMPLETELY. We never heard from collections again. They got cold feet when a family member not only intervened but made legal threats.

 

THAT'S how you stop the flood of junk mail.

 

I told the story to my elder care attorney, and he was IMPRESSED.

 

It also highlighted that these junk mail producers are all in cahoots.

Pseudo-legalese and luck .....something shined on you.

 

The cable channels catering to old timers have plenty of commercials and infomercials designed to hook old fish. My father had a good income from his retirement plan. He would get bored and one of the few things he could derive gratification from was going through the process of purchasing things. You initiate a transaction and get something in return. He also ordered one for everyone in the family. But my father frequently forgot what he had ordered by the time things arrived. He might open the box. Sometimes he just enjoyed receiving a delivery and left it unopened in the dining room.

 

A door to door solar heating salesman saw easy prey. He knew he was taking advantage of him. One day my sister who lived a few minutes away stopped by and the crew was on his roof. My bother-in-law got them to stop the work immediately. They produced a contract my father signed obligating him to pay several thousand. My brother-in-law tried to get them to see the error of their ways explaining the situation. The solar company people did not care. I told my brother-in-law to refer them to me. I had consulted an attorney. He laid out possible directions things could go. I spoke to the solar company people one time giving them one more chance to do the honorable thing then I simply ignored them. When my father passed away a few years later I was the executor of the estate. The notification went out giving everyone a chance to make a claim for money owed. The solar company did not respond.

 

I had my father's mail coming directly to my house in the final years of his life. He passed away in 2016. After many attempts to stop it I am still receiving junk mail for him.

[KuruPrionz]

I run an ad blocker on my computer interwebz.

 

I have all of my internet shut off completely on my phone. If there is an emergency I can turn stuff back on. So far so good.

 

I still get spam every day, gmail is pretty good at sorting it.

 

My favorite is the constant barrage of warnings from Fakebook that "Animul" tried to log into my Facebook account. Except, I don't have a Facebook account. And Animul can't even spell Animal.

People must fall for this stuff or they would not keep trying it, would they?

 

Grandma used to donate to a certain organization. It got out of hand, she was going to need money for her own survival and she was giving it away. I started intercepting her mail, filled the postage paid return envelopes with dirt (one time rusty nails) and sending them back. Pretty soon they went away.

[Joe Muscara]

I like the ones where they say they turned on my computer camera and have great footage of me watching porn, and if I don't pay their bitcoin account, they'll release it to my friends and family. Unfortunately, they haven't. I want to see what I did.

[Adan]

I like the ones where they say they turned on my computer camera and have great footage of me watching porn, and if I don't pay their bitcoin account, they'll release it to my friends and family. Unfortunately, they haven't. I want to see what I did.

 

The sad part of getting these is having that moment of doubt where I ask myself "did I actually do that?" (No, I didn't)

[dfcas]

My 94 y/o mother got a letter in the mail that a cousin she did not know died without a will and she would be inheriting money. It turned out to be real and she got a lot of money. Enough to remodel her house and be "comfortable" she says.

[Tom Williams]

My 94 y/o mother got a letter in the mail that a cousin she did not know died without a will and she would be inheriting money. It turned out to be real and she got a lot of money. Enough to remodel her house and be "comfortable" she says.

I sure hope she didn't have to pay the $2500 fee to "clear up" the transfer. :-)

[Baldwin Funster]

My 94 y/o mother got a letter in the mail that a cousin she did not know died without a will and she would be inheriting money. It turned out to be real and she got a lot of money. Enough to remodel her house and be "comfortable" she says.

I sure hope she didn't have to pay the $2500 fee to "clear up" the transfer. :-)

 

The difference is the 94 yo mother got I assume was a legal document in the US mail from a lawyer that can be checked out at the bar. The legal bar not the corner bar. That's different than a badly spelled email in broken english with vague promises. Still, thieves get smarter. If I got a notification like that in the us mail I would first assume its bogus.

[o0Ampy0o]

It was bizarre how the envelope containing the prepaid card for stimulus money was easily mistaken for junk mail.

 

How could everyone in the process not foresee that possibility?

 

Makes you wonder.

[FatFingers]

I've been really lucky and don't have to lift a finger or contact anyone to get free stuff. I have been informed that my Order no. 18372018182 is arriving.

[Lou Gehrig Charles]

All this talk has me thinking, maybe, this will be the year I win Publishers House Sweepstakes.

 

Oh judas, that reminds me of my elderly father who entered sweepstakes, gave to charities, and bought commemorative coins. Once you get into one of those, your mailbox gets flooded with their junk mail. I was helping them with their mail and they were real annoying.

 

 

My mother had a hard time saying No to people who would call trying to sell her stuff. Most were harmless, like magazine subscriptions, extra home-cleaning services, etc. but some were or could have been much more costly. One caller had her leave the house in a big hurry to go to the bank to get money to supposedly bail her brother out of jail (her brother who was at the time dying of cancer). Another one had her turn on her computer and they installed some sort of team-builder software on it that let them create an account on India's version of Amazon, and buy all sorts of stuff.... The next day they called back and were angry with her and demanded she go to Western Union to wire money to India or she would go to jail. And more probably I never heard about.

[ProfD]

I receive enough spam to keep Hawaii fed for a year. The emails and phone calls are ridiculous. I find it incredulous that someone is actually being paid to do this BS.

[NewImprov]

A couple years ago, I got a form letter from a law firm in Portland, including a check for $94.68. It said I was part of a class action settlement against a chain of gas stations. It seemed really suspicious and scammy, like one of those checks that is actually a loan at ridiculous interest if you cash it, or something. But I couldn't find anything on the check that looked illegitimate. I took it to my bank, and expressed my concerns, the teller agreed it looked suspicious, and sent me to a manager. The manager laughed, said he'd seen a bunch of those checks in recent days, and approved it.

 

it turned out that a local station from that chain had closed recently in my neighborhood, and I had gone to it many times because it was the only station open late in my area, as I am often driving at night to and from gigs. The class action suit had to do with their over-charging debit cards illegally. Anyone who had used a debit card at this station was automatically enrolled into the class action suit. The payments were to be spread over 2 years. This year I got a 2nd check, same amount.